dollpart

I did it! I actually did it.

Have written about it. Obviously not with details that compromise anyone's anonymity.

If you want to read it, message me.

Ghostlight1

Great job! Congratulations. Now just stick to it and wait for the miracle to happen.

Opivotal

Good for you dollpart! I'm so proud of you.

SoberLeigh

Congratulations, dollpart.

IOAA2

Congratulations. I got a lot of advice at my first one. The one that saved me was "KEEP COMING!"

BE WELL

dollpart

Thank you!!! xx

LBrain

glad to here it dollpart

dollpart

This evening I took a huge step. I went to my first Alcoholic’s Anonymous meeting. Beforehand, I had a lime and soda in a pub in town, because I had time to kill. I sat there inhaling the atmosphere, longing for a half a lager and lime. Just a half but-

but it never is just half, is it?

I was invited back by some people I just met, for a “proper drink” after the “thing” I had to do (“I could tell you what it is but… I’d have to kill you,” I said. “I’ll be back.”)

At half past six I went to the back of a church, asked if this was the meeting, and stepped inside.

It was a candle-light meeting, all the lights out and just candles sprinkling the table. It made it easier to hear others’ stories and eventually, to tell a little bit of mine. The whole time I was thinking about that pint waiting for me. I heard other peoples’ stories and bit my lip for wanting to cry. I could recognise myself, and also see the differences- because every person is different, aren’t they?

I wasn’t going to say anything. I wanted to say something. I couldn’t say anything. Could I?

Shaking leafishly, I spoke.

“Hi, I’m Becky. i’manalkolik.”

“Hi Becky.”

I wanted to swallow my tongue. I wanted to walk out. I wanted to be sick. I started shaking. I spoke.

“I’ve been sat here thinking I’m not an alcoholic, I want to go for a pint. But… I dunno, it’s weird. Well, a few weeks ago- I have bipolar- I was high, and I got given sleeping pills to help. But instead of taking the pills, I took a bottle of wine and all my meds and I jumped out a window. And that’s how I broke my ankle. And that’s why I’m on crutches. I guess I’m lucky to still be here. So, I’m glad I’m here… and thank you, all, for being here too.”

“Thanks, Becky.”

There’s a book I read as a child: “And That’s How I Got My Bad Knee.” A little girl has hurt her knee and makes up all kinds of stories about it: she fought a crocodile, she was attacked by a bear… and then she gets home, and her mum asks what happened. And she says, “I fell off a swing and I hurt my knee,” and she starts to cry. All the bravado stripped, and she just wants a hug.

The ankle was my bad knee. The alcohol was my swing. I needed a hug. I got the hug in the form of support, kindness, and a lift home with another bipolar sufferer, who knew all too well what the alcohol can do to you.

I’ve done it.

Gottalife

Well done Becky. Keep at it and work for the miracle. It seems more likely to come to those who work for it than those who wait for it.

matt4x4

Well, very few people say there first and last name in a meeting, so I doubt anonmity would be broken. How is a person suppose to go and check on them if they hit the hospital. Hello nurse, is Bob here somewhere in the building?

Did you buy a Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book, the straight facts and procedure on how to achieve sobriety?

Did you also obtain a sponsor to help guide you through the program of action?

DId you get a meeting list?

All these things are crucial, and critical to achieve any kind of meaningful success. If not willing to dive and work a program of action, then thanks for keeping the seat warm for the next guy who really really wants it bad enough to work the 12 step program.

Just remember you get out of it, what you put in. So just going to meetings doesnt cut it very much, it helps for awhile yes. Hope you find something that keeps you coming back. Wish you the best.

IOAA2

I feel that for about 90 meetings listening and identifying is very important. During that period ask questions, show up early, maybe help set up the hall, maybe clean up afterwards, go out for coffee afterwards, and try to get into a schedule of different meetings to perhaps meet other people and see how it can work.

BE WELL

dollpart

Uh maybe I'm not ready.

IOAA2

I felt the same when I came around and was assured my drinking would never get any better than what it was that day. So being undisciplined I proceeded to try to show these professionals wrong. They were not and I finally surrendered to win.

BE WELL

SoberCAH

It seems like the threshhold of the door of the first AA meeting is around 30 feet wide.

It took me too many years to muster up the courage to cross it.

After that, going to a meeting became like going to a second home.

dollpart

Thank you- I do feel encouraged. I'm just finding tonight hard.x

dollpart

]

Thanks. It's taken me a long time to get my head round it, but I think I should go again. I'm just scared.

Persys

You should. It has been my experience that nobody has ever been anything but supportive and encouraging at meetings, especially when I was brand new to the program. AA is one of the very few places in this world where I actually feel like I am truly welcome.

I hope you go again

dollpart

Thanks.

I hope I do... I will. There's a meeting tomorrow but two in a week might just exhaust me... it was exhausting admitting stuff.

deeker

Great job on ur 1st meeting!



There's a saying if you keep going into a barbershop you will eventually get a haircut.


If you keep going into a pub you will pick up eventually. Why go somewhere where you are longing for a drink. What's the point.

MIRecovery

At the beginning I went 6 days a week a few 24 hrs later I still go to 4. Not sure I need that many but I never want to find out. I better get going or I will be late for my Wednesday meeting