TieTheKnot

I really need to stop drinking. I am still young, in my twenties, and I feel like it is starting to take hold of me. I have tried to stop, but do not seem to have the will-power. I still enjoy drinking.

Can you stop if you know you should, but you still enjoy it?

airwick

I've been sober for 5 months, I love (loved) to drink I stopped, I think it is something that you have to set your mind and body to do. Good luck hun

PurpleKnight

You can stop if it means more to you than continuing to drink!!

freecoffee

Well, lucky for you, you have a few options. First, what you should absolutely do before making a decision if you feel your drinking is getting out of control is take a period of abstinence where you just sort of be yourself. It can be a week, two weeks, a month, whatever, just as long as you sort of chill for a bit and learn how to live without it, then make your choice.

It's a lot easier to avoid drinking if you choose not to than if you tell yourself you can't, because if you get to the "I can't" point, you're undoubtedly gonna drive yourself insane with cravings. If you stick with the "won't" stage, it's a lot easier because it gives you control over alcohol, rather than it having control over you.

After you get over whatever you decide is healthy for yourself, you can decide on abstinence, moderation, or harm reduction. Abstinence speaks for itself. Moderation is like a few drinks a day, or whatever you want your moderation to be, as long as it doesn't defeat your end goal. It's hard, but doable, and takes a hell of a lot of willpower, but just like learning anything, it sucks at first but then suddenly you're not even thinking about it when you're only having two and leaving the bar.

Harm reduction is making better decisions while still choosing to imbibe, such as not drunk driving but getting a cab instead, not buying shots for everyone in a 150 person bar, setting cash limits, making sure people you trust are with you, etc.

As young as you are (and I'm your age and doing this now, after overcoming a massive physical addiction to alcohol), you have plenty of time to grow out of alcohol abuse. In fact, most people just grow out of it without any program.

MIRecovery

I enjoyed the hell out of drinking even though it killing me so yes it is possible.

TieTheKnot

@freecoffee, I feel like I am always striving for that "moderation" drinking. I would like to only drink twice a month, but still end up drinking 1-2 times a week.

I do not drink harmfully (anymore at least) because I generally drink at home, I never drive. I do, however, take the morning after pill way too much because I am not financially or *medically* ready for a child, yet keep having unprotected sex with my husband when we both drink. I also sometimes forget things and cannot remember whole hours on end.

I just hope I can stop when I really need to, before it starts to effect my life severely.


But maybe it has already.

doggonecarl

It still loved drinking when I quit...a 35-year long love affair. I am glad I didn't wait until I hated drinking to quit, it might have been too late to stop.

Mirage74

This is a brilliant question.

freecoffee

Well, one idea if you're trying to moderate is (after said abstinence period, being yourself, etc.) drinking something you usually hate (ie. cutting wine with seltzer water). That way you'll drink less and train yourself to drink less.

But choosing abstinence (again, "won't" vs. "can't") if at least for awhile to figure out a goal is much more productive than just telling yourself you can't because you can't, because all you will ever think about is alcohol.

RobbyRobot

Absolutely you can quit drinking even though you still enjoy it. In fact, no matter how much I hated drinking in my later years, I also still loved it, you know? It wasn't until I was good n sober just under a year that I finally realized I no longer romance a cold one. I'm sober now many years without wanting alcohol.

I quit when I was 24. Young enough I guess. I was a real hot mess. If your telling yourself its time to quit, than by all means follow thru and do yourself a huge favor and quit. You don't need unending will-power to stay quit either, imo. You can quit on whatever reason you want. Staying quit will likely depend on how livable your life is after quitting. It has to be worth the loss of the alcohol, else you'll just return to what you know, even though you know better.

Go for it. I don't regret quitting young.

TieTheKnot

Idk if i can handle some of the stress of life without drinking to be honest. I do not drink everyday, but i drink every week. I like to numb my brain and not think about the horrible crap that life throws at us all. I wish i could handle it on my own, but I honestly do not think I am strong enough

Ken33xx

For me the answer was no.

The problems associated with drinking which started during my early 20's continued until I entered the rooms of AA and put the bottle down at 35.

Only you can decide if you want to quit and some people like myself had to play the drink out.

All during my 20's I enjoyed getting loaded. I just didn't like the negative consequences esp. after I hit 30.

At the end alcohol stopped working and I was sick and tired of being sick and tired.

Good luck.

RobbyRobot

I hear you. Unfortunately, you already have yourself beat before you even get really started with quitting. Your wants and desires, your disbelief on handling life with out alcohol is a setup. Think about that, because the once or twice a week can eventually become everyday. Nothing wonderful about that scenario.

You can become strong enough to deal with life without alcohol. You absolutely can.

Ken33xx

I had plenty going on in my 20's and ******* it all up. Tossed away the opportunities which came my way.

I look at it as two sides of a coin.

On one side I wish I had been smart enough to have stopped when problems first began.

But on the other side I don't have any nagging doubts about my drinking either.

mfanch

I needed to quit when I was 18. I didn't want to until I was 38. Rarely do we quit while there's still time.

Dee74

when I quit it was because I had to. My drinking almost killed me, but I still had the dream of somehow becoming a normal drinker.

Joining this community helped...I kept seeing parts of my story again and again in other peoples posts...and gradually, with some sober time, my perceptions and my goals changed.

I decided I wanted sobriety. I wanted recovery. I never looked back really.

Change is always possible TieTheKnot - give sobriety a chance and see how you feel then

LastMistake

I know I like drinking. But I realize that more often what I was enjoying was being social, seeing friends, staying up late- all things you can do without drinking. As I have read others say, it feels as if, for me at least, one drink is never enough. I'd rather have no drinks than have to have to many.

rhomley

help, i have no idea how to post this right now, i am over 26 years sober, i drank today over three bottles of wine, i a freaking out, have no idea what to do...help...what should i do.....

Pipefish

Hey Rhomley. Things sound tough. If you're new to SR you can post in the newcomer section too, there's lots of support there too.

If it's safe to do so (i.e you haven't been drinking to point where you'd experience withdrawal) perhaps pour any remaining alcohol down the drain & come back & talk to us? There is always someone here. Or depending on your own support system, there may be someone you trust you can call to talk too?

Take it easy on yourself. It is possible to pick yourself up, dust yourself down & begin again. That is after all what you've been doing one day at a time for every day of the past 26 years prior to those bottles. You can do it again.

Take heart. Wish you well

LastMistake

Rhomley

I would say the first thing to do is try not to panic. Try to realize that this one mistake does not define who you are. I agree- if there is any other alcohol around I would get rid of it. I know I wouldn't be able to help myself. Otherwise I would say do your best to relax, maybe take a shower, that always seems to help me. Don't be afraid to reach out for people to listen whether they are on these boards or personal friends.

You are not alone!