dSober

Didn't work for me but good luck with that.

RobbyRobot

Thanks. I'm doing good with what I got relative to where I'm coming from and the journey I'm now living. I hope you too discover what really satisfies. Life is best lived as it happens, rather than fabricated as we go, yeah? Take it easy, dSober.

fini

It is apparent to me that when a fellow human being says something, it should be taken as speculation until more information comes in to reinforce it and make it less speculative.

that would be a tough way to go in the world, for me.
i wouldn't, in effect, believe anything anyone tells me.

wow.

and when i imagine that others might see everything i say as needing further corroboration...no thanks. looks like a horrible world.

but maybe i'm misunderstanding.

Mirage74

I read an article that said it was the cancellation of his show The Crazy Ones, and not Parkinson's, that had recently triggered his depression. He viewed it as a failure and had spoken of the increased difficulty finding good roles at his age. I'm sure that wasn't the sole factor as to why he took his own life, but it had a big impact on him.

Searching for understanding as to why Robin did what he did will always require a degree of speculation. All we can do is piece together what he shared about his struggles. I'm not sure if he left a note. No one has walked in his shoes but him. To understand truly why someone takes their own life would require a collective understanding of their entire life experience interpreted from their perspective. For someone as complicated and gifted as Robin Williams, an impossible task.

LBrain

When I hear of a suicide it always reminds me of the Lou Reed song 'Wild Child'. I know this lyric for forty years and found it quite profound the first time I heard it.

The line "And the way suicides don't leave notes" (as a discussion) always comes to mind. To me this indicates that it is not a well thought out act - usually.

It is beyond explanation or reason what an individual may be thinking at that moment in time. To try to explain or comprehend it is an act of futility. To judge this individual is pointless. No matter how much is speculated, such an act will never be understood completely. I don't know of anyone who has ever committed suicide to be interviewed after the fact.

NightsWatch

One of the best musings I've read on suicide is from David Foster Wallace (who suffered from depression and ended up taking his own life) is that no one WANTS to kill themselves. People who do so feel like there is no better alternative. His analogy was with those people who jumped off the Twin Towers to avoid burning to death during 9/11. Suicide is taking that jump instead of suffering from a worse fate. Does anyone believe those people actually wanted to jump? Just as we are in no position to judge those who jumped, we have no place to judge anyone for choosing to end their own lives, because we simply don't know what other horrors they were facing (real or perceived).

I don't think it matters why Williams took his own life. He was suffering. I think we can all agree on that.

NightsWatch

For the sake of accuracy, I just wanted to say that I looked up the suicide quote from DFW and he doesn't mention 9/11 in particular. I think that was just the first thing that came to my mind when he mentioned jumping out a window because of the terror from flames. In my memory, the two got intermingled.

Mirage74

I read a meme recently that said:

"People who kill themselves didn't want to end their lives, they wanted to end their pain."

Pretty powerful, I think.

RobbyRobot

Yeah. Powerful indeed.

When I held that shotgun in my mouth it wasn't just the pain. It was also the anger I wanted to end. And the helplessness. And the ugliness of the whole rotten deal. I pretty well believed that life shouldn't hurt like it was hurting me. Tough times for me to put behind me. I've moved on and yet you never quite forget where you've been with those darker experiences. Gratitude for being happily alive keeps the memories fresh enough when remembered. Its a beautiful world after all.

MesaMan

The Meme reference above on 'Pain' dovetails with what I was about to post. However, I wanted to stay within 'Newcomer' Thread sensibilities. So, I'll post something different and less 'edgy' here...

We got Rear Ended/slammed the last day of '89 outside Disney World. 2 years followed of intensive Physical Therapy and Legal Battles. There's no 'missing Limb' or disfigurement with Whiplash for a Jury to 'see', so Settlements are/were modest vs. the Lifestyle degradation. A Whiplash Collar on Int'l Flights garners instant Flight Attendant sympathy and endless Whiskey. Plus, those Collars do help you sleep much better than any Inflatable Neck Pillow.

We both used to barely make it Home from Work in time to just lay flat on the Floor and sob. Nerve pain like I can't describe. I seriously bulked up via Weight Lifting figuring that new Muscle would reduce the dependence on existing, scarred, 'shrunken' Muscle that impinged on Nerves. This Strategy worked. Our Physical Therapists, with whom we're still good Friends, said we were the most dedicated Patients they'd ever worked with.

Our Attorney told me that 2 of his Clients ended the pain via Gunshots. The degree of my Single Malt 'Self Medication' was not terribly different than any Story on these Threads. That's a whole other Story. I mention this because self-induced hopelessness via Alcohol vs. Whiplash-induced hopelessness was not terribly different.

I know First Person what real/imagined pain you'd give anything to escape feels like. I wouldn't wish it on my worse enemy. It illuminated and changed forever my POV on 'Selfishness' or 'Cowardice'. I don't second guess.

Either you've been at that abyss of Pain, or you haven't. If you've been there, how you view Suicide is fundamentally different forever, IMO.

dSober

This is not the newcomers' forum; that's here: Newcomers to Recovery - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

This is the alcoholism forum. Substance addiction in general, left untreated, is a fatal disease. It is slow, painful, insidious and all that other 'good' stuff. It is particularly difficult to treat because the only effective treatment has to come from within. I think it's important to discuss even the most unpleasant and difficult aspects of this disease, maybe especially them, because the more openly they're discussed, the more effective treatment will be for all of us, IMHO.

dSober

I woke up this AM, came down stairs and turned on the tube to find "Revolutionary Road", starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet, with a strong supporting role by Neal Bledsoe, showing on HBO. I only caught the second half but I got the drift. A rather striking film on being honest, genuine and courageous... and not.

dSober

Just stumbled upon an other striking film: "Leaving Las Vegas", also halfway through. I first saw it many years ago, many years before I became a "hopeless" drunk. I haven't watched it since because I didn't want to, or couldn't. I'm watching it now. Everybody here that hasn't, should, IMHO.

"Leonard Klady from Variety said Leaving Las Vegas was "certainly among a scant handful of films that have taken an unflinching view of dependency."
- Leaving Las Vegas - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Yes, as Peter Sellers said in "Being There": "I like to watch".