Leongecko

Hey peeps, I've been caning the beer and wine pretty hard in the last few months, although ive been an alcoholic for a number of years its getting progressively worse again.

Yesterday I took the day off work, due to a hangover (I know, I know) and there were 2 beers in the fridge. I didnt want to drink them. So I started pacing around the house. Then I sat down and made a list of all the stuff I wanted to do with my life which Ive been putting off, I bet some of you have done this as well. I kept going to the fridge and just looking at the beer. Then I got the urge to drink really strongly, and I just tried to analyse that feeling.

In the movie Star Wars, (stay with me) whenever the millenium Falcon is about to jump into hyperspace, they active the hyperdrive and before it Wooshes off, there is a second or so when the stars visible from the cockpit, seem to lengthen, there is this half second of expansion, a kind of bloating and then woosh its off.

My urge to drink felt just like that second before the woosh, but the woosh never comes. It was like a massive increase of inertia that I just couldnt overcome. I just stared into space and zoned out falling deeper and deeper. Does anyone else understand that feeling?

I necked the 2 cans, went out and bought 8 more and 1 bottle of wine, didnt eat any food and spent today throwing up and getting needle feelings on the left and right side of my back under my ribs. not good.

The fridge is full of beer, I havent had any yet, but I will once the nausea has gone. im trying to force some soup down. its getting pretty bad. I have stopped before for over a year, but i just cant seem to get over that first hurdle this time, its like everything stops until i agree with myself to drink.

Know what I mean? (Im not crazy honestly)

Dee74

I know the feeling...and it seems inevitable once the whooshing starts that drinks will be drunk...but it's not. Really.

You could ring someone for support, or post here...if you're a recovery group guy you could hit a meeting.

You could do any one of the great tips here
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html

If that seems impossible to you right now it's ok...iot's natural if you've never once thought to challenge the 'warp drive'.

But you can break the cycle...your addictive self won't like it and will probably be like Chewbacca with a hangover for a while, but you really can change the outcome, Leon.

D

huntingtontx

You know you need to quit. To me, that is end of story. No one will make you buy the booze or drink it. This is up to you. When you want a drink do something else. Don't stare at the beer. Dump it. When you want a drink, take a shower, a walk, go for a drive, come here. There are so many things you can do. The urge usually passes withing a few minutes. Just get busy. For me, it was just don't take the first drink, no matter what. One day at a time, one hour at a time, sometimes a minute at a time. You can do this. All of us here are proof it can be done. We are all here with you. Hang in there.

doggonecarl

I hope you hyperdrive into recovery mode.

Good luck.

gaffo

Not having the beer in the fridge really helps. I hope if you ever get another year of sobriety in that you don't look back. Hangovers suck so bad. I can remember them like yesterday even though it's been 3 years since I had one.

"These aren't the beers you're looking for"

Wholesome

LOL hyperdrive into recovery! That cracked me up!

Hawks

Notice how dissatisfied with life Luke was, eeking out a living working on his uncles farm ?

Then he meets Obi Wan (Oh be one) and learns about the Force.

He goes on to blow up the death star.

Using the Force, good conquers evil.

So Star Wars also explains .... how to over come evil (drink) .... Use the Force

Deckard

Another Star Wars connection.... Yoda's words of wisdom:

"Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try."

True words for recovery.

Johno1967

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...hilosophy.html