today
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Join Date: May 2011
Location: city of Angels
Posts: 40
today
this week im going on 3 weeks of sobriety. last night i drove around looking for a place to eat and i ran into an aa meeting location by my house. i stopped to check out the meeting times and dates and they have one there every night. as i was standing there an older man asked me if i was coming in.. and i stood there and hesitantly said no but that i would be back tomorrow. he gave me the look .. you know the look someone gives you as saying "he's not coming back" but then is said.. i will be back, he said. youre always welcome here. tonight i actually did go back and walked in and saw the same person and he said.. i didn't think you were coming back . ive tried other meetings. i mean ive been to different ones and this one was different. not sure if it was that i felt comfortable or just the feeling of being at ease there. im usually the one that sits way in the back and listens to speakers and rarely participate. i sit there drinking coffee and just hope something sticks in my head. this was different. i was the most important person there as they said. i was the new person. they asked me to stand up and say something and introduce myself and then a sudden fear came over me and i told myself to just let go and go with it. i stood up and the words just started flowing out of me. as if i had finally let it go. i talked for about 7 mins and i wasn't scared anymore. all of the lies i had been telling myself as to why nothing was getting through to me disappeared. for the first time in my life i realized that my problem drinking was not only a problem.. it was a disease. one that i have to live with for the rest of my life and my life depended on me staying sober. it all made sense tonight. its that feeling of omg i get it now... what was the difference tonight that i didnt see before? its that feeling of surrendering . that feeling of a big weight off of my shoulders and finally letting go and fighting for my life. i dont know why i stopped there last night.. whether it was someone guiding me there or me just not knowing what was goign to work anymore. but i think tonight saved me from myself. just wanted to share.. but tonight im glad im sober and alive .
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,785
That was awesome!
I know that feeling of the weight being removed, the surrender. The cage door has finally been unlocked.
Sometimes all it takes is some faith and a tiny bit of willingness.
Keep coming back!
I know that feeling of the weight being removed, the surrender. The cage door has finally been unlocked.
Sometimes all it takes is some faith and a tiny bit of willingness.
Keep coming back!
☀️⛳️
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Scotland
Posts: 1,506
Originally Posted by him 
this week im going on 3 weeks of sobriety. last night i drove around looking for a place to eat and i ran into an aa meeting location by my house. i stopped to check out the meeting times and dates and they have one there every night. as i was standing there an older man asked me if i was coming in.. and i stood there and hesitantly said no but that i would be back tomorrow. he gave me the look .. you know the look someone gives you as saying "he's not coming back" but then is said.. i will be back, he said. youre always welcome here. tonight i actually did go back and walked in and saw the same person and he said.. i didn't think you were coming back . ive tried other meetings. i mean ive been to different ones and this one was different. not sure if it was that i felt comfortable or just the feeling of being at ease there. im usually the one that sits way in the back and listens to speakers and rarely participate. i sit there drinking coffee and just hope something sticks in my head. this was different. i was the most important person there as they said. i was the new person. they asked me to stand up and say something and introduce myself and then a sudden fear came over me and i told myself to just let go and go with it. i stood up and the words just started flowing out of me. as if i had finally let it go. i talked for about 7 mins and i wasn't scared anymore. all of the lies i had been telling myself as to why nothing was getting through to me disappeared. for the first time in my life i realized that my problem drinking was not only a problem.. it was a disease. one that i have to live with for the rest of my life and my life depended on me staying sober. it all made sense tonight. its that feeling of omg i get it now... what was the difference tonight that i didnt see before? its that feeling of surrendering . that feeling of a big weight off of my shoulders and finally letting go and fighting for my life. i dont know why i stopped there last night.. whether it was someone guiding me there or me just not knowing what was goign to work anymore. but i think tonight saved me from myself. just wanted to share.. but tonight im glad im sober and alive .
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