21.85 hours sober...
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,872
Originally Posted by roguedreams 
Hey Soberly! 
I was trolling Cow's thread last night, I really love your posts. Greet to "meet" you! 
I was trolling Cow's thread last night, I really love your posts. Greet to "meet" you! 
☀️⛳️
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Scotland
Posts: 1,506
Originally Posted by roguedreams
So I didn't jump out of bed this morning (errrm, afternoon) proclaiming that I wouldn't drink today. I didn't say, "I'm never having a drink again!" I just... passed by that option for the first drink. And the next option for the first drink. And the next, and the next... and now I'm nigh 22 hours in.
After having ten+ shots and several mixed drinks in an average evening/night (over the course of about twelve hours each day/night, I'd say), I thought I'd be feeling worse than this. I think my only real problem right now is paranoia, lol.
- I'm paranoid that I'll have a seizure in my sleep. Ergo I'm afraid to go to bed.
- I was a little shaky this morning but it cleared after water and a nap.
- Definitely been foggy, nervous, jumpy. Easily startled. Can't really clear my head.
- Feeling guilty for not drinking?
- Wondering if I should call a detox center just in case? Or should I just go to sleep? I don't really have any symptoms except a surreal feeling (as in, I forgot how lovely it feels to be sober? Or maybe I'm still drunk? Huh? type thing) and my stomach feeling a little like - am I hungry? Am I full? What am I right now? My hands are a little shaky but I'd definitely say I'm functional.
I read somewhere on here that it's after the first 24 hours sometimes that symptoms of alcohol withdrawal really kick in. But my 24 hours won't be until 4am, at which point I'll be asleep ... hopefully, lol. Should I be worried? Not asking medical advice, just airing my paranoia and wondering if anybody had any words to share.
After having ten+ shots and several mixed drinks in an average evening/night (over the course of about twelve hours each day/night, I'd say), I thought I'd be feeling worse than this. I think my only real problem right now is paranoia, lol.
- I'm paranoid that I'll have a seizure in my sleep. Ergo I'm afraid to go to bed.
- I was a little shaky this morning but it cleared after water and a nap.
- Definitely been foggy, nervous, jumpy. Easily startled. Can't really clear my head.
- Feeling guilty for not drinking?
- Wondering if I should call a detox center just in case? Or should I just go to sleep? I don't really have any symptoms except a surreal feeling (as in, I forgot how lovely it feels to be sober? Or maybe I'm still drunk? Huh? type thing) and my stomach feeling a little like - am I hungry? Am I full? What am I right now? My hands are a little shaky but I'd definitely say I'm functional.
I read somewhere on here that it's after the first 24 hours sometimes that symptoms of alcohol withdrawal really kick in. But my 24 hours won't be until 4am, at which point I'll be asleep ... hopefully, lol. Should I be worried? Not asking medical advice, just airing my paranoia and wondering if anybody had any words to share.
Be safe
All the best.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Lawrence, KS
Posts: 250
Thank you stoogy!!! Maybe I'm just lucky, but I'm still sober and I feel pretty okay! 
If anything, my brain still feels drunk and NOW I'm losing my balance here and there (never happened when I was drinking) - I'm also just as forgetful if not moreso, but I hear being spicy is to be expected!
If anything, my brain still feels drunk and NOW I'm losing my balance here and there (never happened when I was drinking) - I'm also just as forgetful if not moreso, but I hear being spicy is to be expected!
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Lawrence, KS
Posts: 250
Originally Posted by SoberLeigh
How are things going, rogue?
many were very supportive and had their own "sober" stories to share. ("Oh yeah, I was sober for a couple years once, I understand" type thing. Better that than judgmental, imho) I didn't do as well money-wise as I normally would've but it's going to take some time for me to get the hang of sober work so I'm going easy on myself. Other than that, I'm drinking a ton of water which tastes great for once. My mouth was pretty sawdusty but as of yesterday it's getting better, plus I'm a starving Marvin now too!! Eek!! Lol
Hope you're doing well!!! Xoxoxoxo!
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,872
Originally Posted by roguedreams
So far so good, thank you for checking in on me! I worked a busy Friday night at my club last night without having a single drink! It was the weirdest experience but awesome too. One guy called me lame for not drinking and I said "I know, right?" many were very supportive and had their own "sober" stories to share. ("Oh yeah, I was sober for a couple years once, I understand" type thing. Better that than judgmental, imho) I didn't do as well money-wise as I normally would've but it's going to take some time for me to get the hang of sober work so I'm going easy on myself.
Other than that, I'm drinking a ton of water which tastes great for once. My mouth was pretty sawdusty but as of yesterday it's getting better, plus I'm a starving Marvin now too!! Eek!! Lol
Hope you're doing well!!! Xoxoxoxo!
many were very supportive and had their own "sober" stories to share. ("Oh yeah, I was sober for a couple years once, I understand" type thing. Better that than judgmental, imho) I didn't do as well money-wise as I normally would've but it's going to take some time for me to get the hang of sober work so I'm going easy on myself. Other than that, I'm drinking a ton of water which tastes great for once. My mouth was pretty sawdusty but as of yesterday it's getting better, plus I'm a starving Marvin now too!! Eek!! Lol
Hope you're doing well!!! Xoxoxoxo!
Yay, way to go, rougue!!! So glad to hear that you are doing so well.
It is truly very impressive that you can do so well when so many of those around you are drinking. Really good going.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
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Originally Posted by SoberLeigh
Yay, way to go, rougue!!! So glad to hear that you are doing so well.
It is truly very impressive that you can do so well when so many of those around you are drinking. Really good going.
I felt for him, but it also stimulated a great sense of gratitude for my newfound sobriety.Anyhow, still going strong. One week under my belt now. Whodathunk it?
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 3,359
Good for you Rogue - have you read A Million Little Pieces? Its a great book in my opinion. I relate to much of the experience of the author. I also relate to a few lines about when things get tough, just hold on. Keep holding on with everything you have. When you think you can't hold on anymore, then hold on a little bit more. The urge will pass. As you build time the intervals will get longer and severity less and you will break through the clouds in the early days.
When your cloud turns pink run...make the most progress when things are good. Get into a program if your not and build as much support as you can including SR. IT does not matter what program AA, RR, SMART, Lifeline, Women for Sobriety, augment with therapy. Whatever you can. You might not think you need these now but there will be some tough days and you will be thankful for a good support network when the tough times come.
Good luck. I sensed you were serious about this from your first post. Your honesty by choosing a picture of yourself for your avatar spoke volumes about how serious you are in my opinion (also good idea to take it down). Keep up the good work - honesty, willingness and openness have served me well and I hope they do you too!
You are an inspiration.
When your cloud turns pink run...make the most progress when things are good. Get into a program if your not and build as much support as you can including SR. IT does not matter what program AA, RR, SMART, Lifeline, Women for Sobriety, augment with therapy. Whatever you can. You might not think you need these now but there will be some tough days and you will be thankful for a good support network when the tough times come.
Good luck. I sensed you were serious about this from your first post. Your honesty by choosing a picture of yourself for your avatar spoke volumes about how serious you are in my opinion (also good idea to take it down). Keep up the good work - honesty, willingness and openness have served me well and I hope they do you too!
You are an inspiration.
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Powers Lake, Wisconsin
Posts: 21,717
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Great job! I was reading your first post...the one about 22 hours into sobriety...and I was truely scared for you. As I read it I could relive the times that I had quit. The sickness and confusion and being scared of seizing. Dry heaves and headaches and undeniable and obvious shaking....MAKES ME NEVER EVER WANT TO TAKE ANOTHER DRINK! Anyone even considering a binge after sobering up and reclaiming your life should remember the hell that alcohol put you through. Sooo glad you made it...let's live! Make it a great day
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Originally Posted by roguedreams
Perhaps it's BECAUSE they're drinking that I am doing as well as I am ... I was pretty sick and tired of feeling sick and tired, and with that reminder all around me, it serves as a pretty good awareness meter for me as to why I no longer want to drink. Having a drunk guy throw up near you when you're drunk is one thing ... when you're freshly sober and trying to stay that way, it's a branding iron on your brain. THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I DON'T WANT. I felt for him, but it also stimulated a great sense of gratitude for my newfound sobriety.
Anyhow, still going strong. One week under my belt now. Whodathunk it?
I felt for him, but it also stimulated a great sense of gratitude for my newfound sobriety.Anyhow, still going strong. One week under my belt now. Whodathunk it?
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Lawrence, KS
Posts: 250
Originally Posted by ChloeRose63
Great job! I was reading your first post...the one about 22 hours into sobriety...and I was truely scared for you. As I read it I could relive the times that I had quit. The sickness and confusion and being scared of seizing. Dry heaves and headaches and undeniable and obvious shaking....MAKES ME NEVER EVER WANT TO TAKE ANOTHER DRINK! Anyone even considering a binge after sobering up and reclaiming your life should remember the hell that alcohol put you through. Sooo glad you made it...let's live! Make it a great day
I was really lucky not to be sick in my withdrawals, almost to the point I was disappointed. I WANTED to suffer so I wouldn't feel tempted again, ha!! Who says that, lol.
I'm on a mission to FEEL BETTER. I'm tired of looking one way (relatively good, pretty, healthy, fit) and feeling another (sh!tty, lethargic, hungover, lazy). I'm tired of being the sham. I want my outsides to reflect my insides, if you KWIM?
That being said, today marks day one I'm dropping sugar from my diet. I originally considered quitting everything at once (caffeine, nicotine, alcohol, sugar, laziness) but figured that would be a death wish so I'm taking it day by day and seeing how it goes. Call it the Rogue Guinea Pig Experiment, if you will, lol.
Glad to see you here!!!! These forums are AMAZING, truly. So much support and acceptance, quite the safe haven of hope and recovery!! Thank you for your post!!! Hope your day is a great one
xoxo!
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Originally Posted by jdooner
Good for you Rogue - have you read A Million Little Pieces? Its a great book in my opinion. I relate to much of the experience of the author. I also relate to a few lines about when things get tough, just hold on. Keep holding on with everything you have. When you think you can't hold on anymore, then hold on a little bit more. The urge will pass. As you build time the intervals will get longer and severity less and you will break through the clouds in the early days.
When your cloud turns pink run...make the most progress when things are good. Get into a program if your not and build as much support as you can including SR. IT does not matter what program AA, RR, SMART, Lifeline, Women for Sobriety, augment with therapy. Whatever you can. You might not think you need these now but there will be some tough days and you will be thankful for a good support network when the tough times come.
Good luck. I sensed you were serious about this from your first post. Your honesty by choosing a picture of yourself for your avatar spoke volumes about how serious you are in my opinion (also good idea to take it down). Keep up the good work - honesty, willingness and openness have served me well and I hope they do you too!
You are an inspiration.
When your cloud turns pink run...make the most progress when things are good. Get into a program if your not and build as much support as you can including SR. IT does not matter what program AA, RR, SMART, Lifeline, Women for Sobriety, augment with therapy. Whatever you can. You might not think you need these now but there will be some tough days and you will be thankful for a good support network when the tough times come.
Good luck. I sensed you were serious about this from your first post. Your honesty by choosing a picture of yourself for your avatar spoke volumes about how serious you are in my opinion (also good idea to take it down). Keep up the good work - honesty, willingness and openness have served me well and I hope they do you too!
You are an inspiration.
I've not read A Million Little Pieces but I'm totally going to look it up after this "When your clouds turn pink, run." I'm writing that on my bathroom mirror in lipstick, I swear. Such great advice, something I truly need to keep in mind ... a holding pattern is fine and dandy, but CARPE DIEM when I can!!! I find a lot of this is about facing my fears instead of running away from them. I don't just want to be "not drinking" I want to be "living" too. I read somewhere on here that recovery is not just thoughts, it's action too. Stepping away from something obviously means we're stepping toward something else ... and it's up to us, we are in charge of what we head for!
I've been doing a bit of reading about RR/AVRT, somehow my mentality already reflects a lot of those principles, so we shall see. I'll take six of one thing and half a dozen of another until I find the right recipe that works best for me. But I guarantee I'm not going to do this solo dolo, lol.
And haha, as far as my avatar is concerned ... I took it down once I started mentioning more about my personal life and work, figured I might just be asking for trouble if I kept it up! I put a diamond because it's composed of carbon, which is really quite ugly in other forms ... "ashes we are, and dust to dust, was not written of the soul" can't remember where I read that lol. We're all diamonds in the rough, but diamonds nonetheless
And yes, I find honesty SOOOO refreshing!!!! I think I could become addicted to it
haha!Thanks a milli, dooner!!! Here's to another kicka** day!!!
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Oh, derp! Of course, it's Longfellow, one of my all time faves. Skip this if poetry makes your eyes bleed, lol. I'd forgotten how much I loved this poem in high school ... it's perfect for where I am today.
WHAT THE HEART OF THE YOUNG MAN
SAID TO THE PSALMIST
TELL me not, in mournful numbers,
Life is but an empty dream ! —
For the soul is dead that slumbers,
And things are not what they seem.
Life is real ! Life is earnest!
And the grave is not its goal ;
Dust thou art, to dust returnest,
Was not spoken of the soul.
Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,
Is our destined end or way ;
But to act, that each to-morrow
Find us farther than to-day.
Art is long, and Time is fleeting,
And our hearts, though stout and brave,
Still, like muffled drums, are beating
Funeral marches to the grave.
In the world's broad field of battle,
In the bivouac of Life,
Be not like dumb, driven cattle !
Be a hero in the strife !
Trust no Future, howe'er pleasant !
Let the dead Past bury its dead !
Act,— act in the living Present !
Heart within, and God o'erhead !
Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sands of time ;
Footprints, that perhaps another,
Sailing o'er life's solemn main,
A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,
Seeing, shall take heart again.
Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate ;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.
Skip this if poetry makes your eyes bleed, lol. I'd forgotten how much I loved this poem in high school ... it's perfect for where I am today.WHAT THE HEART OF THE YOUNG MAN
SAID TO THE PSALMIST
TELL me not, in mournful numbers,
Life is but an empty dream ! —
For the soul is dead that slumbers,
And things are not what they seem.
Life is real ! Life is earnest!
And the grave is not its goal ;
Dust thou art, to dust returnest,
Was not spoken of the soul.
Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,
Is our destined end or way ;
But to act, that each to-morrow
Find us farther than to-day.
Art is long, and Time is fleeting,
And our hearts, though stout and brave,
Still, like muffled drums, are beating
Funeral marches to the grave.
In the world's broad field of battle,
In the bivouac of Life,
Be not like dumb, driven cattle !
Be a hero in the strife !
Trust no Future, howe'er pleasant !
Let the dead Past bury its dead !
Act,— act in the living Present !
Heart within, and God o'erhead !
Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sands of time ;
Footprints, that perhaps another,
Sailing o'er life's solemn main,
A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,
Seeing, shall take heart again.
Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate ;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.
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