Fast approaching one year
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 5
Fast approaching one year
This is my first time posting, currently I'm 324 days sober and it has been an interesting ride, learning to function sober all the time, not that weekend release that I was doing for a better part of 15yrs.
My question is what should I expect after my one year? So far it seemed to go fairly smooth since I had a goal, but it seem lately I'm tired all the time (more then usual) and dwelling more about the good times. Being a 33yr old single guy its hard that everyone uses and seems good but I'm the one not mature enough to handle it resposibly.
I guess what I just want to know what to expect in the second year? Will my month mood swings start to go away? Will I start to be more content, because some days I'm totally happy, and other days I'm over sensitive. Its that was normal life is? Now don't make me wrong, I am very happy with my current situation, for once in my adult live I'm not living paycheck to paycheck, I don't wake up regreting my night prior (even if everything went good) I feel that I have grown as a person, but I'm feel like I'm still missing out on something.
Thanks for reading.
My question is what should I expect after my one year? So far it seemed to go fairly smooth since I had a goal, but it seem lately I'm tired all the time (more then usual) and dwelling more about the good times. Being a 33yr old single guy its hard that everyone uses and seems good but I'm the one not mature enough to handle it resposibly.
I guess what I just want to know what to expect in the second year? Will my month mood swings start to go away? Will I start to be more content, because some days I'm totally happy, and other days I'm over sensitive. Its that was normal life is? Now don't make me wrong, I am very happy with my current situation, for once in my adult live I'm not living paycheck to paycheck, I don't wake up regreting my night prior (even if everything went good) I feel that I have grown as a person, but I'm feel like I'm still missing out on something.
Thanks for reading.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,435
Hi and welcome tr0uble 
I can only speak from my experience but for me my second year was way better than my first.
If you're tired maybe it's a medical thing? a check up could help
as for social life...I had to find people who were good for my recovery...I had a lot of friendships where the common bond was getting high or drunk but I had to let those go...for me as an alcoholic I needed to find 'normal' people for whom alcohol or getting wasted wasn't an obsession.
you know you're really not missing out on anything. right?
D
I can only speak from my experience but for me my second year was way better than my first.
If you're tired maybe it's a medical thing? a check up could help
as for social life...I had to find people who were good for my recovery...I had a lot of friendships where the common bond was getting high or drunk but I had to let those go...for me as an alcoholic I needed to find 'normal' people for whom alcohol or getting wasted wasn't an obsession.
you know you're really not missing out on anything. right?
D
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Originally Posted by tr0uble 
I guess what I just want to know what to expect in the second year?
probably just more of the same
unless we start taking our sobriety for granted
in these cases most all drink again
have we forgotten how grateful that we are to not be drunk ??
for me that is where the slip always began
Mountainman
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 5
Originally Posted by Dee74
Hi and welcome tr0uble
I can only speak from my experience but for me my second year was way better than my first.
If you're tired maybe it's a medical thing? a check up could help
as for social life...I had to find people who were good for my recovery...I had a lot of friendships where the common bond was getting high or drunk but I had to let those go...for me as an alcoholic I needed to find 'normal' people for whom alcohol or getting wasted wasn't an obsession.
you know you're really not missing out on anything. right?
D
I can only speak from my experience but for me my second year was way better than my first.
If you're tired maybe it's a medical thing? a check up could help
as for social life...I had to find people who were good for my recovery...I had a lot of friendships where the common bond was getting high or drunk but I had to let those go...for me as an alcoholic I needed to find 'normal' people for whom alcohol or getting wasted wasn't an obsession.
you know you're really not missing out on anything. right?
D
Was there anything your learned in year two that you didn't learn the first year? or more of just fine tuning what you experienced?
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,435
I'm not a Dr so I can't tell you if it's PAWs or not...this is a pretty good link on PAWs and what you can do about it tho:
PAWS | Digital Dharma
see if it rings any bells
For me year one was all about not drinking. Year two was about being happy with that decision and preferring to live sober, if that makes any sense
D
PAWS | Digital Dharma
see if it rings any bells
For me year one was all about not drinking. Year two was about being happy with that decision and preferring to live sober, if that makes any sense
D
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: KC MO
Posts: 980
When you quit,as you probably well know. They call it an emotional roller coaster ride. My first year,that's exactly what it was. But after that things started to level out.
I had drank most of my adult life. When I quit everything was new and different. I just didn't really know how to act. But after the first year or so,being sober started to become a routine. Year 2 actually was as you say. "fine tuning' for me.
I wasn't really tired though. I think going to the gym helps with energy level,which is something i started doing not long after I quit drinking.
The main thing I focus on though is to not get complacent. Cravings left me a long time ago. But i still try to keep fresh in my mind the fact that I was in hell. Because there is always some joker ready to shove a beer in my face,and i am only one beer away from going back to hell.
Congrats on a year. The next best thing is year #2
Fred
I had drank most of my adult life. When I quit everything was new and different. I just didn't really know how to act. But after the first year or so,being sober started to become a routine. Year 2 actually was as you say. "fine tuning' for me.
I wasn't really tired though. I think going to the gym helps with energy level,which is something i started doing not long after I quit drinking.
The main thing I focus on though is to not get complacent. Cravings left me a long time ago. But i still try to keep fresh in my mind the fact that I was in hell. Because there is always some joker ready to shove a beer in my face,and i am only one beer away from going back to hell.
Congrats on a year. The next best thing is year #2
Fred
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 5
Originally Posted by Nevertheless
When you quit,as you probably well know. They call it an emotional roller coaster ride. My first year,that's exactly what it was. But after that things started to level out.
I had drank most of my adult life. When I quit everything was new and different. I just didn't really know how to act. But after the first year or so,being sober started to become a routine. Year 2 actually was as you say. "fine tuning' for me.
I wasn't really tired though. I think going to the gym helps with energy level,which is something i started doing not long after I quit drinking.
The main thing I focus on though is to not get complacent. Cravings left me a long time ago. But i still try to keep fresh in my mind the fact that I was in hell. Because there is always some joker ready to shove a beer in my face,and i am only one beer away from going back to hell.
Congrats on a year. The next best thing is year #2
Fred
I had drank most of my adult life. When I quit everything was new and different. I just didn't really know how to act. But after the first year or so,being sober started to become a routine. Year 2 actually was as you say. "fine tuning' for me.
I wasn't really tired though. I think going to the gym helps with energy level,which is something i started doing not long after I quit drinking.
The main thing I focus on though is to not get complacent. Cravings left me a long time ago. But i still try to keep fresh in my mind the fact that I was in hell. Because there is always some joker ready to shove a beer in my face,and i am only one beer away from going back to hell.
Congrats on a year. The next best thing is year #2
Fred
Ryno032709
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Concord
Posts: 103
Every year gets better. The more you work at sobriety the less of a issue and the less thought you have about remaining sober. One day at a time, twenty four hours a day... At year 1 you should be well beyond thinking about what you need to do to remain sober and instead more about things you need to do daily as activities (work/play).
Personally, i changed up my routines frequently and opted for jobs and now a career in work where everyday is different. Doing this keeps me motivated and routinely refreshes my energy levels. I am also careful to get at least 7hours of sleep each night and exercise when possible...
My biggest problem when drinking and in my first year of sobriety was taking on too much at once and then needing a release. I found other ways to get my release also I learned not to spread myself too thin. Doing this helped me to maintain a healthy energy level and also no longer store and release energy when not necessary.
Personally, i changed up my routines frequently and opted for jobs and now a career in work where everyday is different. Doing this keeps me motivated and routinely refreshes my energy levels. I am also careful to get at least 7hours of sleep each night and exercise when possible...
My biggest problem when drinking and in my first year of sobriety was taking on too much at once and then needing a release. I found other ways to get my release also I learned not to spread myself too thin. Doing this helped me to maintain a healthy energy level and also no longer store and release energy when not necessary.
Keeping it simple!
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Surrey, BC
Posts: 3,282
I found the first year to be a lot of change in that year and very up and down. When I got my one year I felt overwhelmed as I didn't feel that I "finished". If that makes any sense.
The second year, things start to settle down more and I was getting back into working and the swing of things.
It is not always easy and life isn't always rainbows and sunshine, but that is just the way it is. I find it is getting easier to use my coping skills and learning to deal with my emotions. Learning to be less judgemental and realizing that not everything is all about me is something I am slowing getting better at.
I can also tell you that the little things most definitely do not bother me like they use to. I mean of course once in awhile they do but not with the intensity they use to. At the end of the day I am sober and that is really all that matters.
Even though I am 2 years I still take it one day at a time and I try to make things as simple as possible.
The second year, things start to settle down more and I was getting back into working and the swing of things.
It is not always easy and life isn't always rainbows and sunshine, but that is just the way it is. I find it is getting easier to use my coping skills and learning to deal with my emotions. Learning to be less judgemental and realizing that not everything is all about me is something I am slowing getting better at.
I can also tell you that the little things most definitely do not bother me like they use to. I mean of course once in awhile they do but not with the intensity they use to. At the end of the day I am sober and that is really all that matters.
Even though I am 2 years I still take it one day at a time and I try to make things as simple as possible.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,785
I was so grateful that I made it to a year that I did not dwell on starting the count into the second.
I was happy, healthy, I had my family, a job, a car and my home. I was pretty grateful to still have all of those.
It sounds to me like you need some action. Faith without works is dead so get busy doing something. Take up a new hobby. Volunteer for something. Start a new exercise.
Something! Getting bored, complacent, taking sobriety for granted and pity parties are to be avoided.
It sounds like you have a lot going for you, get out there and share it with the world. It will not come to you, you have to go grasp it!
I was happy, healthy, I had my family, a job, a car and my home. I was pretty grateful to still have all of those.
It sounds to me like you need some action. Faith without works is dead so get busy doing something. Take up a new hobby. Volunteer for something. Start a new exercise.
Something! Getting bored, complacent, taking sobriety for granted and pity parties are to be avoided.
It sounds like you have a lot going for you, get out there and share it with the world. It will not come to you, you have to go grasp it!
Recovering ostrich
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Tampa Bay, Florida
Posts: 2,551
My experience at 19 months now had been that the first year was good, it was also the slowest year of my life because I also had that one year goal as well and I was working steps.
This second year has been good, faster, no longer working steps but using them and I can tell a difference between me now and me a year ago, if that makes sense. But I still feel like I have a lot more to do, recovery wise. And that is a good thing, I need to keep myself occupied!
This second year has been good, faster, no longer working steps but using them and I can tell a difference between me now and me a year ago, if that makes sense. But I still feel like I have a lot more to do, recovery wise. And that is a good thing, I need to keep myself occupied!
Recovered from Hopeless State
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: New Jersey, USA
Posts: 2,156
Originally Posted by tr0uble
My question is what should I expect after my one year?
Perhaps trying looking here as well. You can 't post there yet (me neither) but you're getting close. You can certainly look.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 132
Originally Posted by tr0uble
Being a 33yr old single guy its hard that everyone uses and seems good but I'm the one not mature enough to handle it resposibly.
Congratulations on one year.
For me the second year was much easier. I was more comfortable in my sober skin.
I felt like I could stop apologizing and start living. Just be normal, I could learn how to be normal.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 5
I'm not a 12-stepper or believe in AA. Sorry if that offends people, just my opinion.
What I meant by missing something is, I guess is direction, what to do next. But I do concer that I need to find more hobbies to keep my mind active and focused.
What I meant by missing something is, I guess is direction, what to do next. But I do concer that I need to find more hobbies to keep my mind active and focused.
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