Derby day
quat
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,823
Derby day
Going to a Derby party today, actually bought a seersucker sport coat for the event needless to say I will be quite the dapper dandy. It has been fun planning outfits , spent the day yesterday acquiring accessories and festooning my wife's hat. I have been generally looking forward to this social event and then I cut the grass. That particular chore takes a few hours of mower riding, the thinking soon ensued.
My BP is still in place and operable, but I feel less enthusiastic about the prospect of enjoying my time at the event. While mowing I conjured quite a few hypothetical conversations and how they may play out. The first were with family members and An assumption that they will start with snippets of sympathy and expressions of what I want to term as "misplaced " pride. Expressing pride in my length of sobriety or some such, while I understand the basic intent of such sentiments and see them as coming from a genuine positive perspective, I just hope I hold my tongue and resist a diatribe that may produce uncomfortable feelings in them.
I just hope if such comments come that I will smile and say thanks , but I can just as easily imagine more than one family coming to me drink in hand and sanctimoniously congratulating me on refraining from drinking and me responding poorly .
My problem with having such a big lawn is that I tend to think too much and perhaps over think. But just wanting to drop a line and hopefully without sanctimony share that some problems are better others. I would much rather worry about having to hold my tongue than my liquor . Though reading this over suggests I may have to devote next week's cut time to ponder if I need to worry what others think , and why it seems to be a concern.
Wish me luck, and the BP is in place, just don't want to be a rude bore
My BP is still in place and operable, but I feel less enthusiastic about the prospect of enjoying my time at the event. While mowing I conjured quite a few hypothetical conversations and how they may play out. The first were with family members and An assumption that they will start with snippets of sympathy and expressions of what I want to term as "misplaced " pride. Expressing pride in my length of sobriety or some such, while I understand the basic intent of such sentiments and see them as coming from a genuine positive perspective, I just hope I hold my tongue and resist a diatribe that may produce uncomfortable feelings in them.
I just hope if such comments come that I will smile and say thanks , but I can just as easily imagine more than one family coming to me drink in hand and sanctimoniously congratulating me on refraining from drinking and me responding poorly .
My problem with having such a big lawn is that I tend to think too much and perhaps over think. But just wanting to drop a line and hopefully without sanctimony share that some problems are better others. I would much rather worry about having to hold my tongue than my liquor . Though reading this over suggests I may have to devote next week's cut time to ponder if I need to worry what others think , and why it seems to be a concern.
Wish me luck, and the BP is in place, just don't want to be a rude bore
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
I love dressing up! Sounds like it could be a fun time. It also sounds like your beast hopped on the mower with you.
Don't worry about things that haven't happened yet. Or about things that likely may never happen. Mowing sounds like a great time to meditate and practice bringing your mind back to the now each time it wanders. Always back to the now. To this moment.
Don't worry about things that haven't happened yet. Or about things that likely may never happen. Mowing sounds like a great time to meditate and practice bringing your mind back to the now each time it wanders. Always back to the now. To this moment.
quat
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,823
You have no idea how many of the world's problems I have solved when mowing!lol Great time for thinking
Definately beast rumblings yesterday, I guess what surprised me was the way it felt like the self psycho/analysis seemed to sneak up on me, it almost felt like an ambush. Drinking wasn't an issue or even remotely on the table, but the resentment sure played itself out with projecting and hypotheticals.
We had a marvelous time , my sister the gracious hostess, very caringly and discreetly showed me where she was hiding the 'sugar' Pepsi, and all other allusions to my sobriety through "So... how are you doing..?" were easily dismissed and appreciated for what they were, genuine shows of affection and concern.
Had there been voting we would have placed first in the best dressed category. We stopped at our local store on the way , to pick up sundries and the staff and customers got such a kick out of our outfits, it was very fun.
Thanks for the vent.
Definately beast rumblings yesterday, I guess what surprised me was the way it felt like the self psycho/analysis seemed to sneak up on me, it almost felt like an ambush. Drinking wasn't an issue or even remotely on the table, but the resentment sure played itself out with projecting and hypotheticals.
We had a marvelous time , my sister the gracious hostess, very caringly and discreetly showed me where she was hiding the 'sugar' Pepsi, and all other allusions to my sobriety through "So... how are you doing..?" were easily dismissed and appreciated for what they were, genuine shows of affection and concern.
Had there been voting we would have placed first in the best dressed category. We stopped at our local store on the way , to pick up sundries and the staff and customers got such a kick out of our outfits, it was very fun.
Thanks for the vent.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
I'm so glad you had a great time! Aren't those genuine gestures of affection amazing? Sometimes I get so wrapped up in my thoughts/feelings, I forget that there are people who care about me, who are rooting for me, who want me to succeed and be happy. It's a lovely feeling, and I try to do it for others as they've done for me. I am atheist, so don't believe in supernatural powers, but I do absolutely believe in the power of human connectedness. It's what miracles are made of.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
did you wear a bonnet? glad things went well for you.
I'm concerned about the pending "Belmont Annual Excursion". Stay in Manhattan and take the train out to Belmont. It has always been nothing but a drinking contest. Well for me at least...
I'm concerned about the pending "Belmont Annual Excursion". Stay in Manhattan and take the train out to Belmont. It has always been nothing but a drinking contest. Well for me at least...
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
Dwtbd
Haha I do love me some Flying Spaghetti Monster! and while I enjoy the concept of pastafarianism, I could never subscribe because some see the satirical nature of it as mockery. I would never want to be seen as mocking another's beliefs. That would go against my belief in human connectedness. I follow the Buddhist teaching of "Do no harm, but take no sh*t"
Ok, so that's not exactly what the Buddha said...
Haha I do love me some Flying Spaghetti Monster! and while I enjoy the concept of pastafarianism, I could never subscribe because some see the satirical nature of it as mockery. I would never want to be seen as mocking another's beliefs. That would go against my belief in human connectedness. I follow the Buddhist teaching of "Do no harm, but take no sh*t"
Ok, so that's not exactly what the Buddha said...
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