Gottalife

If I could drink like you drink, and moderate like you do, I'd still be drinking. But I'm an alcoholic and it was impossible for me to moderate. There is nothing about your post that I relate to as an alcoholic.

Your sound more like someone who is consuming a bit too much of a substance than is good for you, like someone who eats to much and puts on weight. You don't seem to be having the spirititual, emotional and mental issues that go with alcoholism.

However, for health reasons (alcohol is a class 1 carcinogen like cigarettes) it would be a good idea to stop or moderate. I suspect you would not find that too difficult.

least

Give yourself more than just one month sober. Go for at least three, to get the full effects of lasting sobriety. Some of the benefits of being sober aren't too apparent in the first few weeks or months.

Give yourself three months completely sober and see how you feel then.

fini

yes, i went back right to where i'd left off.

i cannot answer your question about what a "real alcoholic" would do.
i can only tell you i'm an alcoholic and that's what i did.
i also had two pregnancies during the thirty years that i drank, and did not drink then. i have no real understanding how i could do that, but it's quite common/frequent.
which also re-inforced the idea that i couldn't be an alcoholic.
here's what i know:
i drank when i had decided not to. over and over.
i couldn't NOT.
in spite of all commitments and decisions.
i'd plead some nights with a god i didn't believe in to just let me wake up one more morning and i'd never touch the stuff again.
yet, at some point during the next day, somehow there was a point at which i knew a decision had been made somehow to buy the stuff again on my way home from work.
and yes, i know i'm using the passive voice here, but i honestly was not aware of any decision-making process i was going through.
just that the decision was made, and with that, everything was okay. didn't matter if i had to wait til later. i was at peace.

that willpower was neither always in play nor effective when i used it...drove me to despair. couldn't understand it. no willpower problems in the rest of life.

i didn't cheat during those six months because i knew i would get it again later.

but my life and days and mind were pre-occupied with when i'd have the next one all the time.
and i never wanted one, or two. i wanted to get drunk and that was the goal.
you may be nothing like this.

ever read the "more about alcoholism" part of the AA Big Book? i tried most of those things. fits me to a t.

esinger

Sounds like your completely mind ____ing yourself. I'd stop just so I could move on and not worry about it any more. At least that way if you are addicted you've taken care of it. If you aren't you won't slide down the slope. Win-Win

seanblist20

Being an alcoholic is bad neither smoking.

MrDavid

It really depends on what you consider normal. Some people can go and entire week without having a drink. Other people are not so lucky. A person who has an occasional drink or two is less likely to develop a drinking problem. Those who cannot, have a greater chance at becoming an alcoholic.

Best case scenario, you stop drinking for a week or two without any serious consequences. Worst case scenario, you become a full blown alcoholic. It can go either way. The key points to consider: How much you drink and how often you do so.

Alcoholics can be very secretive as well. They may even try to ‘downplay’ their drinking like it’s no big deal. For example, a person who has 5 drinks or more is most likely an alcoholic. Moderate drinkers can usually stop at 1 or 2, without hesitation. Alcoholics cannot. Possible warning signs may include increased consumption, irritability, and strange drinking patterns.

Most alcoholics have an excuse for just about anything. Their excuses range from overly ridiculous to deeply troubling. Statements like “why stop at just one”, “who’s counting anyway” or my all time favorite “One is never good enough so you better make it three” are downright disturbing. They usually indicate a much broader problem. Eventually, things start to break down. Then, reality sets in. After that it’s more of a guessing game. Two things may happen from there; they either sober up for good or become a full blown alcoholic. We choose.

Does any of this sound familiar? If it does, you may be an alcoholic. Again, it really depends on what you consider normal. For example, someone who drinks a pint of booze every single day is most likely an alcoholic. Lesser amounts may vary. Like I said, it’s about the 2 factors mentioned earlier: Frequency and consumption. After that, the decision is entirely ours. I hope you agree. Onward.

airwick

Simple answer: If you think you are an alcoholic, don't drink.
If you don't think you are an alcoholic, don't drink

Can't get any easier then that

(If you are a hard drinker, please see a doctor so this can be done safely )

3arai

I think all the deal making you are doing with yourself and the long descriptions of how much you drank for periods of time are indicative of a problem.

Most people wouldn't have a New Year's resolution to quit drinking.

SoberHoopsFan

You sound like someone who is addicted to alcohol. The justifications are just your addiction making sure it will continue to get its supply. Realistically, why do you want to fight so hard to keep something harmful in your life? You know that alcohol is bad for you, you know it's caused you problems, you know that you are at always at risk of it causing problems if you keep drinking it. So why are you fighting to keep it around? Addiction, plain and simple. The concerns you are having will disappear for good if you quit, and you will never have to worry about them again. Or you can spend the rest of your life addicted and trying to "moderate," whatever that means. In the midst of addiction, I could not (and no one can) see the forest through the trees. When you are free and clear of the drug, the solution to the problems you describe seems far simpler - stop drinking.

bchris02

I agree wholeheartedly that the level of consumption I was at in 2013 was a problem. Even if I wasn't physically addicted, I was drinking way too much and needed to cut back. My weight was a big motivator and I have lost 40 pounds since cutting back. I find not drinking is fairly easy as long as I have a motivator for not. Abstaining simply for the sake of abstaining is a little more difficult. So far, most of the responses here are confirming what I feared. This is either early-stage alcoholism or if its not, I am dangerously close.

TheCure

I can certainly relate to the OP's post. I will happily drink 5-10 pints on Friday and Saturday during the summer months when I don't play field hockey on a Saturday. I'll occasionally pop up the local on a weekday and have 4-5 pints. On weekends when I feel like I am getting hammered I will quite happily switch to shandy because I want to stay out with mates but not get absolutely emulsified. My mates rib me about shandies but I'd rather do that than be sick or pass out. I still get through a load of beer, like I said 5-10 pints on a sesh. I am vey sporty so I'll make some rules due to OCD about weight gain where I will go out and run 6 miles before I have a few beers. This has been going on for 10 years and I do drink more than the average person but it doesn't affect my sporting capability or my job. I come on here and read about people blacking out but I never get the compulsion to drink until I cannot remember and never drink spirits because I hate the next day feeling. I will get up on a Sunday if I have Monday off and get straight on it but only after ensuring I eat first. I reckon when I get older I could easily drink everyday when I can't play sport etc, I am 40 now. I reckon I drink more than I should but I also think I am in great shape and look after myself. I have an addictive personality and used to cane the illegals but had a few bad times and knocked it on the head and never went back. My relationship with alcohol is a weird one to me I can leave it in the week when I know I've had a bender sometimes other times I'll have a 7 day drinking days but then take 4 days off and resume when I feel I've rested enough. I'm coming up for promotion soon so I'll quite happily take a week off so I know I'm on my game when that happens then resume the usual cycle afterwards. Like the OP I wander if I have an issue or whether I am very lucky that I can do what I do for now. My dad smoked and drank 40 a day and 5-8 pints a day all his life and he is still going well now at 60, maybe it's in the genes I dunno.

skg

My experience is that normal drinkers don't ask alcoholics if they're alcoholics...

bchris02

I have seen and taken that test numerous times. That test would probably qualify most drinkers in the USA as alcoholics when clearly that isn't the case. I am sure every normal drinker has at some point drank alone or used alcohol as a social lubricant or even hit the bottle after a traumatizing life event such as a job loss, relationship break-up, or death of a loved one. That quiz is a better indicator of dangerous habits that could put one on a slippery slope to alcoholism if practiced repeatedly.

For me I answer YES to drinking alone, drinking to escape worries and trouble, and feeling remorse after drinking. There was a time where I would have answered a few more of them YES but from the perspective of my current drinking habits, only those three apply.

skg

If you want to drink, that's your business. If you want to stop, AA can help. Good luck in your campaign.

Pagekeeper

I don't know if you are an alcoholic or not ...

But I am one. And I could never stop at 4-5 drinks. I would literally be going nuts if I could not have that 6th, 7th, 8th, 9th, 10th and so on. The pain of not drinking once I started was so intense that if I was in a situation where I could only have a few, than I would not have any. Once I start, I can't stop, not without losing my marbles ...

skg

Good luck in your search. Feel free to question everything, but be sure to be honest in your reasons for asking...

chitownhog

Glad to find this forum and get some opinions. I feel I can relate to some of you on this.

I don't feel I am an alcoholic, but due to a recent trend of more blackout, I'm starting to come to the realization that I have a moderation problem. Yes it runs in my family. My brother is a full blown addict who has been in and out of rehab, while my father has always controlled his better with age, but had very similar instances like me when young.

I'm mid 20s, moved across the country to a big city I knew no one in for a job, and lost said job 8 months later. I felt alone and slightly depressed, but I've never been one to drink during the week. So I'd sulk all week, and go out on weekends just to meet girls and drink. Problem is I'm shy and with only a few friends in town, occasionally that was alone. If I struck out at the bar, I'd just continue to drink and the night would spiral. Also bars would stay open here until 4 than the traditional 2. I'm used to, so the party continued. This has turned into many a black out night, the occasional lost phone/debit card, and yes even a couple arrests. The arrest are way in my past, but the fact is my drinking has gotten me in reckless situations.

Lucky for me, I've landed a new job and things are starting to look up. I don't have the energy to go heavy Friday & Saturday anymore, and the weeknight beer is a rarity. I feel I'm going to always fight the moderation thing, but the fact I never crave alcohol is how I try to justify it.

mystified

I've followed this thread with interest because I've also been thinking "am I?"

Based on what I've read, 'alcoholic' I am not. 'Dependent' absolutely.

My gp tells me that my nightly consumption was 'harmful' but never once during the 20 minute consultation was the word alcoholic mentioned.

Does that mean it's ok for me to drink again?

For me the answer to that question is a resounding 'NO'. One glass of wine leads to three, one bottle leads to two, and if I've not fallen asleep at the bottom of the second I'll be on the spirits.

The post above with the Yes or no questions suggests I am an alcoholic but I'd agree with bchris02 about some of the questions applying to almost every drinker at some stage.

For me the stopping is easy. It's staying stopped that's difficult. Does that make me an alcoholic? Or just dependent?

Just my two cents.

desypete

thats funny as i never see alcoholism in your posts as far as i know it either

i see a lot of people who have a small drink problem compared to alcoholism
they can not be real drunks i say to myself as they have familys and homes and money and computers etc

then i remember its not for me to say anyone is an alcoholic or not as its a dangerous thing to do

so i stop judging if anyone is an alcoholic or not, its down to each person to come to there own conclusion if there an alcoholic or not

Hawks

The late Dr Silkworth wrote an opinion in 1939 as an opening prelude to the book 'alcoholics anonymous '

He worked with 20,000 plus people with alcohol problems from the mild to the most severe.

If you read just that opinion, I think you'll gain some knowledge from a man very very qualified to give his opinion.