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Where are the unicorns and candy?

Old 09-10-2014, 01:24 AM
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Originally Posted by Jason913 View Post
Sometimes you are the statue and sometimes you are the bird
I am never the statue. If I feel that way it means I am taking things to personal.

Things don't happen to just me or even me, they just happen. I am not singled out.

When I get in my pity party I have to look at myself. If the things around me are happening or have happened as a result of my actions and/or my attitude then I go to the mirror.

Candy is available just about everywhere. How about you pick up a bag and stop waiting for it to appear

Unicorns are harder to locate.
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Old 09-10-2014, 05:02 AM
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one reason i never sobered up sooner is because I always felt that those who had sobered up gave me this vibe of sobriety was nothing but candy and unicorns (to use your terms) I always sat around thinking hogwash I call BS thats not true and continued my drinking knowing full well that sobriety would not offer me unicorns and candy like these sober folks made it seem.

The reality was my interpretation of sobriety was skewed. I had to realize there was not going to be this euphoric wonderful existance once i sobered up. I had to put things into perspective and realize that my life would be much better but it wasnt going to be all peaches and sunshine 24/7. I had to learn to handle the ups and downs of life. No matter how up or how down they could be.
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Old 09-10-2014, 05:27 AM
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I used to think being in the moment was sniffing a fat line of coke and throwing my head back as the chemicals mixed in my blood stream. Was this not the essence of being present? Nothing else existed in my little World other than what was right in front of me. I had to change this skewed mindset, as this was unsustainable physically, emotionally and financially.

With time and clarity I can now look back and see this euphoria was little more than lipstick on the pig (of my life). Like a cabby that uses an air freshener to remove the stench of vomit in the back seat there was still the undertone of pain that Iwas attempting to cover through chemicals.

Now I can see that the moments I have craved my whole life are the ones that are real. Its a glance from my wife as we watch our kids develop. Or taking in nature at 11,000 feet in the Rockies. Or just a quiet Sunday mowing the lawn with my son. These moments are becoming more frequent with sobriety and recovery. You get glimpses and want more. Its in the process of just being that I am able to understand this is true happiness - not that fat line or stripper who was fleecing me.
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Old 09-10-2014, 05:37 AM
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Know what you mean, jd. I need to be standing in the Conasauga river.
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Old 09-10-2014, 05:54 AM
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Sorry should have pointed out those moments are the unicorns...they are real and they are magic. But they are just simple points in time.
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Old 09-10-2014, 05:55 AM
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Old 09-10-2014, 06:00 AM
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Sorry should have pointed out those moments are the unicorns...they are real and they are magic. But they are just simple points in time.
yeah you have to realize your in no rush and you gotta stop and smell the roses. I'll go for walks or runs and soak in the view. I'll stop and pick berries or watch some animal do whatever. That sort of stuff is right there for me to soak in and enjoy free of charge. Its right there all i had to do was grasp it.
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Old 09-10-2014, 10:21 AM
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Originally Posted by jdooner View Post


Now I can see that the moments I have craved my whole life are the ones that are real. Its a glance from my wife as we watch our kids develop. Or taking in nature at 11,000 feet in the Rockies. Or just a quiet Sunday mowing the lawn with my son. These moments are becoming more frequent with sobriety and recovery. You get glimpses and want more. Its in the process of just being that I am able to understand this is true happiness - not that fat line or stripper who was fleecing me.
to someone who lost wife and child those moments you describe are very much unicorns and candy. So glad that sobriety opened your eyes.

I thought I was doing sobriety wrong when others spoke of how everything turned sunshine when they got sober, and my life was still my life. ho hum, and with new challenges to boot.

like another said, life on life's terms. Which for me is better than life on alcohol's terms. Had to stop squinting at the horizon, and do today instead.

Yes, it gets better. Times passes and time does help heal. Some people get things restored to them, others get a new beginning, and some get another chance or outlook. Have to find which silver lining belongs to us, I was so jealous of the other guys.
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Old 09-10-2014, 10:27 AM
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This is only in response to the original post.
I was told by an old timer(a person who has hunted deer his whole life) that every buck you get with a bow is a trophy. It doesn't have to be in the record books. It's still a trophy.

I think all wives are trophies too. I have to start preparing dinner for my trophy wife now.
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