rbotlove

I have this friend who I drink with, whenever we hangout we get drunk. I've known him for a while now we met on a psych ward, so we both have our issues. We share a connection and when ever we are together we have a great time. I'm just concerned about our relationship after I come home from rehab. Is it possible to still maintain a relationship with someone when it usually revolves around drinking?

Spinach

Depends if you had any other shared connections or dreams! If not then NO.
What would you think your friendship be based around if you didn't drink.
John

FeenixxRising

I have many friends who drink normally, and I have no issues socializing or remaining friends with them. However, our relationships are based on many things, and having drinks together, was always a very small part, inconsequential part of the equation.

If your relationship with this individual revolves around alcohol and drinking you will--at the very least--need to find things other than alcohol to base an ongoing relationship upon.

doggonecarl

Your post title, Drinking Buddies, says it all. The line above confirms it.

What would happen if you told this person, "Listen, I'm coming out of rehab, I'm committed to sobriety. I'd like to see you, but there can be no alcohol. I'm not saying you have to quit drinking, but I am saying that when we're together...it's alcohol free."

Friends won't find this an issue.

Taking5

I found when I sobered up that a lot of my "friends" were just drinking buddies from the bar we went to. Most of them want nothing to do with me sober. I had to change my playground (bars) and playmates (from drinking buddies to AA members) to achieve lasting sobriety.

karate

My non -aa friend I posted about several times .

We have a mutual friend that still drinks beer , but not around my friend now .

Nevertheless

I still consider most all of the folks I used to drink with close friends. If they need something I will do whatever I can to help.
But the first year or so,I just couldn't be around them. All we ever did was party,and for me it was a huge trigger.
And now that I have been sober for a few years. I realized while I still consider them close friends. The only thing we had in common was pursuing a buzz.
Like they say in AA. We need to change playgrounds ,and playmates.
Just my opinion...... Fred

Tamerua

Depends...when you're out, tell him what you're dong. Maybe you will inspire him. But obviously the basis of your relationship will have to change.

Aiko

Dear rbotlove

I would personally ask him to abstain and explain you are in recovery.
Is not a good idea to hang out with him drinking.
If he loves you he will respect it.

You can meet for a coffee, lunch, going to cinema, museums, etc.
But AVOID BARS!!!!

Hope you recover,
big Hug,
Aiko

Nuudawn

Do you have a desire to spend time with him if alcohol is not part of the equation? Do you think it may be a trigger for you? Do you think his company would still be enjoyable stone cold sober?

Raider

It's way too early for me in sobriety to be around alcohol even at almost three months. I don't know if I will always be this way, but if I am, I can accept it.

karate

Get offered beer after work often .

I just tell co workers ,my system cant handle alcohol anymore .

Its true and a simple answer