Soberintexas007

I was in your same predicament the last couple of months. I told myself that I would stop, but I just could not. I was totally baffled and confused, and I was so worried that my life would fall apart because I cannot function when I drink. I was caught on Monday drinking at my mom's birthday, and with my family's support and AA, I have 4 days today, soon to be 5 days. It sucked that I got caught, but it was also good because my family reminded me of my track record while drinking and have been giving me good support. I finally feel like I can do this again like I did before, but I obviously don't want to get too confident. It is day by day, and I can go back to drinking at any time, especially since there is beer in the house since my husband drinks.

Bh28

I've done it again. I took a Librium this morning and my doctor advised me not to leave the house whilst I'm taking these pills.

I got up about 7:am and AA wasn't until 1:pm and got really sick of waiting plus my flat is a real mess which depresses me and I have absolutely no motivation or energy to tidy up. I know it's no excuse but it really stressed me out so went to the local shop and bought a big bottle of vodka.

esinger

Get some help man! Don't take those pills and drink vodka. Benzos and alcohol don't mix!
Not a Dr. but it sounds to me like you need a supervised detox. My GP gave me valium when I was trying to self detox. Turns out he didn't no much about alcohol addiction. I ended up in hospitalized detox for five days.
Pull out of it! Things are never as bad as you make them out to be in your head.

HOUMJM

Thanks for your post. Hang in there. Am in day 2. Have tried to stay sober waaay more times than I can count. But I clearly remember, this morning anyway, what a great life I did have during a 13 yer stretch sober. I want that back soooo bad.

doggonecarl

Stress? Or fear of sobriety?

You wondered why you can't stop drinking. Because drinking is easy compared to recovery.

But the misery of drinking doesn't get easier.

Dee74

Hi bh

as long as I kept drinking nothing changed - actually thats not strictly true...things got worse.

There's always going to be a reason to drink - but if you want change, you're gonna have to commit to making changes, man.

D

Jwalker

I have to agree with LexieCat. It's about change, not strength of character. I could not do this alone. I had to put down the bottle and call for help. The minute I did, I had an army at my side, and they surrounded me until I could stand on my own. I just had to be willing to listen and follow those who came before me. Whether it is AA, Smart, or ****** -- it doesn't matter. You can do it -

Jwalker

BarrysMama

take that first step..