HelloThere1

I've been free of psychotropics now for 5 months after a terrible withdrawal and coming off of antidepressants as well.

This past week I have been feeling really weird. For a while now I've felt sort of like I was dreaming like not fully awake or enjoying things. I feel like stuff is finally cracking through now, but things feel weird and I feel scared.

Like I will have a bunch of crazy things flying through my head like I have to find the answers to everything and everything worries me like even overpopulation and job prospects to health to my own mortality and so forth... Everything becomes really blown up and crazy - almost paranoid.

While this is happening I might feel like I'm losing it or going crazy, and like my consciousness is fading away and being enveloped in everything (if that makes sense?).

Like sometimes emotions crack and flood through that I haven't felt in a long time and it feels super crazy and I cry for like a half hour because I'm scared. I'm scared I'm going to start seeing things or black out or have a seizure or something. I don't want to go on any medications or drugs. Like it's so intense I feel nauseated and like I'm going to black out or start seeing things or something

Sometimes when this stuff happens I get tinnitus really bad and I feel sort of like parts of my brain are shutting down or not working - like I look at something right in front of me and it doesn't register and I feel like I'm losing my grip. I don't want to start seeing or hearing things and be put on more drugs because I really want to FEEL again and FEEL LIKE MYSELF, not subdued

Sounds sometimes sound way more intense and real - like I have a supersensitivity to surprise sound or something, it's hard to explain - like I will be doing an activity and someone will say my name and it sounds way more crisp and "loud" and surprising than it would normally in my dreamy state. I feel scared and jolted by it.

When someone wakes me up from sleep I have a really exaggerated reaction (like someone touches me or there is an earthquake I will SCREAM)

I don't know how to deal with this... Has anyone felt anything similar? Maybe someone has something that will make me feel less scared? Will I have a seizure and die or start seing things and become crazy? I don't like feeling numb but when things flood through all at once I get really freaked out like I'm going to have a seizure or black out or something! Probably unrealistic, but that's why I'm looking for support

dox

HelloThere1,

Welcome to SoberRecovery.

Have you checked out our Mental Health Forum?
You are likely to get more responses and support if you post this there.

At times, I have felt most of the symptoms that you describe.
It's been a long time. So, thanks for reminding me where I come from.
I can say that, in my experience, these difficulties do go away.
For me, paranoia was the last to leave.

The most supportive thing that you can do for yourself, now, is to talk openly and honestly with your Doctor.
Coming off of any psychotropic drug, including antidepressants, should be supervised by a qualified physician or psychiatrist.

Take care,

dox

Dee74

Hi HelloThere

You've posted in our Alcoholism Forum - nothing wrong with that at all, but you may find the response here a little scant

Depends on what psychotropic drugs you were using, but I definitely think the after effects from some drugs can last a long time.

Have you considered seeing a Dr at all?

D

HelloThere1

I don't really want to do any more drugs, including antidepressants or mood drugs because they seem to invariably subdue my good emotions and sex drive, not to mention possible health side effects and so on.

I want to stay off of drugs. In the mental health forum is there a general opinion that drugs are needed for this? I was hoping this would be something that would fade and get better with time

I know sometimes if you feel bad there is a label they give to you like "you have depression" "you have bipolar" "it's underlying condition" "you need this or you have no hope of getting better," but really with these medications I don't feel better... I just feel subdued... But that's beside the point - just looking for support and maybe some experiences

sugarbear1

sounds like me at about 5 months off alcohol and weed, but not quite to the same extent....

might just be your neurons normalizing, we damage ourselves more than we know.

between 10 and11 months, I noticed simple things I had never seen before, that was a mind changing time for me....I was really living in a "fog" when I was drinking and smoking.....

Soberwolf

During my late teens early twenties I was depressed I was on the brink of starting university when I collapsed mentally I was constantly telling the doctors how I felt and yet they kept throwing tablets at me once I said to the doc your not even looking at me I'm trying to tell you what's going on inside my head and you give me a form for tablets ???

That night I relented il give it a try ...

I took the dose stated and woke up in the morning and I couldn't tie my shoelases I had forgot it was down to them tablets and since then i refuse anti D's point blank I know for some this is not an option and I really respect that in your case as you say you don't want to be subdued you want to feel

I think you should maybe talk this over with a trusted doctor and be really really honest the way you have here and hopefully you find a solution/resolution to this

Good luck I'm supporting you all the way