I can't wrap my head around this...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 245
I can't wrap my head around this...
Losing everything a year and a half AFTER you stop drinking?
Can someone please explain this to me? Is this more common than people like to let on? Or am I just one of the "lucky" ones?
Can someone please explain this to me? Is this more common than people like to let on? Or am I just one of the "lucky" ones?
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: California
Posts: 195
Non-drinkers and normal drinkers have ****astic things happen to them, too. There is simply no way around it. Hopefully becoming sober allowed some REAL friends and loved ones into your life to lean on through your hard time.
Last edited by Dee74; 04-30-2014 at 04:14 PM.
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 245
When I say I lost everything, I mean EVERYTHING. All I have is my questionable car, my daughter, the clothes on our back and about $60 in my bank account. My family turned their back on us. We are on day 4 of homelessness. I had it in my head that rock bottom was something that happened before you quit drinking.
Please just don't start drinking again. It will make everything so much worse.
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
I doubt that quitting drinking was directly the cause of your experiences, life keeps dealing the cards whether we are drinking or not.
However I do know that alcohol and turning back to drinking won't help the situation!!
However I do know that alcohol and turning back to drinking won't help the situation!!
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 245
Originally Posted by purpleknight 
I doubt that quitting drinking was directly the cause of your experiences, life keeps dealing the cards whether we are drinking or not.
However I do know that alcohol and turning back to drinking won't help the situation!!
However I do know that alcohol and turning back to drinking won't help the situation!!
Its_me_jen
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
I'm sorry for what you're going through RocketQueen. I can't even imagine.
In most ways my life improved after I got sober. I did come closer than ever to loosing my job about 6 months into sobriety.
My boss said your fired, I countered, he realized I was right, he told me he had to talk to corporate and think it over. He let me know 2 days later that I was not fired. So, I spent two days not knowing. That was tough. Nothing like what you're going through but it was tough.
Just know, lots of folks here (and in the world) have been in similar situations and things got better. It is possible.
Sending you and your daughter love and hugs.
In most ways my life improved after I got sober. I did come closer than ever to loosing my job about 6 months into sobriety.
My boss said your fired, I countered, he realized I was right, he told me he had to talk to corporate and think it over. He let me know 2 days later that I was not fired. So, I spent two days not knowing. That was tough. Nothing like what you're going through but it was tough.
Just know, lots of folks here (and in the world) have been in similar situations and things got better. It is possible.
Sending you and your daughter love and hugs.
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 245
I understand things still being shaky for a small period of time after quitting. Kind of a transitional period. I get that, and experienced it myself. This just seems so extreme. A year and a half later, I should have regained control of my life. In fact, I was making progress in doing just that. Then, BAM! What happened?? I wish I knew.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Essex
Posts: 411
Am sorry things are tough for you & your daughter RQ.
A very dear friend of mine, now 18 years sober, found out after 18 months in recovery that her husband had been having an affair for several years, and as a result, lost her home, any financial claims, and had to leave her sons with their father. She arrived in the UK with two hundred quid & pure determination to stay sober. She's done just that.
Since getting sober on the 16 December 2013, I've lost my job (made redundant), have needed to bring to an end two long friendships that served no purpose on either side, (well, one ending was initiated by me, the other by the other party, in a very abrupt & blaming way) have needed to sell my home to make financial ends meet (tho am very fortunate to be moving somewhere I like) and also managed to lose a year long relationship. Am trusting this is all part of the plan...this doesn't compare to your situation, but I can empathise a little.
Have always been a little dubious about the vague use of the term 'it gets better' What's been important to me is to muster as much faith as possible that these changes are a necessary part of my recovery, clearing the way as it were, and ironically, it gives me hope. If we can have sobriety under these conditions, then it's possible under any other kind....especially better ones ;-)
Huge hug to you
A very dear friend of mine, now 18 years sober, found out after 18 months in recovery that her husband had been having an affair for several years, and as a result, lost her home, any financial claims, and had to leave her sons with their father. She arrived in the UK with two hundred quid & pure determination to stay sober. She's done just that.
Since getting sober on the 16 December 2013, I've lost my job (made redundant), have needed to bring to an end two long friendships that served no purpose on either side, (well, one ending was initiated by me, the other by the other party, in a very abrupt & blaming way) have needed to sell my home to make financial ends meet (tho am very fortunate to be moving somewhere I like) and also managed to lose a year long relationship. Am trusting this is all part of the plan...this doesn't compare to your situation, but I can empathise a little.
Have always been a little dubious about the vague use of the term 'it gets better' What's been important to me is to muster as much faith as possible that these changes are a necessary part of my recovery, clearing the way as it were, and ironically, it gives me hope. If we can have sobriety under these conditions, then it's possible under any other kind....especially better ones ;-)
Huge hug to you
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,373
I'm sorry RQ.
I don't think these things happen to us because we're sober...sometimes life is just...well rough.
I won't give you advice, but I will send you best wishes...you will come out of this
D
I don't think these things happen to us because we're sober...sometimes life is just...well rough.
I won't give you advice, but I will send you best wishes...you will come out of this
D
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 245
Originally Posted by Pipefish
Am sorry things are tough for you & your daughter RQ.
A very dear friend of mine, now 18 years sober, found out after 18 months in recovery that her husband had been having an affair for several years, and as a result, lost her home, any financial claims, and had to leave her sons with their father. She arrived in the UK with two hundred quid & pure determination to stay sober. She's done just that.
Since getting sober on the 16 December 2013, I've lost my job (made redundant), have needed to bring to an end two long friendships that served no purpose on either side, (well, one ending was initiated by me, the other by the other party, in a very abrupt & blaming way) have needed to sell my home to make financial ends meet (tho am very fortunate to be moving somewhere I like) and also managed to lose a year long relationship. Am trusting this is all part of the plan...this doesn't compare to your situation, but I can empathise a little.
Have always been a little dubious about the vague use of the term 'it gets better' What's been important to me is to muster as much faith as possible that these changes are a necessary part of my recovery, clearing the way as it were, and ironically, it gives me hope. If we can have sobriety under these conditions, then it's possible under any other kind....especially better ones ;-)
Huge hug to you
A very dear friend of mine, now 18 years sober, found out after 18 months in recovery that her husband had been having an affair for several years, and as a result, lost her home, any financial claims, and had to leave her sons with their father. She arrived in the UK with two hundred quid & pure determination to stay sober. She's done just that.
Since getting sober on the 16 December 2013, I've lost my job (made redundant), have needed to bring to an end two long friendships that served no purpose on either side, (well, one ending was initiated by me, the other by the other party, in a very abrupt & blaming way) have needed to sell my home to make financial ends meet (tho am very fortunate to be moving somewhere I like) and also managed to lose a year long relationship. Am trusting this is all part of the plan...this doesn't compare to your situation, but I can empathise a little.
Have always been a little dubious about the vague use of the term 'it gets better' What's been important to me is to muster as much faith as possible that these changes are a necessary part of my recovery, clearing the way as it were, and ironically, it gives me hope. If we can have sobriety under these conditions, then it's possible under any other kind....especially better ones ;-)
Huge hug to you
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