workingtheday

I recently stopped drinking (16 days ago) and have been doing ok all things considered. I don't get the shakes, sweats, night terrors, etc. My only withdrawal symptom I've ever noticed is some anxiety, and the first 2 or 3 nights its difficult to sleep, then that passes. Just a brief history, I am 39, have been drinking since my early 20's. Through the majority of my 20's and early 30's I was more of a "social" drinker. Probably in the last 5 years or so did my drinking elevate. In that time, the last 5 years, I have had periods where I haven't drank at all, months at a time. When I do drink now (up until recently, 16 days ago), it is in the range of nightly, 1 1/2 bottles of wine, or 1/2-1 pint of liquor. Either or, not both.

Getting to my inquiry, I'm wondering what happens to our bodies, our minds, or both when we "relapse". Now my question is very specific. What I'm asking is, I stop drinking for 2 weeks or a month, I "relapse" and one night I have 4 drinks (this is hypothetical), I then don't drink again for an indeterminate amount of time. May be a month, may be never again.

What I'm wondering is, what is it that happens to us physically and mentally (or chemically) that is the biggest concern of a relapse? Is it not so much the example I gave...quitting drinking for a period, then one night drinking a few, and then the next day back on the wagon indefinitely. But rather the fact that the real concern lies in it not just being one day that we relapse into, but that it begins the whole cycle of addiction over again?

I'm asking all of this because I have had instances like this, not because I'm looking for an excuse to drink occasionally. Not at all. I quit for a few weeks, have a single night of drinking a few, then back to no drinking the next day for weeks or months. Don't get me wrong, I'm looking to quit for good this time. But I'm more wondering if or what is the concern with that one day of slipping. Is it more big picture as I posed, falling back into the daily drinking because of it, or is there actually something one single day can or does do to us physically/mentally that is of concern, and if so what that is?

I appreciate anyone who's taken the time to read, and also appreciate any and all input on the subject. Thanks in advance and hope to receive a number of responses

J

Weaver

"Relapses" just prolong what we should have already done and that's quitting drinking.

It may just be ONE night, or two but the obsession just becomes that much stronger.

silentrun

For me it would mean that I chose to make it OK to drink. If I decide it's OK to drink 2 drinks I could easily convince myself it is OK drink 3 or 7. Maybe I would stick to 2 that night but the seed would be planted that it's OK. If I decided it was OK to get drunk but only once a month there is nothing stopping me from reasoning myself into adding extra nights (29 of them). It is just easier to be done with it and say it is NEVER OK for me to drink. That is the mindset that has gotten me this far and drinking even in moderation would break that.

Raider

Well......yes, I'm in the "falling back into the habit of daily drinking" camp but the relapse will make me feel like I will always fail, and never quit drinking. That is what one single day of drinking will do to me "physically/mentally". So I guess that is my camp also.

TigerLili

Drinking leads me to a very dark place emotionally and mentally because I can't stop once I start. I know it won't be just the occasional night, it will be every day, drinking until I pass out.

Every time I have returned to abstinence after a relapse, it's been like walking through hell. I don't want to do that again and I KNOW with every fibre of my being that I will end right back in that place again. Maybe not after the first drink or the second drink, but eventually, and sooner rather than later.

Quitting drinking for alcoholics is a process, not just putting down the drink. It's a long and painful process. Thinking it's ok to have the occasional drink just prolongs the pain, IMO.

karate

nailed it !

katebear

It is insidious for me. There is always the excuse to drink and one slip tends to lead me back down the garden path.

Gottalife

"Getting to my inquiry, I'm wondering what happens to our bodies, our minds, or both when we "relapse". Now my question is very specific. What I'm asking is, I stop drinking for 2 weeks or a month, I "relapse" and one night I have 4 drinks (this is hypothetical), I then don't drink again for an indeterminate amount of time. May be a month, may be never again. "

If you can do that without any problems, then you would be a normal drinker, or possibly a hard drinker who has been able to moderate. people do it everyday.

Of course I assume that your 4 drink "relapse" means 4 standard drinks and not a 4 day bender, as it would be in my case. But then, I'm an alcoholic.

workingtheday

Yes Gottalife, I meant 4 drinks, not a 4 day bender.

Well I appreciate all of the early responses. It would seem reading through, its nearly unanimous that nearly everyone (who has responded so far) is of the position that it isn't the one day/evening of a few drinks that that in particular is the issue (well it is an issue, but in a larger sense). It is the fact that that is what is the beginning of falling back into a downward spiral, which could last days, weeks, months, etc.

Exactly why I posed the question. I'm wondering as opposed to this issue, is there anything that happens to our bodies or mind in that one day (outside of the alcoholism gaining its "regrip" so to speak on us) that is detrimental. Beyond that possibility of falling into addiction heavily again. Maybe this is a question more for a M.D. I thought there may have been enough people out there who have been through enough, and have evaluated and reevaluated all of this and may of had an answer to this question. Maybe there still is.

Still very interested in peoples responses. Thank you so far to all that have responded

PhaseTwo

If you're an alcoholic then drinking those 4 beers will reawaken a mental obsession over alcohol that's been dormant. It's not about what happens in the first day necessarily but what comes after that.

LadyBlue0527

This is also what keeps me on the straight and narrow. I would never want to go back and do this all over again and from the posts I've read it only gets worse. Nothing I am interested in experiencing for the chance to drink for one night.

Additionally I've also come to the conclusion from relapse posts that it's not really the ingestion of the alcohol that's pleasing rather than the idea of the act of doing it. Most relapse and slip posts have the words "and it really wasn't that great, not worth it".

IOAA2

A problem with relapse is I could say to myself "that wasn't that bad, I got back OK." That sort of thinking sets me up to believe I can continue to have relapses and be OK. I've seen too many loose EVERYTHING inside of a couple weeks and end up living on the streets or dead.
I need to remember this sh.t is a serious deadly disease and even with a lot of years sober I'm closer to my next drink so I don't entertain that thinking or curiosity.
I think about NOT drinking.

BE WELL

instant

Starting is easy, stopping is hard.

i am sure I could drink once, maybe twice- the addiction however would have manifested itself by then in the form of an increase in thinking about alcohol and "reasons" to drink, and BS about how I would stop myself going back to the way it was before.

it all takes too much time and emotional energy- not drinking is far easier

ChiefBromden

Also: perhaps a large part of the psychological damage occurs before you actually pick up that first drink, during the process that leads to deciding that alcohol is an option, a solution to a problem.