incredible temptation
 

It's day 4 for me and I'm having a hard time. Instead of being happy and refreshed i have been incredibly, irrationally irritated. I am determined to make it to day 5 because day 4 is usually when i falter.

My step mom and my dad went out for the night and I'm staying with them. They were having some cocktails before they left. (Thank goodness they didnt ask me if i wanted one i might have said yes). They have a full bar in the house which i could have avoided but the hardest part is they left the vodka sitting out on the kitchen table. I went to get a glass of water and the bottle is just sitting there.

I wish this wasn't so difficult for me. i just have to remind myself why im doing this.

Things will get better so long as you stay sober.

Think of that vodka as methylated spirits...

D

Is there any way to get out of the house or invite someone else over (someone who doesn't drink)? Can you call someone? Sitting in the house staring at a bottle of alcohol sounds like a tough night for anyone new in sobriety. Hell, there have been times in my sobriety that it would have been difficult for me!

If not, I hope you can distract yourself. Post on here all night if you need! You can do this! And when it gets tough, just think about the fact that you never have to go through this again if you stay the course.

Good job. You can do this!!!!

It is a good idea to remember WHY you are doing this, true, but it is even better to remember that you CAN do this. Put some emotional distance between you and thoughts of drinking, understand that your thought about taking a drink is just a thought, and doesn't require you to act on it. Understand that there are so many things you can do and so many things you can be if you choose not to drink, and only if you choose not to drink.

Spare yourself the misery of drinking. The last time you drank, you continued four more days and felt rotten. YOu can get to five days...by getting through day four.

I know it's not the warmest consolation, but the irritability is a part of the healing process. The next phase is where things start getting back to normal.

All the best! You can do this!

Time to tell your parents you have a problem with the booze. If they are normal they will understand and hide the booze, or better yet lock it up. If not then its time to move out. But even hiding the booze, your brain will think and try to find it. The brain is a quirky organ, I have learned a lot about it. I am interested in learning about human behaviours and why they happen. But I am sure its a complicated field, and I better just keep working at my job, go to meetings, and work the steps. I am attending a meeting a day these days, thats amazing for the decades I have in. But I go in phases, I am weaning off the roaming around to meetings part, and getting more involved in my home group. The majority of the people there are living in the solution rather then most people in most meetings are always living in the problem. I find my thought pattern and happiness level is way higher when i sorround myself with people who are working the steps and spreading the information thats in the big book on how to stay sober. I have noticed with some of the meetings that I have roamed around to, that when they start moaning and complaining about this that or the other, its not helpful, not one bit. This is different coming from a newcomer or a freshie in for his first meeting. All they know is to moan and complain. But when there are old timers moaning, people with years in, it gets sad quickly. Now my homegroup, most of them are talking about how we stay sober on a daily basis. They are cracking jokes related to recovery. They are smiling. They are bringing the coffee kettle around to fill up the coffee cups. They are happy, joyous and free. I just find it awesome. We are a bunch of people that would not normally mix, but we come together for a common goal.

I'd suggest telling your parents and other friends what you're doing. You don't have to go into detail about why you're quitting (although you will be asked!) but by getting it in the open it may help you get through these situations in the future because there will, unfortunately, be many more to come. For me it's one the biggest challenges of sober life, being around people who are drinking and being expected to drink, but getting it out in the open that you're quitting is the first step to making these situations easier in the long run.

Good luck!

How are you doing Jade?

D

Thanks guys for being supportive. Actually the craving passed pretty quickly. I didn't sit and dwell on it. I realize I was just having a fit. I was like "why me? This sucks" but 90 percent of that was me running on no sleep.

I just got busy doing something else. I even cooked Dinner next to the vodka bottle and didn't think about it again. Here's to getting through day 4. always the hardest one for me!

Thanks y'all :tyou

Great job Jade. Keep it up. :)

Great! Keep us posted! :)