Old pastimes lost to you?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 125
I'm still in early sobriety, but my experience has been a little different. I'm re-discovering hobbies and activities that I used to like. Reading, golf, fishing and cycling come to mind as things I couldn't enjoy when I was drinking, but am getting back into. I'm trying hard to fill my time (and my head) with healthy activities and exercises, and trying out all sorts of new things as well: ukulele, chess, crossfit, disc golf etc.
I don't gamble as much, as that is sort of associated with drinking in my mind, but I still play cards once a week with friends. I'm eating out less, I think, which is both good and bad.
Day by day.
I don't gamble as much, as that is sort of associated with drinking in my mind, but I still play cards once a week with friends. I'm eating out less, I think, which is both good and bad.
Day by day.
Omnivore
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Winter Water Wonder Land
Posts: 516
Originally Posted by SoberJennie 
I used to sit on my back porch and admire the yard, watch the cats play, and swat at insects... I've found that I don't really enjoy doing that anymore. I will go out there if we have company over, or if we're eating breakfast together, or if my husband has just cut the grass or I weeded the garden areas in order to have a look. But just sitting there... for hours. Nope. I used to sit there with a bottle of wine and my stemless wine glass in hand. And just get drunk. Just doesn't hold the same appeal anymore.
Originally Posted by nancylee
Hi,
How long are you sober? When I smoked, I couldn't imagine enjoying dinner out, or sitting round the campfire not smoking. After a few weeks, I didn't even notice. And after I quit drinking, I couldn't imagine sitting around the campfire not drinking, or enjoying a meal out. Now I truly enjoy my tea out by the campfire at night, and my club soda with lime or Virgin Mary at dinner.
And my husband and I still talk about the Virgin Coladas we had two years ago on a brutally hot day at the Atlantis in the Bahamas. It was the best drink we ever had, and the best part was it didn't leave us hot and fuzzy.
You will get used to not drinking and be able to enjoy your nature again. Actually, you'll enjoy it more. For now, maybe bring a sketch pad out with you and sketch the birds (it doesn't matter if you can't draw! It's just for you!) and trees. And an iced tea or hot tea that you love! I love the lemon or raspberry! Your Addictive Voice is messing with you here. Just ignore it and carry on.
Best,
Nancy
How long are you sober? When I smoked, I couldn't imagine enjoying dinner out, or sitting round the campfire not smoking. After a few weeks, I didn't even notice. And after I quit drinking, I couldn't imagine sitting around the campfire not drinking, or enjoying a meal out. Now I truly enjoy my tea out by the campfire at night, and my club soda with lime or Virgin Mary at dinner.
And my husband and I still talk about the Virgin Coladas we had two years ago on a brutally hot day at the Atlantis in the Bahamas. It was the best drink we ever had, and the best part was it didn't leave us hot and fuzzy.
You will get used to not drinking and be able to enjoy your nature again. Actually, you'll enjoy it more. For now, maybe bring a sketch pad out with you and sketch the birds (it doesn't matter if you can't draw! It's just for you!) and trees. And an iced tea or hot tea that you love! I love the lemon or raspberry! Your Addictive Voice is messing with you here. Just ignore it and carry on.
Best,
Nancy
BTW I also wonder if I'll ever enjoy a vacation again. I recall vacation being getting permission to drink all day. Laying around the pool or beach, drinking all day. I don't imagine I'm going to enjoy hanging at the pool or beach all day if I'm not drinking. Maybe I will? As I said I cut the grass sober and it was fine.
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: The Deep South
Posts: 14,636
Yeah, I see that being outside in that setting is ok now if I'm involved in an activity. With the wine, I'd just zone out. Zoning out, getting in my head and staying there... that's just not a good place for me. I am preferring to be involved in more "activities" now with a set beginning, middle, end sort of thing. I'm so introspective and internalize things so easily, that I see in sobriety it's just healthier for me to kind of pace myself in an activity with a goal in mind, and a time limit 
Woe is Moo.
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
Is there maybe other thing, like social activity or games or exercise that is better sober? Maybe focus on these thing for while and come back to sitting by pool or porch when you more settle with new sober self. I total understands. I has mountain cabin, and wide sky porch is open all day, every day, for sitting and sipping. But also, I ride off road motorcycle, and is not something you can do drunk (trust me, I try). I go on very rough old mining road yesterday and I rock that road and was think several time, "Could never do this if weak and hazy from drinking."
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Pacific Coast
Posts: 785
Originally Posted by Cow
Unfortunate to me, and career, writing and drink very much intertwine. I not feel like write when sober, is like funky creative circus has leave town and is just boring ploopy elephant sit there. Can write for hour and hour on 'the juice' --and is not drunk hack material either, was great stuff. Now is laborious and take forever.
Unfortunately, it was simultaneously burning out the circuits it was enhancing, kind of like running too much current through a light bulb will briefly cause it to shine brighter before burning it out. Now, writing is laborious and slow and I often can't get my thoughts to coalesce, or find the words to express them when they do.
However, if this is part of the price I must pay for sobriety, I do so willingly. There is more to life than having a facile brain.
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Does anyone have innocent things they used to do that they no longer can or want to do?
Don't listen to the radio while driving anymore. I actually prefer silence.
Woe is Moo.
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
SJ, yesterday was family of 6 tiny chipmunk on picnic table bird bath. I had peanuts out there for blue jay but chipmunks was delighted to find them. I never see chipmunk so happy. They nibble peanuts up, so I go to put more out for them, but they just total cusses me up one side and down other with they shrill squawks and chirpings. Was like, just leave the peanut and go bitch!! Was hilarious. And other thing I not think I appreciate in full if I was boozy.
Andante, yes. Is something I still gonna has to come to term with. Is lot at stake for me, with career and monies. But at end of day, that nothing compare to having actual sober, healthy LIFE, yes? Yes. But is still so hard.
Andante, yes. Is something I still gonna has to come to term with. Is lot at stake for me, with career and monies. But at end of day, that nothing compare to having actual sober, healthy LIFE, yes? Yes. But is still so hard.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: West Tn
Posts: 3,043
I still do almost everything I did when I was drinking (going to car races, concerts and football games, driving through the mountains, shooting guns, running, etc.).
Now, though, there is less involvement on the part of the law enforcement and medical communities (you know, drunken trips to the ER).
Now, though, there is less involvement on the part of the law enforcement and medical communities (you know, drunken trips to the ER).
Omnivore
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Winter Water Wonder Land
Posts: 516
Originally Posted by Boleo
Can't watch TV news anymore. Too much violence and gossip.
Don't listen to the radio while driving anymore. I actually prefer silence.
Don't listen to the radio while driving anymore. I actually prefer silence.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Upstate NY, in the Adirondacks
Posts: 232
Originally Posted by walkbeformakrun
SJ - this is so me. It is exactly what I'm feeling. But see below from Nancylee. That sure sounds great. I hope it can happen for me.
Thanks NL. I guess I should try it more than once, right? lol. I'm only sober now for bit shy of 4 weeks and only sat on my porch sober once. I'll try it again.
BTW I also wonder if I'll ever enjoy a vacation again. I recall vacation being getting permission to drink all day. Laying around the pool or beach, drinking all day. I don't imagine I'm going to enjoy hanging at the pool or beach all day if I'm not drinking. Maybe I will? As I said I cut the grass sober and it was fine.
Thanks NL. I guess I should try it more than once, right? lol. I'm only sober now for bit shy of 4 weeks and only sat on my porch sober once. I'll try it again.
BTW I also wonder if I'll ever enjoy a vacation again. I recall vacation being getting permission to drink all day. Laying around the pool or beach, drinking all day. I don't imagine I'm going to enjoy hanging at the pool or beach all day if I'm not drinking. Maybe I will? As I said I cut the grass sober and it was fine.
Hang in there - I'wish I could show you how good life gets, but if you have faith in those who walk a bit ahead of you, and hang in there, you will find out for yourself very soon! I promise.
Nancy
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 2,775
Originally Posted by ScottFromWI
The only thing I'm not able to do anymore is drink alcohol. Prior to quitting, I drank all the time, no matter where I was or what I was doing ( except for work ) - so pretty much my entire life was directly associated with drinking.
Other than hanging out in bars or actuallly drinking alcholol, i've been able to participate in pretty much every activity I did while I was drinking, and most of them I can perform and enjoy better. Additionally, being sober has opened up a plethora of new ones.
Other than hanging out in bars or actuallly drinking alcholol, i've been able to participate in pretty much every activity I did while I was drinking, and most of them I can perform and enjoy better. Additionally, being sober has opened up a plethora of new ones.
Well said.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Vashon WA
Posts: 1,035
I did a lot of good writing when I was drinking but not so much when I was drunk and of course one leads to the other. Now that I have some sober time in I can write again. The inspiration isn't as earth shattering but I can power through the hard parts without getting too drunk to write anymore. Does that make any sense? There was a fascinating part of a Biography channel show about Hunter Thompson where a former editor was talking about HST's writing and drinking and it was actually pretty sad how he depended on it as a muse but it was really drowning his talent.
Many of the things that I used to enjoy while I was drinking were boring and simple minded and I am glad to be done with them. Sobriety has made me realize that life is short and I don't want to waste any time shooting pool, watching cartoons with grownups, holding down a bar stool, or any of the other stupid crap that I used to enjoy while I was drinking or hungover.
Many of the things that I used to enjoy while I was drinking were boring and simple minded and I am glad to be done with them. Sobriety has made me realize that life is short and I don't want to waste any time shooting pool, watching cartoons with grownups, holding down a bar stool, or any of the other stupid crap that I used to enjoy while I was drinking or hungover.
Omnivore
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Winter Water Wonder Land
Posts: 516
Originally Posted by gaffo
Many of the things that I used to enjoy while I was drinking were boring and simple minded and I am glad to be done with them. Sobriety has made me realize that life is short and I don't want to waste any time shooting pool, watching cartoons with grownups, holding down a bar stool, or any of the other stupid crap that I used to enjoy while I was drinking or hungover.
However, I don't think anyone would say it is a good thing that I no longer enjoy sitting on the beach by my house to watch the sun set. Sunsets are beautiful. Something my mother instilled in me when I was a small child. I remember sitting with her watching them and being fascinated with their fantastic beauty. No two the same. Now I fidget and think, yes, nice, but so what! I guess maybe it comes down to I need to learn to relax and be inactive, without a drink to help me stay inactive.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Brooklyn, ny
Posts: 734
The things that you loved doing before you can learn to love again but it will take time. I loved sitting on my back deck smoking and drinking wine until after dark. Even found the sweet spot where the neighbors in adjoining yards couldn't see me. I avoided the back yard the year I quit smoking. Hated it. Now after looking forward to a year without drinking and three without smoking, I do enjoy my backyard again. I've taken the time to made it a sanctuary. To love it. It's where I have my morning coffee and read the news and SR. Sometimes on a beautiful night I'll stay out again till after dark. Just hanging, no props. And yes I think sometimes wouldn't it be great to have that perfect combination again ( wine and a cig). But all it really did was make my mind agitated and open that unfillable void I kept trying to fill. It's baby steps but all is possible.
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