Am I an alcoholic? Is he?
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 31
Am I an alcoholic? Is he?
Hi all,
This post is going to be really hard for me to write. Perhaps it should be two posts, but I'll just go ahead.
I've been wondering in the last few months if I have a problem with alcohol. I had always been a moderate drinker until a year or so ago when I started a new sport and drinking more was part of the culture of that sport. Now, I drink most days (not today) and if I can limit myself to a couple drinks it feels like a miracle. Last night I probably drank 8 or 9 (light) beers over the course of 5 hours with friends. But over the past 6 months I have gotten very drunk several times. I definitely have fuzzy memory/blackout moments. I've never been a day-drinker but I have had times where I've started at 4:00 or 5:00 in the afternoon--though I don't typically drink late into the night, it's been getting progressively more frequent that I do. I don't like how I feel when I drink, I get terrible hangovers, and even though I'm a fairly happy drunk and usually have a good time, I generally don't like how I act and how much I talk.
I haven't had any really bad consequences yet though I have pushed the envelope with driving and I really don't want a DUI or to hurt someone else or myself. The thing that scares me the most is that I can't seem to take more than a day or a couple days off, and that's usually after a long night (last night). I did not drink today, but when tomorrow evening comes I feel almost compelled to at least have a couple beers or some wine with dinner. That doesn't seem right.
The other piece is my boyfriend. We're long-distance, which has its own challenges, but in the 6 months we've been dating, as far as I know he has drunk every single day. I would say he drinks between a 6-pack and a 12-pack of high-octane craft beer every day. On his days off he stays in bed until 2:00 pm. I just visited him for two weeks and one night he got so drunk that I had to carry him to bed and undress him and everything. I happened to not be drinking for a couple days because I had been sick and was on antibiotics. It scared me, and really got me thinking a lot about him.
He seems to fit all criteria of a Functional Alcoholic. He has a good job, owns his home, is a well-liked, decent guy. He is really gentle and kind as a person, so he doesn't have dramatic personality changes, but he does talk more when he's drunk (he is so quiet, he doesn't talk at all when he's sober) and it does bother me that I get more communication and personality when he's under the influence. He also doesn't eat much. Usually when he comes home from work he opens a beer and has beer instead of dinner. Not always, but often.
I keep thinking about that quantity of alcohol and what it's doing to the inside of his body. I'm scared for him and I'm also scared for myself. I don't want to drink more than I do. I think I drink too much, I'm not sure-- that's why I'm posting, to get some insight. I want to get a handle on this before there are any bad consequences, but I think that because of my own habits, I have no sense of what normal drinking habits/quantities/frequencies are.
If it helps, I am 35, normal weight, been drinking since I was 14 with some periods of light or non-drinking. He is 41, also normal weight, looks much older than I do (I'm told) also been drinking since about 14 or 15.
Thank you so much.
This post is going to be really hard for me to write. Perhaps it should be two posts, but I'll just go ahead.
I've been wondering in the last few months if I have a problem with alcohol. I had always been a moderate drinker until a year or so ago when I started a new sport and drinking more was part of the culture of that sport. Now, I drink most days (not today) and if I can limit myself to a couple drinks it feels like a miracle. Last night I probably drank 8 or 9 (light) beers over the course of 5 hours with friends. But over the past 6 months I have gotten very drunk several times. I definitely have fuzzy memory/blackout moments. I've never been a day-drinker but I have had times where I've started at 4:00 or 5:00 in the afternoon--though I don't typically drink late into the night, it's been getting progressively more frequent that I do. I don't like how I feel when I drink, I get terrible hangovers, and even though I'm a fairly happy drunk and usually have a good time, I generally don't like how I act and how much I talk.
I haven't had any really bad consequences yet though I have pushed the envelope with driving and I really don't want a DUI or to hurt someone else or myself. The thing that scares me the most is that I can't seem to take more than a day or a couple days off, and that's usually after a long night (last night). I did not drink today, but when tomorrow evening comes I feel almost compelled to at least have a couple beers or some wine with dinner. That doesn't seem right.
The other piece is my boyfriend. We're long-distance, which has its own challenges, but in the 6 months we've been dating, as far as I know he has drunk every single day. I would say he drinks between a 6-pack and a 12-pack of high-octane craft beer every day. On his days off he stays in bed until 2:00 pm. I just visited him for two weeks and one night he got so drunk that I had to carry him to bed and undress him and everything. I happened to not be drinking for a couple days because I had been sick and was on antibiotics. It scared me, and really got me thinking a lot about him.
He seems to fit all criteria of a Functional Alcoholic. He has a good job, owns his home, is a well-liked, decent guy. He is really gentle and kind as a person, so he doesn't have dramatic personality changes, but he does talk more when he's drunk (he is so quiet, he doesn't talk at all when he's sober) and it does bother me that I get more communication and personality when he's under the influence. He also doesn't eat much. Usually when he comes home from work he opens a beer and has beer instead of dinner. Not always, but often.
I keep thinking about that quantity of alcohol and what it's doing to the inside of his body. I'm scared for him and I'm also scared for myself. I don't want to drink more than I do. I think I drink too much, I'm not sure-- that's why I'm posting, to get some insight. I want to get a handle on this before there are any bad consequences, but I think that because of my own habits, I have no sense of what normal drinking habits/quantities/frequencies are.
If it helps, I am 35, normal weight, been drinking since I was 14 with some periods of light or non-drinking. He is 41, also normal weight, looks much older than I do (I'm told) also been drinking since about 14 or 15.
Thank you so much.
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He is really gentle and kind as a person, so he doesn't have dramatic personality changes, but he does talk more when he's drunk (he is so quiet, he doesn't talk at all when he's sober) and it does bother me that I get more communication and personality when he's under the influence.
My husband exactly. But that's not why I'm here....
I don't know if you guys have a drinking problem. Only you know. And I think you already know.......
My husband exactly. But that's not why I'm here....
I don't know if you guys have a drinking problem. Only you know. And I think you already know.......
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: WA
Posts: 891
All very familiar. Sounds like the BF certainly has a dependency issue. Not saying he is alcoholic but like myself he drinks to be someone he would like to be, not himself. I tipped the scales into being an alcoholic and that's when the problems really started. Ask him if he thinks he has a problem and gauge his reply. Offer to go out to a Pub or Party one night as you may sometimes do and while there have just two or three drinks and then promptly walk out, go home and drink no more that night. See if you can both do that without too much problem. Leave the car keys at home just in case. I'd say you are on the path to becoming an alcoholic while your BF is on the slippery slope and likely alcoholic. It's a shocking merry go round. The longer you stay on it the harder it gets to step off. Only you and him can decide whether you are alcoholic or not.
Despite your long distance relationship I think you can work together to recover. It would be important in my mind that if he scales back or stops you do so as well. Don't throw stones in glass houses. I can't see how you can insist he not drink if you are not prepared to as well. Not because of him but because by your own admission you have a problem. Often when we are critical of those closest to us we are just projecting out own faults. Good luck and with effort, sincerity, honesty and love you will find a way. Sent from iPhone
Despite your long distance relationship I think you can work together to recover. It would be important in my mind that if he scales back or stops you do so as well. Don't throw stones in glass houses. I can't see how you can insist he not drink if you are not prepared to as well. Not because of him but because by your own admission you have a problem. Often when we are critical of those closest to us we are just projecting out own faults. Good luck and with effort, sincerity, honesty and love you will find a way. Sent from iPhone
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 31
Originally Posted by Johno1967 
I tipped the scales into being an alcoholic and that's when the problems really started.
Originally Posted by Johno1967
Ask him if he thinks he has a problem and gauge his reply.
Originally Posted by Johno1967
Offer to go out to a Pub or Party one night as you may sometimes do and while there have just two or three drinks and then promptly walk out, go home and drink no more that night. See if you can both do that without too much problem.
Plus he would not be on board with not bringing the car keys.
Originally Posted by Johno1967
It's a shocking merry go round.
Originally Posted by Johno1967
It would be important in my mind that if he scales back or stops you do so as well. Don't throw stones in glass houses. I can't see how you can insist he not drink if you are not prepared to as well.
I'm not meaning to criticize him. He's such a wonderful man in so many ways. It's just an issue I have so little clarity on. :/
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Welcome to the site.
I think if you are questioning your intake or worried about it, then it is a problem. Doesn't matter the label you place on it - it is something that is making you worry and feel uncomfortable. Alcohol dependency is progressive and will get worse for those of us who can't stop at one or two.
As someone who has been involved in two long distance relationships, I will never do it again. One of mine ended in marriage/divorce. That marriage was very troubled. We both drank, and he also was using cocaine and marijuana. There was so much dysfunction in that relationship that it could not possibly have survived.
My second LD relationship was just painful. It didn't result in either of us moving, thank goodness. I think the decision to end it would have been made much faster if we were in the same state. It's just difficult to communicate via Skype.
I would not do it again because I couldn't really get to know someone on the phone or during week-long visits. It just isn't possible to know someone under those circumstances. My husband hid his substance abuse when we were together, but I may have known more had I lived closer. No way to know at this point.
If I had to deal with drunken behavior before I moved three states and quit my job and left my friends - I would have never moved.
I think if you are questioning your intake or worried about it, then it is a problem. Doesn't matter the label you place on it - it is something that is making you worry and feel uncomfortable. Alcohol dependency is progressive and will get worse for those of us who can't stop at one or two.
As someone who has been involved in two long distance relationships, I will never do it again. One of mine ended in marriage/divorce. That marriage was very troubled. We both drank, and he also was using cocaine and marijuana. There was so much dysfunction in that relationship that it could not possibly have survived.
My second LD relationship was just painful. It didn't result in either of us moving, thank goodness. I think the decision to end it would have been made much faster if we were in the same state. It's just difficult to communicate via Skype.
I would not do it again because I couldn't really get to know someone on the phone or during week-long visits. It just isn't possible to know someone under those circumstances. My husband hid his substance abuse when we were together, but I may have known more had I lived closer. No way to know at this point.
If I had to deal with drunken behavior before I moved three states and quit my job and left my friends - I would have never moved.
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Join Date: Jul 2014
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Originally Posted by biminiblue
My husband hid his substance abuse when we were together, but I may have known more had I lived closer.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Originally Posted by Mambamama
How would you have known? I see the quantities, maybe there are more consequence than I can see from far away. Am I fooling myself when I say "I don't know what to look for"? Maybe I really do know. First step is accepting that there is a problem?
Had we lived in the same town, he wouldn't have been able to hide it for long - lack of returning phone calls, being high in the morning, long disappearances, consequences such as financial issues and problems with other relationships both personal and professional would have become apparent if we lived closer together. It's easy to hide stuff for a week at a time.
If your guy was falling down drunk once already, be assured that will be your norm if you live with him. Honestly, I would be gone.
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Join Date: Apr 2012
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Mama, on your own drinking I do see some red flags. Some people don't develop a drinking problem until certain periods of their lives, and that was my personal experience. I drank very little in my 20s and 30s but quickly escalated after that. If you think this is you, consider not drinking at all. I did try moderating, sometimes successfully, but my consumption eventually returned to or exceeded my previous level. I think lack of success in moderating is a good test of whether you're an alcoholic.
Your BFs intake is way over recommended levels, but the question is what can you do? Think hard about where you will be in 5 years with him drinking at his current level, or more. Is this a deal breaker for you?
Your BFs intake is way over recommended levels, but the question is what can you do? Think hard about where you will be in 5 years with him drinking at his current level, or more. Is this a deal breaker for you?
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Join Date: Oct 2012
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Posts: 739
Originally Posted by Mambamama
Yes, it is. I want to stop but I can't seem to. I used to be a very light or moderate drinker.
It's a tough thing, to call time on your drinking but with supports that suit you, you can do it.
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
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If alcohol is causing problems in your lives then it's time to make a few changes, regardless of the terminology, be it "alcoholic", "functioning", "problem drinker" it all boils down to the same question, is alcohol starting to affect your life in a negative way?
If so, then changes are needed before things spiral even further!!
If so, then changes are needed before things spiral even further!!
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Southern California
Posts: 120
When I was considering going to AA, I worried if my problem was bad enough to make me a "real" alcoholic. After a while, my drinking escalated to the point where there was no question whatsoever - I was a full-blown alcoholic.
Don't put so much importance on labels - if you're having trouble with drinking and are unable to stop after you've started, then maybe it's time to quit. Drinking problems tend to escalate over time - there's no sense in waiting until it's clear you're an alcoholic before you address the problem.
And yes, your BF certainly seems like he has a problem. Long distance relationships are hard enough without adding alcoholism to the mix - I'd step back and consider whether you really want to continue with it.
Don't put so much importance on labels - if you're having trouble with drinking and are unable to stop after you've started, then maybe it's time to quit. Drinking problems tend to escalate over time - there's no sense in waiting until it's clear you're an alcoholic before you address the problem.
And yes, your BF certainly seems like he has a problem. Long distance relationships are hard enough without adding alcoholism to the mix - I'd step back and consider whether you really want to continue with it.
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For me, I really required the clarity of sobriety to really assess what was going on in my personal life. Do you want to continue a life where alcohol is such a large issue already...whether that be for you or your potential partner?
What do you want your future to look like? Do you want it to look like this...what it is right now?
What do you want your future to look like? Do you want it to look like this...what it is right now?
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Probably look at it a couple different ways.
One way is if alcohol is causing problems in your life,
If you black out,
If you obsess over drinking
If you crave alcohol
If drinking over-rides anything else,
......then perhaps you are an alcoholic. Its impossible to diagnose anyone without a professional hands on, one on one diagnosis. And we as alcoholics love to lie to those that are trying to help us. Thats why we as alcoholics are shunned by society, they think its a matter of will power, they have no clue its a recognized disease by the American Medical Association. Normal drinkers can metabolize alcohol, alcoholics do not metbolize alcohol the same way as normal drinkers. You need to seek medical doctor, because people die coming off alcohol. DT's and Tremors are common, and rarely if ever do you hear the cause of death Alcoholism, its always a health issue, or a car accident, or a fight/brawl, or jaywalking hit by train, or slipped and fall down stairs, or the list goes on to infinitum.
See normal drinkers have a couple feel woozy and stop drinking.
They rarely if ever get completely blitzed drunk.
Hard Drinkers have a health issue, or get their first DUI, and stop or cut back on their drinking all together. Alcoholics cant do this. We had a great time at age 14-18 or 20, but now the problems pile up. We avoid, we lie, we cheat, we steal, we hide booze, we are afraid of life, afraid to pick up the phone, to read the mail. Normal drinkers do not if ever drink alone, they are social drinkers, having a couple sips of wine and putting the 3/4 full glass down and do not think about alcohol at all for the rest of the night. This type amazing me, never could I understand it, but now I completely understand that me as an alcoholic drinker can never do that, normal drinkers can. Me as an alcoholic drinker can never safely consume alcohol in any form at all. This means food with alcohol in it, food cooked with alcohol in it because it does not burn off, deserts with alcohol in it, cold/cough/flu medicine which most always has alcohol in it, candy with alcohol in it, and most of all alcohol in a can or bottle.
One way is if alcohol is causing problems in your life,
If you black out,
If you obsess over drinking
If you crave alcohol
If drinking over-rides anything else,
......then perhaps you are an alcoholic. Its impossible to diagnose anyone without a professional hands on, one on one diagnosis. And we as alcoholics love to lie to those that are trying to help us. Thats why we as alcoholics are shunned by society, they think its a matter of will power, they have no clue its a recognized disease by the American Medical Association. Normal drinkers can metabolize alcohol, alcoholics do not metbolize alcohol the same way as normal drinkers. You need to seek medical doctor, because people die coming off alcohol. DT's and Tremors are common, and rarely if ever do you hear the cause of death Alcoholism, its always a health issue, or a car accident, or a fight/brawl, or jaywalking hit by train, or slipped and fall down stairs, or the list goes on to infinitum.
See normal drinkers have a couple feel woozy and stop drinking.
They rarely if ever get completely blitzed drunk.
Hard Drinkers have a health issue, or get their first DUI, and stop or cut back on their drinking all together. Alcoholics cant do this. We had a great time at age 14-18 or 20, but now the problems pile up. We avoid, we lie, we cheat, we steal, we hide booze, we are afraid of life, afraid to pick up the phone, to read the mail. Normal drinkers do not if ever drink alone, they are social drinkers, having a couple sips of wine and putting the 3/4 full glass down and do not think about alcohol at all for the rest of the night. This type amazing me, never could I understand it, but now I completely understand that me as an alcoholic drinker can never do that, normal drinkers can. Me as an alcoholic drinker can never safely consume alcohol in any form at all. This means food with alcohol in it, food cooked with alcohol in it because it does not burn off, deserts with alcohol in it, cold/cough/flu medicine which most always has alcohol in it, candy with alcohol in it, and most of all alcohol in a can or bottle.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 31
Well, I just don't know. I'm going forward with what newwestdork said-- the label doesn't matter. My drinking is making my life something that I don't like, so it's time to make a change. Here are the things that I do/have done that worry me:
*I have been drinking more than 20 years, took my first drink at 13 and loved it.
*I drink to excess-- blacking out (often), throwing up (rarely) and I always have.
*I lose entire days to hangovers, always have.
*I crave alcohol, especially in certain situations and certain times of day. 4:00-6:00 pm is the key time.
*I drink then drive.
*I have had a drink WHILE I drive on a few occasions-- a couple beers on a long highway drive usually, and sometimes when I'm driving through town.
*I drink before I go places where I know there will be more alcohol
*For over a year, I have drank just about every day. I would say 375 out of the last 400 days. Some days small amounts, 2-3 beers, and some days excessively.
*The frequency of binge/blackout episodes is higher than it's ever been. It used to be once a year, now it's almost weekly or every other week.
*I've not gone (until now) more than one full day without drinking in the last year.
*I don't like how I act when I drink, even though other people don't seem to really mind. They call me a happy drunk.
*I have tried to cut back in the past with little (no) success.
*I'm scared when I think about not drinking for the rest of my life.
Whether I'm an alcoholic or just a hard drinker that needs to scale back, I'm not sure. I'd love to be where I was a few years ago where I could keep an open bottle of wine in my house that would go bad because I wouldn't finish it. But even then I had binge drinking and blackout episodes. So I don't know. I wish I could drink normally.
All that said, I went to my first meeting yesterday. Two, actually. The first one was really weird, but the second one was right during the hard time for me. People were wonderful, they knew that I was new and they talked about the First Step and their experiences, and how they knew they needed to stop. They "looked like me"-- professional, more polished, articulate. I don't mind the diversity, but it's easier to understand my problem when I see more like me-- never went to jail, able to think deeply about their problems, etc.
Anyhow-- woke up this morning for the second day in a row (first time in a long time) with no residual alcohol in my system. Ironically, I have a headache and a stuffy nose, but I slept with the windows open so I'm sure it's just that.
*I have been drinking more than 20 years, took my first drink at 13 and loved it.
*I drink to excess-- blacking out (often), throwing up (rarely) and I always have.
*I lose entire days to hangovers, always have.
*I crave alcohol, especially in certain situations and certain times of day. 4:00-6:00 pm is the key time.
*I drink then drive.
*I have had a drink WHILE I drive on a few occasions-- a couple beers on a long highway drive usually, and sometimes when I'm driving through town.
*I drink before I go places where I know there will be more alcohol
*For over a year, I have drank just about every day. I would say 375 out of the last 400 days. Some days small amounts, 2-3 beers, and some days excessively.
*The frequency of binge/blackout episodes is higher than it's ever been. It used to be once a year, now it's almost weekly or every other week.
*I've not gone (until now) more than one full day without drinking in the last year.
*I don't like how I act when I drink, even though other people don't seem to really mind. They call me a happy drunk.
*I have tried to cut back in the past with little (no) success.
*I'm scared when I think about not drinking for the rest of my life.
Whether I'm an alcoholic or just a hard drinker that needs to scale back, I'm not sure. I'd love to be where I was a few years ago where I could keep an open bottle of wine in my house that would go bad because I wouldn't finish it. But even then I had binge drinking and blackout episodes. So I don't know. I wish I could drink normally.
All that said, I went to my first meeting yesterday. Two, actually. The first one was really weird, but the second one was right during the hard time for me. People were wonderful, they knew that I was new and they talked about the First Step and their experiences, and how they knew they needed to stop. They "looked like me"-- professional, more polished, articulate. I don't mind the diversity, but it's easier to understand my problem when I see more like me-- never went to jail, able to think deeply about their problems, etc.
Anyhow-- woke up this morning for the second day in a row (first time in a long time) with no residual alcohol in my system. Ironically, I have a headache and a stuffy nose, but I slept with the windows open so I'm sure it's just that.
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 3,359
Originally Posted by Mambamama
Well, I just don't know. I'm going forward with what newwestdork said-- the label doesn't matter. My drinking is making my life something that I don't like, so it's time to make a change. Here are the things that I do/have done that worry me:
*I have been drinking more than 20 years, took my first drink at 13 and loved it.
*I drink to excess-- blacking out (often), throwing up (rarely) and I always have.
*I lose entire days to hangovers, always have.
*I crave alcohol, especially in certain situations and certain times of day. 4:00-6:00 pm is the key time.
*I drink then drive.
*I have had a drink WHILE I drive on a few occasions-- a couple beers on a long highway drive usually, and sometimes when I'm driving through town.
*I drink before I go places where I know there will be more alcohol
*For over a year, I have drank just about every day. I would say 375 out of the last 400 days. Some days small amounts, 2-3 beers, and some days excessively.
*The frequency of binge/blackout episodes is higher than it's ever been. It used to be once a year, now it's almost weekly or every other week.
*I've not gone (until now) more than one full day without drinking in the last year.
*I don't like how I act when I drink, even though other people don't seem to really mind. They call me a happy drunk.
*I have tried to cut back in the past with little (no) success.
*I'm scared when I think about not drinking for the rest of my life.
Whether I'm an alcoholic or just a hard drinker that needs to scale back, I'm not sure. I'd love to be where I was a few years ago where I could keep an open bottle of wine in my house that would go bad because I wouldn't finish it. But even then I had binge drinking and blackout episodes. So I don't know. I wish I could drink normally.
All that said, I went to my first meeting yesterday. Two, actually. The first one was really weird, but the second one was right during the hard time for me. People were wonderful, they knew that I was new and they talked about the First Step and their experiences, and how they knew they needed to stop. They "looked like me"-- professional, more polished, articulate. I don't mind the diversity, but it's easier to understand my problem when I see more like me-- never went to jail, able to think deeply about their problems, etc.
Anyhow-- woke up this morning for the second day in a row (first time in a long time) with no residual alcohol in my system. Ironically, I have a headache and a stuffy nose, but I slept with the windows open so I'm sure it's just that.
*I have been drinking more than 20 years, took my first drink at 13 and loved it.
*I drink to excess-- blacking out (often), throwing up (rarely) and I always have.
*I lose entire days to hangovers, always have.
*I crave alcohol, especially in certain situations and certain times of day. 4:00-6:00 pm is the key time.
*I drink then drive.
*I have had a drink WHILE I drive on a few occasions-- a couple beers on a long highway drive usually, and sometimes when I'm driving through town.
*I drink before I go places where I know there will be more alcohol
*For over a year, I have drank just about every day. I would say 375 out of the last 400 days. Some days small amounts, 2-3 beers, and some days excessively.
*The frequency of binge/blackout episodes is higher than it's ever been. It used to be once a year, now it's almost weekly or every other week.
*I've not gone (until now) more than one full day without drinking in the last year.
*I don't like how I act when I drink, even though other people don't seem to really mind. They call me a happy drunk.
*I have tried to cut back in the past with little (no) success.
*I'm scared when I think about not drinking for the rest of my life.
Whether I'm an alcoholic or just a hard drinker that needs to scale back, I'm not sure. I'd love to be where I was a few years ago where I could keep an open bottle of wine in my house that would go bad because I wouldn't finish it. But even then I had binge drinking and blackout episodes. So I don't know. I wish I could drink normally.
All that said, I went to my first meeting yesterday. Two, actually. The first one was really weird, but the second one was right during the hard time for me. People were wonderful, they knew that I was new and they talked about the First Step and their experiences, and how they knew they needed to stop. They "looked like me"-- professional, more polished, articulate. I don't mind the diversity, but it's easier to understand my problem when I see more like me-- never went to jail, able to think deeply about their problems, etc.
Anyhow-- woke up this morning for the second day in a row (first time in a long time) with no residual alcohol in my system. Ironically, I have a headache and a stuffy nose, but I slept with the windows open so I'm sure it's just that.
Congrats to you on the 2nd day of the rest of your life!
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Posts: 383
It sounds like what you're searching for is a more objective measure. Try this screening test from the National Institutes of Health (link below).
What are symptoms of an alcohol use disorder? - Rethinking Drinking - NIAAA
This is a valid and reliable measure that can help you decide for yourself if you have a substance use problem. If you find your results confirm your suspicions, there are many resources that you can link up with for treatment. Just remember that if it turns out you have a substance use problem, you are not a bad person - you're a sick person and there are plenty of treatment options
What are symptoms of an alcohol use disorder? - Rethinking Drinking - NIAAA
This is a valid and reliable measure that can help you decide for yourself if you have a substance use problem. If you find your results confirm your suspicions, there are many resources that you can link up with for treatment. Just remember that if it turns out you have a substance use problem, you are not a bad person - you're a sick person and there are plenty of treatment options
Working-cl*** pseudo tough
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Manitoba, Canada
Posts: 485
Hey Mama,
Good luck with this. Your description of your "symptoms" were similar to mine, and I am also a polished, professional person who seems to have it together.
Although we like to convince ourselves we are just heavy drinkers, and not "problem" drinkers, if we feel we are drinking too much, then we really know the answer, don't we?
Regardless, glad you're two days sober - keep it going.
One thing that let me know I may be an alcoholic was a very simple two part questionnaire:
Are you an alcoholic?
a) You don't know when to stop drinking - Yes/No
b) You don't know when to not start drinking - Yes/No
If you answered yes to either of the above, you're an alcoholic. In my case, I answered yes to both.
Good luck with this. Your description of your "symptoms" were similar to mine, and I am also a polished, professional person who seems to have it together.
Although we like to convince ourselves we are just heavy drinkers, and not "problem" drinkers, if we feel we are drinking too much, then we really know the answer, don't we?
Regardless, glad you're two days sober - keep it going.
One thing that let me know I may be an alcoholic was a very simple two part questionnaire:
Are you an alcoholic?
a) You don't know when to stop drinking - Yes/No
b) You don't know when to not start drinking - Yes/No
If you answered yes to either of the above, you're an alcoholic. In my case, I answered yes to both.
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