Celticgirl

Please don't get me wrong - I know logically this is not true at all, but I have to admit a teeny tiny part of me has always felt that people who don't drink "can't handle it and I can." It's only been in the past few years that I realize how absolutely NOT true that is - how strong people are who refrain. What a condescending attitude I had.

I just turned 50 and realized I have been drinking heavily for over HALF of my life. I'm sitting here shaking my head. I'm also on day four and trying to talk myself out of having a drink. I'm doing all that I can - keeping busy, urge surfing, eating popcorn, drinking water, white knuckling. I'm also playing the drink out - how one is too many and 100 is never enough.

I had a blackout a few months ago (not my first). I went out with some friends I didn't know too well, and had no memory of what happened after a certain point at night. I woke up in the morning, still drunk, and had to drive 25 miles to pick my son up. I am horrified just having to type those words. Thankfully, I was with the mom of one of my kid's friends who made sure I got in my house okay. Good lord.

I should have quit then, but I didn't. So today I am just taking it hour by hour, basically. I just bought about $70 worth of all natural sodas/seltzer/mocktail ingredients so I can get through this holiday weekend sober. This is actually the second Labor Day weekend I will not drink. Last year was the first. Why I started back, I don't know.

Somebody please tell me it gets easier.

Amajorityofone

Sorry but that's nonsense.

I just rode my bicycle 8 miles to the gym. Did 12 pull ups, 15 shoulder presses, 40 push ups, and 100 sit ups. Then I rode my bicycle 8 miles back to my truck.

Did it all in under 90 minutes too.

I don't drink, smoke, chew, or do any drugs of any kind.
Nor do I want to.

If I were to call my old "drinking" friends and ask them to work out with me, every single one of them would be huffing and puffing by mile 4 and quit. And Yes, it does get easier.

Food for thought

ScottFromWI

It gets easier. Keep in mind that you are still on day 4 - and while 4 days is quite an accomplishment, you still aren't even likely out of the acute withdrawal stage. In a few days you should be starting to get over most of the major physical symptoms.

How about getting out of the house a bit - take a walk, go to the library, mow the lawn, anything to get your mind in a different place.

Celticgirl

I know how offensive that sounds - and I know what a ridiculous misconception that is. Of course I have learned that I can't handle it and the only reason I thought I could is because my tolerance was so high, but that didn't stop me from going overboard on a very regular basis.

BTW, I am seriously impressed. I have always been active but I look forward to doing more as time goes on. I plan on making exercise my new high. Last year when I quit I was running five miles three or four times a week on country road near my house and it was amazing. Looking forward to getting back to that all natural high.

aborkie

I think it's the other way around.

Soberpotamus

It does get easier once you have the desire to get and stay sober. It gets easier each time you turn down the urge.

I can relate to what you are saying a little. I remember being proud of the fact I could drink everyone under the table in my early 20's. Ha!! Had no idea what was in store. I was blacking out at age 20 even.

Celticgirl

Hey, Scott - I have a friend coming for the weekend, so I'm going to clean the bathroom and vacuum and do some laundry. Not fun, but busy and I will see results.

When I got home today, I rearranged all the glasses in my cupboards and got rid of a bunch of glassware. I guess subconsciously I'm leaving behind some parts of my old life, but that's good. I need to make a serious change before I do any long-lasting damage.

The good news is that my husband is in this with me. I look forward to us taking this journey together. Even though at times I feel like I'm crawling out of my skin, it doesn't last long. I have read through some of my posts from last year and can hardly believe that was me writing about how good I felt and how much easier it had gotten from the first ten days or so.

Dee74

That's like saying diabetics are inferior to those who can 'handle their sugar'

It is ridiculous...but our addictive selves will use anything - especially our fear of being different, of being outcast and alone - to get us to keep drinking.

Day four is tough. It's early days. It does, and will, get easier Celticgirl

D

Celticgirl

Oh, wait - I'm on day five, not four. So I just gained an extra day there Go me.

Soberwolf

Its gets easier

Dee74

see? it's getting better already...lol

D

aasharon90

I learned that I didn't have to go thru
recovery alone. Having a support system
like here in SR and meeting other folks
at recovery meetings allows me to remain
sober each day just like they are.

People, whether it be 2, 3 or more that
sit together and share their experiences,
strengths and hopes of what their life
was and is like before, during and after
drinking are more likely to be successful
in their recovery.

I learned about my addiction to alcohol
in a 28 day rehab and received some
useful tools, books, knowledge and
suggestions to take with me to use in
my everyday affairs.

I looked to my fellow members that
kept coming back each day to share
with me how they didn't drink that
day beginning in the morning to the
end of the day, for a many days sober
at a time, and followed in their actions
or footsteps.

Before I knew it I had accumulated one
more day sober living a healthy, happy,
honest life with the promises granted to
us as mentioned in the Big Book of AA.

Wilth an open mind, willingness and honesty
you to can live a many days sober too.

whalebelow

I would say the only superior facet of the hard drinker or alcoholic is an incredible flexibility....... We can live life with our heads up our bum, thinking this crappy view of life we have is cool.

Mountainmanbob

seems that once the craving is gone
all is much better

for some the craving is short term - 1 to 6 months
for a few other longer

just from what I have seen and witnessed up close

MM

silentrun

I used to think everyone left the bar drunk. Turns out it was mostly just me and my friends. It gets so much easier Celtic that at some point you will not be able to imagine wanting to go back.