Prayers for my family
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2013
Location: North East, US
Posts: 2,310
I wasn't going to talk about it or ever bare the words. However, that might be an unhealthy way of going about things. I'm desperately trying to put pieces together on the loss of my father. He horrifically took his life last week. I can't say that was unfathomable, but I never thought he'd actually do it and not say good bye. He suffered tremendously with chronic back pain (rebuilt spine) and severe depression the last 2 years. I tried to help him get him to retire run away to a little beach town and enjoy the last few decades he should of had.
Initially I thought we should remain hush hush about these events, but the more I talk to people the more I learn how many have been affected by suicide. I will not let his name be covered in shame, rather make it my job to help others with his life and his story. He was a giant, strapping could build or fix anything. And he was the kindest sweetest deep proud man I will ever know.
When one takes there life I believe there is a moment of peace, and a hope that all their pain will go away. But what really happens is all that pain inside the person is only dispersed to those that love them.
Please it's taken me a lot if courage to write this. And if you have negative or damning comments place them somewhere else or keep them in your mind. There isn't much more I can take before I break. I'm very sober and will not be drinking as a means for coping.
Thank you all for your kind words they were little breaths of air I needed!
Initially I thought we should remain hush hush about these events, but the more I talk to people the more I learn how many have been affected by suicide. I will not let his name be covered in shame, rather make it my job to help others with his life and his story. He was a giant, strapping could build or fix anything. And he was the kindest sweetest deep proud man I will ever know.
When one takes there life I believe there is a moment of peace, and a hope that all their pain will go away. But what really happens is all that pain inside the person is only dispersed to those that love them.
Please it's taken me a lot if courage to write this. And if you have negative or damning comments place them somewhere else or keep them in your mind. There isn't much more I can take before I break. I'm very sober and will not be drinking as a means for coping.
Thank you all for your kind words they were little breaths of air I needed!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 20,458
Im, i am so sorry for what you are dealing with. By all means share with us, if it helps you. I hope in time you can find some peace about this, your Dad would not want you to continue suffering either.
Do you have some ftf support? Therapy can help a lot.
Do you have some ftf support? Therapy can help a lot.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,805
Imp, I am so, so sorry for your pain right now and the loss of your dear daddy. And you are right, I don't know anyone who hasn't been touched by suicide in some way or other. There is no shame. We are here for you. ((((((((((((((((((((((((((Imp))))))))))))))))))))) )) Love, prayers and peace.
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
((IM)), so sorry for your deep loss of your Dad. It does take courage to share about all that is happening, and in your sharing we can support your courage and strength. I think you will indeed importantly help many others by way of sharing your fathers true life story which is now a huge part of your own story. Your a brave soul, ImperfectlyMe. 
Prayers and thoughts for you and your family. Please share as much and as often as you feel empowered to share.
Prayers and thoughts for you and your family. Please share as much and as often as you feel empowered to share.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
I think it's a brave and a good thing for you that you make this public and reach out IM.
The wonderful thing about SR is there is so much compassion support and understanding here - I know you'll be wrapped in it
I hope, when you're ready, you'll look in at our grief and loss forum - there are some beautiful touching and helpful sticky posts there.
Grief and Loss - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
thinking of you and your family (((IM))
D
The wonderful thing about SR is there is so much compassion support and understanding here - I know you'll be wrapped in it
I hope, when you're ready, you'll look in at our grief and loss forum - there are some beautiful touching and helpful sticky posts there.
Grief and Loss - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
thinking of you and your family (((IM))
D
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
I'm sorry to say that I know what it's like to lose a loved one to suicide. Yes, you'll live with the pain of his death, but all that was good in your father will live on with you as well. This is a time when giving yourself the tender loving care you need is so important. You've got a good heart, and your concern for others, here and elsewhere, will go a long way in helping you through this most difficult time.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,872
Dear Sweet ImperfectlyMe; I will hold you close today and for many days as you navigate your way without your Father.
I am terribly sorry.
Suicide has affected many lives, many families; you are not alone.
I am terribly sorry.
Suicide has affected many lives, many families; you are not alone.
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