alwayssober1

I'm so depressed right now, I'm 6 months sober but I couldn't care less, my tinnitus has worsened this week, a new obnoxious noise has been added to the orchestra that I can hear everywhere!, I just want some beer and relax! Sigh, I'm being honest here, sobriety doesnt feel like a priority anymore, I feel like drinking kept me sane!

Drinking won't help my situation but nor will being sober!

jdooner

What is your program?

PurpleKnight

It's true neither will help, but alcohol will make things worse!!

Waking up with a hangover and in the same situation as now, with all the feelings you'll feel as a result will be worse, sure drinking will provide a short term escape, but it will never be a long term solution, it's not going to be worth throwing 6 months away!!

Think of the reasons why you got Sober, those reasons are still valid reasons 6 months later!!

You can get through this!!

Stoogy

Hey AlwaysSober, you were one of the very first people who I shared my backstory with as we are round about the same time sober and I know you have had a rough time of late, but please think twice before going down that same old road again, if I thought it would help I would do it too but we all know it will just highlight any depression you feel right now and will make you hit an all time low, you are better than that AlwaysSober.

alwayssober1

The reason I'm thinking of drinking again is because I've had tinnitus for 2 years, only now I'm sober I feel I can't cope, drinking kept me calm, all the negative thoughts disappeared etc, I don't think I could feel any worse than I do now!

LadyBlue0527

Feeling a bit of this myself right now.

I don't feel like it kept me sane but I equated it with pressure release. It was my "who gives a crap anyway" juice. We can do this though! Know that you're not alone. This will pass. It's a mere moment in time of a life that will get better as long as we don't pick up.

Nuudawn

Hey AS1...I am thinking there are more proactive remedies to tinnitus than alcohol? I honestly don't know all that much about the malady other than it can be brought on by severe serotonin deficiency. As you mention depression, I'm wondering if this could be part of the problem.

Are you in any sort of recovery treatment. Have you spoken with your doctor about the depression. Are you on any SSRI's or every investigated any?

What are you doing for your self care? I would love to hear more about you.

Waterfalls2014

Hi Always, I hope you don't give in. It's your AV. You can overpower it! Remember the reasons you quit drinking. And most important, even tho you don't feel it today, remember how proud you feel to say you have 6 months sober. Try not to throw those precious words away. Hang in there. Best wishes!

Boudicca

I too suffer from a severe case of tinnitus. I totally understand the frustration and isolation brought about by this neurological condition. Oddly enough, my drinking made it MUCH worse....
That said, being sober and present we are much more AWARE of the tinnitus than we may have been when drinking.
Don't lose heart....understand that drinking will not help the tinnitus. You'll just be drunk and then have to deal with the guilt on top of it.

I understand.

jdooner

The reason you are thinking of drinking is because you are an alcoholic not because of the tinnitus. I don't dispute the effects of the tinnitus but your goto coping mechanism has been alcohol. So again, what program have you crafted to create new coping mechanisms to deal with the tinnitus?

Can you see how you are destined to relapse without creating a new program to cope?

Hawkeye13

One small suggestion is a CD / download of nature sounds like falling rain or surf.

I play these for relaxation, but I was interested to find that many people suffering
from your condition also use them to good effect--

I don't think drinking will help anything in the long run.
You do need to build other coping mechanisms to deal with this
I'm sorry it is so difficult.

alwayssober1

Sorry for all the negativity, it's just been a horrible few days.

With tinnitus it can be lower in volume and your doing swimmingly, all is good, motivated to stay sober......but then it spikes in volume were I can hear it everywhere, even in the shower and a feeling of panic and dread just comes over me, all rational thinking just goes out the window! With panic I look for relief, your right alcohol was my goto drug, being a recovering alcoholic while suffering with tinnitus is like a double whammy!

I'm scared to go on medications because I read some antidepressants make tinnitus worse.

I'm going to try and get through the next week without giving in, I so hope my tinnitus calms down!

Sorry for freaking out, i just needed to tell someone how I'm feeling, hopefully theres better days ahead!

Ghostly

Don't be sorry. Many of us here drank to cope with various issues, and we get it.

When I quit I made an electronic journal of sorts and kept things in it that were reasons to stay sober. I re-post this quote from it every months or so when I feel it may be appropriate, and it was something that helped me.

Boudicca

You did right to come on SR and share with us! No apologies necessary.....tinnitus is scary sometimes! About the meds: everyone is different. Some people report improvement on antidepressants, some report deterioration. YMMV. The most important thing is to get evaluated by a physician at some point. You don't have to take meds if you don't want to. Eventually, however, you have to compare the risk of taking the med with the potential benefit (Your life not sucking because of tinnitus.)

I did not respond to medication......my tinnitus is so bad now I have trouble following conversations and watching TV. You may have wonderful results....

Keep checking in and let us know how you are doing.

alwayssober1

Thanks for your reply,

Can I ask, does your tinnitus greatly bother you?

Has there been times where you have wanted to drink again because of your tinnitus?

Dee74

Hey AS

If drinking worked you wouldn't have signed up here, man.
I understand that you feel like you've seen everyone and no one can help, but that's not true.

Sometimes you have to see multiple Drs, multiple hearing specialists, maybe even a therapist or two.

I also think you could be doing a lot more for your recovery.

Posting here every so often doesn't seem to be making you any happier and that's the object of recovery - to be happy.

There are other options than drinking - yeah they involve a lot of work and patience... but they won't take you back there to that dark place.

Make some good choices.

D

Sudz No More

Have you tried running a fan next to you? It may mask the ringing when you are sitting in a quiet room. Another thing you could try is headphones with an out of tune radio when you sleep. This white noise may prove less distracting than the ringing in your ears.

The only thing you can do is try to find remedies to lessen the discomfort. Hope you find some help to make it more bearable

GreenColor

I have very mild tinnitus from 10 years of playing in loud rock bands. I sleep with a fan next to me and it does the trick for me. I found that the tinnitus was worst after a night of heavy drinking.

Boudicca

Yes, my tinnitus is horrible and has negatively affected my life. To say it bothers me is an understatement, LOL! Having to constantly ask people to repeat themselves, being unable to watch TV or enjoy music....I actually have to read lips now!

However, tinnitus is not hearing loss so many of the remedies available to the hearing impaired will not work for me. I have suffered with tinnitus since @ 13 years old so it predates my drinking..........however, I believe my years of alcohol abuse made it much, much worse!
I must say that I have never wanted to drink again because of my tinnitus. I wanted to drink again because I was physically dependent on alcohol, LOL.

The drinking just makes matters worse and the guilt and shame I would feel is simply not worth the temporary, illusory relief that I "think" I would get from drinking. The juice simply isn't worth the squeeze anymore.

alwayssober1

Thanks again, I'm sorry your also dealing with this sh*tty condition! I can really sympathise!

I got to keep telling myself drinking will only make it worse! Alcohol isn't an option anymore!