poorlouis

Hi all.

So I surprised myself by how well I did with quitting drinking. Today would have been my 5 week milestone. I continued to play in my band sober and even had people over for socials, and all the while, I stuck to club sodas. However, yesterday, I was feeling really depressed. And I got into the whole "Just one drink" mentality. So I headed over to the store and bought myself two gluten free beers in the big bottles. It was football Sunday, so I used that as my excuse. My brother, a raging alcoholic, came over as soon as he heard I was drinking again. I drank my beers, my brother left, but I was not satisfied. The booze had added some colour to the blandness of my life, it seemed. The Universe lit up, just a little... but not enough. So I started into a bottle of Johnny Walker. And then got into my wife's beer. Then from about 8 pm until 10 pm I had to constantly fight the urge to drink more. My wife was shocked when I told her had consumed 9 drinks... most of them by myself on the patio. Why? I never wanted "a beer". I wanted to get pissed all along. And once started, I just wanted to go as far as I could into a stupor... I really don't know why.

Anyway, it is not worth it. I am going back to sobriety. I just can't seem to remain respectable as a drinker. Thanks for listening.

Lou

Celticgirl

You stumbled. It's okay. Today is a new day. Get back on the wagon and look forward, not back.

poorlouis

Thank you, Celticgirl. That's exactly what I intend to do.

ScottFromWI

Glad you caught things before they got really ugly Louis.

You mentioned that you "got into the whole "Just one drink" mentality" . Now that you've re-committed, look back at what you were doing ( or not doing ) that allowed your mind to slip back into that mentality. Is there anything you could do to reinforce your plan daily? Is there something that you were doing that you quit doing? And the end of the day, we can never, ever have just one drink - no matter what.

Soberwolf

Scott speaks the truth

You don't want to drink I believe that I wouldn't worry too much I'm much more focused on that 5 week milestone

Bk on the horse/wagon don't look back its as good as looking down crossing a tightrope with no harness

I would definatly listen to Scott very good advice he gives

Anna

Yeah, the 'just one drink' mentality will lead you in the wrong direction every time. It leaves a door open and I think it prevents recovery. Maybe you could consider staying away from people and places with alcohol for awhile, to help you with your recovery.

Hope2014

Get back on the horse. Keep moving forward. This doesn't erase the 5 weeks sober that you had. Use this as a tool and experience the next time you get a craving. You know what I did? Took a cell phone photo the day after. Refer back to it anytime you think it's a good idea to pick up "just one"....you'll notice a huge difference between a hungover and healthy face.

poorlouis

Lol Great idea!

poorlouis

Thanks. Looking back, the only thing I did was just open the door in my thinking to the possibility of having a drink again one day. I never told anyone I was quitting, only playing it day by day. So I kind of had this mentality of "I'm sober... for now. But I never say never!" The door had been creaking open wider and wider for a few days until I finally gave in. Boredom/depression were the main reasons, I'm sure. Yes, I am more certain than I was before yesterday that "just one drink" is out of the question for me!

PS I play a Gibson SG, myself.

poorlouis

Thanks for the encouragement and insights, everyone. Much appreciated!

Fly N Buy

Tell Johnnie he's got to leave - say goodbye and pour him out!
Glad your rebounding!

An obsession of the mind that leads to the first drink, then physical cravings.....That is my ( and alcoholics ) issue. I needed a plan to remove the obsession of the mind. If I can stay sober watching the Chicago Bears and Cubs, anyone can!! haaaaaa

keep working.....

poorlouis

I poured him down the drain just before reading this (and even the remains of a bottle of Bowmore 12 I'd been clinging to)!

Chicago Bears, eh? Well, let's see if another season of cheering for the thus far championship-less Chargers doesn't test my commitment to sobriety...

PurpleKnight

Once I realised that 1st drink was my real problem, the drink that opens the flood gates, the solution became a whole lot clearer, cut out that 1st drink!!

Go at things again!! You'll get there!!

aborkie

The bottom line is that drinking is way overrated. It's fun for a couple hours and then it's not fun. Furthermore, the next day sucks.

Findingtheway

I don't think drinking is fun at all now. Not after my experiences with it.

jutam

5 weeks sober yesterday. I have stumbled 3 times at this mark. No idea why. thanks for your post. A good reminder to do it differently this time. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off... but don't do it three times like me!!!

knotthead

have been trying to quit but can only get to about 15 hrs then im just uncontrolaby shaking so have to get the booze to stop shaking guess ive got to cut back first and get to the point where i can give it up wow

Gottalife

Sounds like you need to get to a detox or at least see a doctor. A small percentage of alcoholics require medical detox.

Fly N Buy

Great words of Wisdom from a gent who knows.
Well Stuck Scott!

peace to us all

Nocturnal

5 weeks!?!?! Im still working on my 5 day mark.... and failing over and over again.....im a natural born loser...you don't have to be.