Still trying to quit, recent 4 day relapse bender
 

Despite reading and posting here the last four days, I have been unable to remain sober during the evenings. I am stuck in a hotel out of town for work, so the temptation is much stronger.

I have felt like a giant heaping pile of cow excrement the last four days and today is the worst. I didn't get out of bed until 11:30 a.m. despite knowing I had to come to work to supervise my siding crew.

I am at work now, with a gatorade at my side and a fruit plate to try and replenish what I had lost in nutrients. I probably drank 18 beers.

I don't want to keep doing this, I am young still (27) and I have my whole life ahead of me.

I was sober for 9 days before the last four, and I have gone over a month without alcohol in the past.

Your two cents?

to be honest it sounds like your having no fun and it probably is time to put the plug in the jug

I've probably got no business responding to you since I relapsed on the past as well, I have lasted 30 days a few times and recently I got to 60 for the first time in almost 4 years since I became addicted, I'm 21 and I'm still struggling to stay off booze I keep fantasizing about drinking an entire bottle of rum alone and it's tempting but I'm more worried about my health and dying young so that's what's keeping me sober at least for now I'm at 12 currently my record is 60 I only did it once and I slipped up again after that, it's hard if I were you I would get involved in something that is beneficial to your long- term career goal, like for example, if your current job is your passion then by all means pursue it , but if you have a dream career like I do, which is to be an actor, find out what you need to do to slowly work your way towards it and it will make you feel better, I don't know about you but if I realized my dream I wouldn't want to drink miserably alone, I'd be off the charts happy and excited, so trust me just knowing that your dream job is in the realm of possibility will give you something to stay sober for, I can't become a comedic actor if I'm dead , anyways hope I helped I'm always on the verge of slipping so I'm right threre with you, good luck

Just try again. Start over and don't look back xxxxx

Although almost everybody identifies with their early sobriety by how much they do to not drink again, it usually doesn't help, imo. Cycles of quitting and drinking and quitting again have everything to do with addiction and nothing to do with sobriety. Strange, eh? I know that most would swear up and down I'm wrong, or at least confusing with my statement.

Addiction ambivalence is a state of being when a person both wants and doesn't want alcohol, as an example here since were talking about drinking. All too often people assume they must get and stay sober all the while they are also in their addiction. This is the hardest way to become sober, and rarely works. What works better is to face the ambivalence as a process that as one gets through they eventually break free from their addiction ambivalence and at this point actual sobriety begins its own process.

Its not surprising most drinkers fail at quitting time and time again because they tell themselves just by putting down the drink, they are somehow sober already, and all they have to do is tough it out a few days and its all good. My experience tells me different.

Relapsing has nothing to do with being in recovery, but does have everything to do with being in addiction. Some can argue here about semantics, but still sobriety and relapsing are not found together in the same bed, so to speak. :)

The fact that you can consume 18 beers in one evening and not be hospitialized for alcohol poisoning is an indication of a serious problem.

Its doubtful 18 beers in an evening is enough for a 210lb male to experience alcohol poisoning, all else being equal. I've drank far more than that in a single night without being poisoned and I was comparable in weight.

I am 6'1, 215 pounds so I guess it takes a lot more to give me alcohol poisoning. Regardless, yes it is a serious problem and I don't intend to take it lightly.

Believe me, I feel poisoned, I've had about 60 beers the last 4 days. I am being so honest and it feels good to get it out.

Today is day 1 and I won't look back

No withdrawl symptoms yet?

Hope your different, but when I was still in the hangover phase(mid 20's), I said I was going quit all the time cause I felt like crap, never committed.

Wasn't till I started getting the horrific withdrawls/health problems that I had to rethink everything in life.

Was drinking exactly like the way you are now. Thought I was still physically healthy. I looked it.

I'm 32..everything fell apart FAST(health wise) in 5 months..

Didn't think it would happen to me.

You can stay sober man. If I can do it..so can you.

You gotta get some sort of plan together for the evenings, but rather than waiting until after work, think of things in advance.

If the hotel room has a minibar, get it emptied by the hotel, if your going to be thirsty pick up something non alcoholic/snacks in a store on the way back to the hotel.

Plan to do something in the evenings, a long walk in the fresh air, a long shower/bath, watch a film on TV, or even catch a film out at the cinema. If your with a group of people that ends up in a bar, give them a wide berth in the evening!!

If your evening pattern isn't sidetracked, the same thing is likely to happen, we are creatures of habit, so we need to break the cycle.

Support is key too, are there any local meetings, or just cling to SR, it can't be done on our own!!

Keep trying though, you'll get there!! :)

This is just nonsense, everyone is different.

18 beers a night was about an average Friday intake for me during my worst drinking days. I've gone as high 30 beers in a night. It won't cause alcohol poisoning to a seasoned drinker but it is sign of a high tolerance and alcoholic drinking.

have you tried to look up local AA meetings to go to occupy your time and lower ur urge to rink

My 2 cents?

Real progress came in my drinking when I finally accepted that I wasn't continually relapsing but I was staying off alcohol for as long as I could before drinking again. So it was basically that, with the same mind set, i was sure I would drink again at some point. Man I wasted years on that relapse BS.

It only dawned on me in the end that I would have to change and that was a very, very scary prospect. Equally as scary was the thought that I would have to get help and probably put my trust in another human being to help me!

I found what I needed in AA. Whatever you do I hope you don't end up pi**ing away a decade more like I did!

Your way isn't working. That is, if you even have a way to get sober.

Go back through your numerous posts and look at all the suggestions you've gotten. Then try the ones you've been resistant too. Don't let your ego get in the way of your recovery.

Yes, I have a massive ego, I will work on it, along with some of the suggestions.

It's good you've recognised something needs to change man, hope you find a way soon!

My 2 cents, have you thought about checking in to rehab?

Some people have to quit over and over again before they're successful. Keep trying to quit. If you reflect back on your attempts, you may learn more about yourself and what you need to finally quit.