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-   -   The decision process ..... (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/alcoholism/330884-decision-process.html)

karate 05-02-2014 08:03 AM

The decision process .....
 
Why could not the same decision process apply to drinking ,as it does for other immoral things we decide to NOT do?

It seems ,the process could be applied to not drinking ,There are a lot of things I just wont do ,no matter what .

suki44883 05-02-2014 08:06 AM

Maybe you're not addicted to those other things.

ScottFromWI 05-02-2014 08:06 AM

You've already tried that and it didn't work - please read your post history if you need a reminder. If it were that simple there would be no need for recovery forums/groups.

GracieLou 05-02-2014 08:13 AM

No reason you can't. Go do that and come back and let me know how it worked out.

Thanks!

seahorse661 05-02-2014 10:24 AM

It seems to be that easy for heavy drinkers and non-alcoholics. If they have a good enough reason, they simply make a decision and quit.
Me, well, I guess I made that decision weekly for years, and I completely meant it at the time. My addiction didn't allow me to follow through on the decision. Until I accepted that it needed action as well as decision, I had no chance of success

karate 05-02-2014 10:42 AM

But I have taken quite a bit of self improvement action ,in the last year .

I would give the credit to some smart authors ,who wrote great books

1-Richard Caelson

2- Wayne Dryer

3-Dale Carnegie

In No order of best to worst , Likley spent more time reading Richard Carlson .

Oddly he died of a heart attack early in life ,The fellow was a blessing in my life .

I hope he is enjoying his well deserved walk on the streets of gold .

I have been very lucky also to have some great people to influence me as well ,
Boss ,great coworkers/friends ,and good friends outside of work .

My home group of AA people ,are great as well .

My non -aa friend ,14 months sober .

Fellow farmer -aa er ,3 years sober .

So I have a great support system .

Raider 05-02-2014 10:49 AM

Well I think you do. I do anyway.

GracieLou 05-02-2014 10:53 AM


Originally Posted by karate (Post 4627348)
But

Famous last words.

Listen, do what you want.

You ask questions or give scenarios and we give you our personal experience of what has happened when we tried it. That is all we can really do.

karate 05-02-2014 11:02 AM


Originally Posted by GracieLou (Post 4627357)
Famous last words.

Listen, do what you want.

You ask questions or give scenarios and we give you our personal experience of what has happened when we tried it. That is all we can really do.


A support system is here too .

ScottFromWI 05-02-2014 11:05 AM


Originally Posted by karate (Post 4627348)
But I have taken quite a bit of self improvement action ,in the last year .

I would give the credit to some smart authors ,who wrote great books

1-Richard Caelson

2- Wayne Dryer

3-Dale Carnegie

In No order of best to worst , Likley spent more time reading Richard Carlson .

Oddly he died of a heart attack early in life ,The fellow was a blessing in my life .

I hope he is enjoying his well deserved walk on the streets of gold .

I have been very lucky also to have some great people to influence me as well ,
Boss ,great coworkers/friends ,and good friends outside of work .

My home group of AA people ,are great as well .

My non -aa friend ,14 months sober .

Fellow farmer -aa er ,3 years sober .

So I have a great support system .

I have to say I'm really unclear on what exactly you are proposing Karate. In your original post you suggested that perhaps just using a morality based decision making process to keep you from drinking. Then above you list a plethora of support resources that are very much above and beyond a morality based decision. Are you suggesting you are going to throw out all the above support and just go back to using your morals?

EndGameNYC 05-02-2014 11:07 AM

Being smart, being a nice guy, praying, being well-read, being well-educated, being successful in love and work, accumulating wealth, paying your taxes, meditating, showing up on time, being a good spouse, being a good parent, being a good friend, being a tough guy, running marathons, giving of yourself to the point of personal depletion, going to church, being a genius, helping other people, collecting stamps, practicing yoga, reading the AA Big Book or the Bible (or any book), winning the lottery, being in love...if any of these things were sufficient for us to achieve sobriety, and then to remain sober, there'd be no writing on this page.

karate 05-02-2014 11:07 AM

We shall see , if I make it .

Im betting on myself -of course :)

Its no different than a diabetic not eating sugar ,or someone with high BP giving up salt .

As an added benefit ,my digestive system has improved a lot .

If things turn crappy ,Ill go to doc and get back on Zoloft .

It worked for a couple years ,Until I did not need it .

I feel like I have my attitude right ,doing good .

I sat down and figured up a 6 pack a day ,that's 200$ a month WOW , yet another reason .

karate 05-02-2014 11:10 AM


Originally Posted by ScottFromWI (Post 4627377)
I have to say I'm really unclear on what exactly you are proposing Karate. In your original post you suggested that perhaps just using a morality based decision making process to keep you from drinking. Then above you list a plethora of support resources that are very much above and beyond a morality based decision. Are you suggesting you are going to throw out all the above support and just go back to using your morals?

Im saying im going to use ALL the tools I have ,Not one in place of the others -ALL of them .

An inventory of support ,and reasons to not drink .

If this were placed in a court case ,the trial lawyer would certainly win.

If my home group were not so far away ,id attend faithfully .

There is a group closer ,but I don't "click " with them as much .

deeker 05-02-2014 11:10 AM

karate

in the last 3 days you have gone from saying one day you don't go to AA meetings,on another post that you are going to be a speaker at an AA meeting soon, On another post to being afraid to go back to AA and today you claim to have an AA home group.

Really ???

GracieLou 05-02-2014 11:11 AM


Originally Posted by karate (Post 4627373)
A support system is here too .

Telling you our experiences is support.

ScottFromWI 05-02-2014 11:13 AM


Originally Posted by karate (Post 4627382)
Its no different than a diabetic not eating sugar ,or someone with high BP giving up salt .

It's actually completely different. Diabetics are not addicted to sugar, and those with high BP are not addicted to salt. You are addicted to alcohol- and apparently you haven't accepted that yet.

karate 05-02-2014 11:19 AM


Originally Posted by deeker (Post 4627391)
karate

in the last 3 days you have gone from saying one day you don't go to AA meetings,on another post that you are going to be a speaker at an AA meeting soon, On another post to being afraid to go back to AA and today you claim to have an AA home group.

Really ???

I do claim my home group ,still I don't attend ,But still talk to one of the old timers on a regular basis .

So I hope its not a violation of ethics to claim them as my home group .

Its the old timer at my home group that wants me to speak .

In the past ,most of the time when it came time to share ,Mine would be some research I had done ,or how the research I had done effected my life .

I don't think id go as far as calling myself well read , But I do research.

Its my other addaction ,and it is not going away .

karate 05-02-2014 11:21 AM

You may never been around someone with blood sugar issues .

But the peaks and valleys ,are similar to drinking ,buzzed ,hungover .

It depends on diet that day ,or actually in the last hour .

And im this crazy on ZERO mind altering substances ,Imagine me drunk :)

suki44883 05-02-2014 11:22 AM


Originally Posted by ScottFromWI (Post 4627397)
It's actually completely different. Diabetics are not addicted to sugar, and those with high BP are not addicted to salt. You are addicted to alcohol- and apparently you haven't accepted that yet.

Have to agree with this 100%. Giving up something you aren't addicted to may be a bit difficult, but it can be done without crippling withdrawals and such. You are (I think) trying to give up alcohol, to which both your body and your brain are addicted. It's not the same thing at all.

My ex-husband was diabetic, so I do know a bit about it.

FeenixxRising 05-02-2014 11:28 AM


Originally Posted by karate (Post 4627121)
Why could not the same decision process apply to drinking ,as it does for other immoral things we decide to NOT do?

That's one of the concepts behind AVRT. For problem drinkers, the desire to drink is an inappropriate and self-indulgent behavior. Since the behavior is destructive, the problem drinker will make the Big Decision: "I will never drink/use again, and I will never change my mind". Any thoughts or feelings that go against that decision is your Addictive Voice. Here's what I've found: once I recognize my Addictive Voice, it simply melts away, usually in a few seconds.

However, it can be tricky identifying the AV as it's often stealthily hidden in normal thoughts and feelings we have all the time. But with practice, recognizing the AV, even when it's just a hint of a thought or a feeling, becomes almost effortless.


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