MCAL880

The last time I posted was over 3 months ago, I was determined to stop binge drinking and I hate to say that I have failed miserably. Last night I had a forty of malt liquor and about three or four glasses of wine. A few weeks ago I started to have pains in what seems like my liver area and I am now scared to death that I may be dying of liver failure. Despite my fear of doctors I just scheduled an appointment for Friday in order to discuss this pain and to hopefully get my liver enzymes checked. I'm scared I've done irreversible damage at this point; especially because I have a family history of liver problems, as my dad has fatty liver, my aunt has liver cancer and my grandfather died of liver failure (which may be attributed to working with pesticides on a farm, but no one really knows for sure). Anyways, I hope last nights binge was the absolute last time I put myself through that mess. I've done this off and on since I was 21. I'm emotionally exhausted and so disappointed in myself. Anyways, I'm glad to have found this site again and hope to be more successful in my fight towards sobriety this time around.

rangerdanger

I was also worried about that for a few months so i got blood work done a week ago. I just recently got the tests for my liver enzymes and they were normal, which i was surprised about especially since they were elevated a year and a half ago. I am going to my first aa meeting in a long time today to try and get some help.

MCAL880

rangerdanger- I hope to get the same good news as you did, fortunately I am pretty active and in relatively good shape, so I've got that working for me at least.

huntingtontx

I am glad you are seeing your Dr. He can help you get off the alcohol if that is what you want. You have to really want it. I want to be sober more then I want a drink. I know all I have to do is avoid the first drink. One day at a time you can do this. We are all here with you. Welcome to the sober journey.

Soberwolf

Exactly this

tomsteve

glad ya made it back, MCAL!!
you may be doin all over again, bt im glad yer doin it!
as Huntingtontx said, wanting it is very important.

PurpleKnight

This can be your last time doing this!!

You can do it!!

Hevyn

It's good to see you MCAL. We're really happy you're back.

SoberLeigh

Welcome back, MCAL. Hope all goes well with your doc appointment.

MCAL880

Thanks everyone, I really feel committed to stop this cycle for good. I appreciate all the positive thoughts and well wishes!

downtown3

I was in the same boat as you 11 months ago. Took me six years to get 11 months sober. I was constantly slipping up but dont get down on yourself it happens to everybody. You are already half way there with wanting to stop. It took a complete 180 in my life to stop completely.

You really have to change everything you normally do to get out of the routine which often causes the drinking triggers. Continuing your normal everyday routine and simply saying i am not going to drink is not going to work or at least for me it didnt. I stopped staying up late, started eating healthy, working out religiously. You can read my post about how cycling saved my life for some inspiration. Instead of going out on the weekend stay in, eat well and watch a movie. Go to bed early and get up early. Us drinkers are night owls, early rising is a wonderful way to live especially when you arent hung over. Everything will be easier for you sober - work, family, activities that you use to enjoy. You will have more money in your pocket from not binge buying on amazon or ebay loaded at 2am at night.

Finally enablers are your worst enemy so stop hanging out with those who want to continue to drink. Its sounds harsh but it will be for your own good. Good luck to you and again remember CHANGE YOUR ROUTINE it will save your life!! Good habits are as hard to break as bad ones.