Anoronha

So I am thinking I will have a year in a months time life is good for the most part. I call my sponsor everyday per her instructions. I'm thinking of changing it to once a week just calling her and meeting every week too. It's time to cut the cord a little bit. I don't want to relapse though and get back into old behavior. I will talk to her tomorrow about this what do you guys think bad idea?

ScottFromWI

Certainly discuss it with her, you both know better than we do what might work best. It sounds like you already have some doubts, so maybe a compromise is in order.

percasaurus

You are feeling unfulfilled, ditch "her". Find a focus. When you exchange an old focus for a new focus, well, then you're focused on something else

percasaurus

A healthy focus, of course

Anoronha

I disagree about ditching her she is the best thing that has happened to me. She has played a big part in me changing she means so much to me. I would never ditch her. I do agree with you about finding a new focus in my life shifting my attitude.

Anoronha

I prayed about it.

1newcreation

1st off good solution that prayer is there; when was bout 9 mths in, I had dropped down to about twice/wk then once/wk. this is keeping in mind that would c him @ mtgs too. But do what works & don't feel so pressured bout calling everyday. Assuming there's a strong network in place, she's a sponsor, not "nanny"

Gottalife

Remembering that we were beyond human aid, and the purpose of our program, which is to connect us to a power greater than ourselves that will solve our problem, dependence on our sponsor should diminish overtime. They teach us how to work the steps and have a spiritual experience/awakening, and how to have our own relationship with our higher power.

Have you done all your inventories, confessed all your wrongs, made all your amends, and are you actively working with and sponsoring others? If not you may still need to be close to your sponsor.

Just remember though that your sponsor is only human and cannot keep you sober. Sooner or later you must take all those steps, as only a power greater than ourselves can provide permanent recovery.

elihoping

I don't think it's a bad idea. I called my sponsor every day for the first 90 days and then we cut it down after that. It's an ongoing learning process. Initially I used to feel I could only call her when things were bad and she had to keep reminding me that it was ok to call just for a chat. Now I call her just to check in or to run things by her. It sounds like you two have a good relationship and you'll know when you need to talk to her.

tomsteve

this part of the BB comes from the 4th step, but it means quite bit to me:



Perhaps there is a better way - we think so. For we are now on a different basis; the basis of trusting and relying upon God. We trust infinite God rather than our finite selves. We are in the world to play the role He assigns. Just to the extent that we do as we think He would have us, and humbly rely on Him, does He enable us to match calamity with serenity.


to me it means that if I continue to rely on people all the time, im headed for trouble. although I call my sponsor and others in recovery, the program has taught me how to trust and rely upon God.

Anoronha

I talked to sponsor this morning we decided to just talk whenever we needed to I could call anytime.