I have made my decision
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Sweden
Posts: 15
I have made my decision
Hello there.
I am a twenty-seven year old male and yesterday I made the decision to stop drinking. The decision came to me after a weekend where I got black out drunk friday and Saturday. On friday I was on a date with a girl I really liked and unfortunately the drunken me showed his ugly face after too many beers. Things were going really well when before that. The night ended with us being angry at eachother and I can't even remember why. On my way home I fell asleep on the tram and woke up in the wring part of the city.
On Saturday I got *********, started arguing with random people, hit on a girl when it was not appropriate and threw up multiple times. Could hardly walk straight but walked the whole way home during the night. Had someone wanted to hurt me I would have been an easy target. Yesterday and today I've been feeling like ****, shaking and my heart rate is through the roof.
The two incidents mentioned above are just the tip of the iceberg. I've hurt people, made an ass of myself so many times. Been drinking alone atleast every weekend and sometimes during the week. Most of the times alone. I've gone up during the middle of the night to steal wine from my parents.
I have both loved and hated the person I become when I'm drunk. I've had many fun moments but I realise now that I can't go on like this. It feels good but at the same time frightening. I've never really thought about quitting altoghether before. Thank you for reading. Felt good to get this of my chest. Wish me luck.
I am a twenty-seven year old male and yesterday I made the decision to stop drinking. The decision came to me after a weekend where I got black out drunk friday and Saturday. On friday I was on a date with a girl I really liked and unfortunately the drunken me showed his ugly face after too many beers. Things were going really well when before that. The night ended with us being angry at eachother and I can't even remember why. On my way home I fell asleep on the tram and woke up in the wring part of the city.
On Saturday I got *********, started arguing with random people, hit on a girl when it was not appropriate and threw up multiple times. Could hardly walk straight but walked the whole way home during the night. Had someone wanted to hurt me I would have been an easy target. Yesterday and today I've been feeling like ****, shaking and my heart rate is through the roof.
The two incidents mentioned above are just the tip of the iceberg. I've hurt people, made an ass of myself so many times. Been drinking alone atleast every weekend and sometimes during the week. Most of the times alone. I've gone up during the middle of the night to steal wine from my parents.
I have both loved and hated the person I become when I'm drunk. I've had many fun moments but I realise now that I can't go on like this. It feels good but at the same time frightening. I've never really thought about quitting altoghether before. Thank you for reading. Felt good to get this of my chest. Wish me luck.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Sweden
Posts: 15
Originally Posted by Bluebird1927 
Good luck mate, if you want to quit drinking you're in the right place.
Originally Posted by whiskeyman
i you think you have a problem and are ready to admit it, you are well on your way.
There way be some ups and downs and I gotta tell ya, its a tough road but it is so worth it.
I have never been the same
There way be some ups and downs and I gotta tell ya, its a tough road but it is so worth it.
I have never been the same
Originally Posted by seeks
Welcome! Keep posting it helps me a lot, especially early on.
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,506
Welcome TheRuiner. I commend you for taking a hard look at what alcohol is doing to your life. Unfortunately, I waited for many more years - thinking I could hold on to the fun times and avoid the chaos. I was never able to control the amounts I drank, not once.
I had to make the decision to stop all together - I had proven to myself many times that once it was in my system there was no way to predict the outcome. It became dangerous in the end, in addition to embarrassing and self-destructive. I was hurting and confusing everyone I knew.
When I found SR I wasn't sure I could ever let it go. When I began to post and received support and encouragement, I found the strength to do what I had to in order to save my life. You will too - and you'll never have to suffer the misery many of us have. We're here to help - so glad to meet you.
I had to make the decision to stop all together - I had proven to myself many times that once it was in my system there was no way to predict the outcome. It became dangerous in the end, in addition to embarrassing and self-destructive. I was hurting and confusing everyone I knew.
When I found SR I wasn't sure I could ever let it go. When I began to post and received support and encouragement, I found the strength to do what I had to in order to save my life. You will too - and you'll never have to suffer the misery many of us have. We're here to help - so glad to meet you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Sweden
Posts: 15
Originally Posted by Hevyn
Welcome TheRuiner. I commend you for taking a hard look at what alcohol is doing to your life. Unfortunately, I waited for many more years - thinking I could hold on to the fun times and avoid the chaos. I was never able to control the amounts I drank, not once.
I had to make the decision to stop all together - I had proven to myself many times that once it was in my system there was no way to predict the outcome. It became dangerous in the end, in addition to embarrassing and self-destructive. I was hurting and confusing everyone I knew.
When I found SR I wasn't sure I could ever let it go. When I began to post and received support and encouragement, I found the strength to do what I had to in order to save my life. You will too - and you'll never have to suffer the misery many of us have. We're here to help - so glad to meet you.
I had to make the decision to stop all together - I had proven to myself many times that once it was in my system there was no way to predict the outcome. It became dangerous in the end, in addition to embarrassing and self-destructive. I was hurting and confusing everyone I knew.
When I found SR I wasn't sure I could ever let it go. When I began to post and received support and encouragement, I found the strength to do what I had to in order to save my life. You will too - and you'll never have to suffer the misery many of us have. We're here to help - so glad to meet you.
I think i feel the same way now as you did when you found SR. It feels unreal to think the thought that i will never drink alcohol again. I was suprised about how some of my family/friends have reacted when i told them im not going to drink anymore. They were almost trying to convince me to "just cut down on it a little bit".
Originally Posted by hayley86
Welcome, SR has helped a lot with my recovery. You will find a great deal of support here. Best wishes.
Sick doctor
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: UK, via Ireland
Posts: 52
The longer I drank, the more the bad nights outnumbered the good, and the more I mourned the fun I used to have drinking. It's always a good time to stop...
My family stopped saying 'just have one' when they saw me stop torturing myself, saw my eyes slowly clear up, saw things I hardly noticed myself. There's been no magic wand for my moods or my energy levels, but I wouldn't go back to drinking now.
Good luck, The Ruiner!
My family stopped saying 'just have one' when they saw me stop torturing myself, saw my eyes slowly clear up, saw things I hardly noticed myself. There's been no magic wand for my moods or my energy levels, but I wouldn't go back to drinking now.
Good luck, The Ruiner!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 141
once you decide that is the most important thing. it is very important to see and admit the unwanted side of your drunk personality… please please please keep on. everyday you will feel even more proud of your self. and you are going to see your life becoming more qualified. when you feel down or urge to drink don't hesitate to write here. everyone at SR is so welcoming. you are not alone. go ahead
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 146
I have a way to handle explaining that I am not drinking anymore. This is how I do it when someone invites me to drink...
I say " You know, I just don't want any today."
Amazingly it takes all the pressure off. I just don't want any today. Just say that every day...very manageable and people don't jump to convince you that you have to. They seem to respect it...
Just a small "nope, not today..."
I say " You know, I just don't want any today."
Amazingly it takes all the pressure off. I just don't want any today. Just say that every day...very manageable and people don't jump to convince you that you have to. They seem to respect it...
Just a small "nope, not today..."
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Sweden
Posts: 15
Originally Posted by huntingtontx
Welcome to SR. You have made a great decision.
Originally Posted by Mia1972
once you decide that is the most important thing. it is very important to see and admit the unwanted side of your drunk personality… please please please keep on. everyday you will feel even more proud of your self. and you are going to see your life becoming more qualified. when you feel down or urge to drink don't hesitate to write here. everyone at SR is so welcoming. you are not alone. go ahead
Right now it feels really good.. To feel like im in control of my destiny again. But i dread the weekend.. Thats the first big stepping stone, just to be totally sober for a whole weekend.
Originally Posted by HonestlyTrying
I have a way to handle explaining that I am not drinking anymore. This is how I do it when someone invites me to drink...
I say " You know, I just don't want any today."
Amazingly it takes all the pressure off. I just don't want any today. Just say that every day...very manageable and people don't jump to convince you that you have to. They seem to respect it...
Just a small "nope, not today..."
I say " You know, I just don't want any today."
Amazingly it takes all the pressure off. I just don't want any today. Just say that every day...very manageable and people don't jump to convince you that you have to. They seem to respect it...
Just a small "nope, not today..."
Im gonna tell that to myself everyday. Im not gonna drink today. The first three days since this awful weekend has been good. I tried to apologize the my date this friday and told her i was sorry and that i realised i have issues with alcohol. But she didn't respond. At least i tried to apologize.
Been keeping mysef busy with work and working out. Doing fine for now!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 141
Ruiner this is my 104th sober day. I totally agree about the weekend anxiety. Guess where I am right now? I am in night business and right now I am attending to one of the coolest party of the year enjoying soda, music and people around. This takes some time. So why dont u try to do stg different this weekend that might take you away from the idea of drinking? What is the second biggest thing you enjoy after alcohol? Can u concentrate on that until you form the habit? And hey would u also consider changing your nickname from Ruiner to something more positive since you will not be a ruiner. Even if you do you will be back on track soon )))
)))
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Sweden
Posts: 15
One thing that keeps my spirit going is listening to the album the downward spiral by nine inch nails. I took my username from it. At this point (although i understand im by far not one of the persons that has suffered the most from the alcohol abuse here) i really relate to the story of this record. My interpretation of this story is that it is about a human that struggles with addictions of all sorts: love, drugs and sex among other things. I feel ive always overdone the things i like to the point where it's not healthy anymore.
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