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"Magic Sauce"

Old 02-11-2014, 12:33 PM
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Talking "Magic Sauce"

Feeling blue? Anxious? Bored? Hate your boss? Hate your ex? Well LOOK NO FURTHER! Magic Sauce will take ALL YOUR WORRIES AWAY INSTANTLY!!! I'm sure you've heard about it! Everyone is doing it! Shy? No worries! You'll be the life of the party in NO TIME! House falling apart around you? After a sip of Magic Sauce WHO CARES? Want to make that extra special occasion even better? Magic Sauce can DO THE TRICK! Magic Sauce comes in a variety of flavors and strengths too! BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE! Don't forget about Secret Sauce! Shhhh it'll be our secret... no one will EVER KNOW how much fun you're having!!! Both Magic Sauce and Secret Sauce are sold at billions of retailers around the world. That's right, BILLIONS! Head on down to your local Magic Sauce retailer and let the worries float away TODAY!

WARNING: No guarantee that no one will know after using Secret Sauce. Side effects may include: nausea, vomiting, upset stomach, diarrhea, general dyspepsia, tremors, headaches, dizziness, seizures, blackouts, amnesia, loss of bowel or bladder control, insomnia, night sweats, irritability, anxiety, depression, mood swings, poor judgement, loss of coordination, esophageal varices, liver cirrhosis, liver failure, heart failure, kidney failure, brain failure, jaundice, bruising, throat cancer, stomach cancer, loss of family, loss of job, loss of income, loss of brain cells, prison time, fetal alcohol syndrome, death and dismemberment.

Magic Sauce: Let your worries FLOAT AWAY!!!
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Old 02-11-2014, 12:38 PM
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I truly appreciate your sarcasm and sense of humor! Thank you zelda
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Old 02-11-2014, 10:36 PM
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Haha I enjoyed that.
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Old 02-12-2014, 02:23 AM
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Don't forget,you might break out in handcuffs.
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Old 02-12-2014, 04:56 AM
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Self recovered Self discovered
 
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Nice advertising copy there, Zelda. Who could say no to that?
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Old 02-12-2014, 05:32 AM
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Love it.
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Old 02-12-2014, 07:43 AM
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The best!
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Old 02-12-2014, 07:46 AM
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Psalm 118:24
 
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Sigh those darn side effects
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Old 02-12-2014, 07:52 AM
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Love it! You should hire Dennis Rodman to be the spokesperson! You will be a millionaire in no time!!!

Dennis Rodman vomits, urinates, defecates in Korean hotel
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Old 02-12-2014, 09:28 AM
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I'm sure I left out a few side effects. I just realized I forgot to add pancreatitis!
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Old 02-12-2014, 09:32 AM
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You may find an compulsion to buy a Karaoke machine and a pallet of depends....
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Old 02-12-2014, 10:40 AM
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Originally Posted by FourSeasons View Post
Love it! You should hire Dennis Rodman to be the spokesperson! You will be a millionaire in no time!!!

Dennis Rodman vomits, urinates, defecates in Korean hotel
Thats normal.
Like going to the drunk tank for the first time, one is scared. The 2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,17 time its normal.
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Old 02-12-2014, 11:30 AM
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You forgot decrease in your dancing abilities, even though you think you're Michael Jackson
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Old 02-12-2014, 12:43 PM
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Also forgotten: "Loose Lips Syndrome"
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Old 02-12-2014, 01:04 PM
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I always used to find Magic Sauce and Secret Sauce were always on a "buy 1 get 1 free" deal at my local store!!
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Old 02-12-2014, 04:40 PM
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Omg - this was awesome. Now this would really be great truth in advertising!
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Old 02-12-2014, 06:21 PM
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You have me laughing.
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Old 05-14-2014, 04:50 AM
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Yep- it is a solvent ! (takes everything away.....)
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Old 05-14-2014, 05:38 AM
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It would never pass FDA approval in todays times .
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