witnessing the relapsed one up close
 

I usually attend at least a couple of AA meetings a week
it is a very humbling experience when
we see one's come back in after a relapse
a Lady that had a few years sober showed up today in a meeting crying
yes - she had went back out and tested the waters yet again
as much as we feel for these ones
who are once more suffering the pain of alcoholism
they help in some kind of a sad way to remind us
that the liquid devil is very patient in waiting
if not on guard we can so quickly deceive ourselves

watching and hearing the newcomers share in AA meetings
is very humbling for the soul
we may even say
by the Grace of God there go I

let us not forget today
what seems to be one of the things forgotten by ones who slip
what a true blessing it is to be sober

one should never throw away a gift such as this

Mountainman

Yes

I should have read this before I shared what I did earlier tonight. Yes it is very humbling.

I came back with my tail between my legs so many times
once we realize that we are truly sick and tired
we become willing

what was our best experience ?
it was our worst experience
why ?
because it was so convincing

Mountainman

the new comers, the desperate and the struggling, remind me how bad it is when I drink.
They keep me sober......

but there for the grace of god go I
:tyou

Mountainmanbob, I needed to read this this morning. I was drowning in a sea of sober self-pity and your post was a slap upside the head.

Have I forgotten how very fortunate I am to have another chance at this? Just last Friday a fellow traveler (a good friend in sobriety) lost her life to this dis-ease. She had stayed sober even as I relapsed, and I often got emails from her about our shared home group in AA; she put together 5 years and I hadn't heard from her recently (I just got 4 months, again).

Apparently she had relapsed very badly, and despite the efforts of friends and family she drank and drugged her way to her too-early death (she was 44).

My self-pity is nothing more than my blaming others for what I have done to myself. I really need to remember that today.

alcoholics may call it "the liquid devil"
 

off and on since 1989 I have had a home group meeting in Lakeside, Ca
it's called the "Jump Start Group"
there have been at the very least 5 people there who went back out
and died with a bottle either near by or in their hand
I was very close to three of the ones who died

in remembrance of our friends who died because of the liquid devil
we pray for them

M-B

she drove in a blackout
 

a married couple that I know in AA recently went back out
they returned to the Program in fairly short time
with some not the best out there drinking stories
she drove in a blackout

that can be a killer
not only for the drunk driver
but - also for all of the innocent people out on the road

M-Bob

witnessing the relapsed one up close
 

Been working with a man in AA who just can not or will not make a firm decision to stop drinking for good.

He is about 50 years old and the other day I noticed a lot of sores on his body. Guess he has been falling down a lot and as we know with many years of heavy drinking the body does not heal properly.

He is a sad sight but, I must say that he is just one more reason why I never wish to return to the dance with the liquid devil.

MM

My friend Zac, was a case in point. Ten years sober he picked up. I went to see him thinking that with all his past AA experience it would be a simple matter to get him back to the meetings, detox etc. I could not have been more wrong.

There was nothing left of his AA experience, it was like his AA hard drive had been wiped. I even hesitate now to call this a relapse because there was no sign there had ever been any recovery in the AA sense, that is having a spiritual awakening which provided the much needed defence against the first drink.

He was a popular guy. An army of his AA friends were gathered round him, but aside from attending a meeting every week, no one knew if he had taken any other action. He did not sponsor, did not have a sponsor, never talked about the steps. He was just a nice guy to see each week at that meeting.

He never recovered. In spite of all his friends, Zac once again proved what is meant by beyond human aid. None of us could save him. He was dead in three months.

He lasted ten years, which to me was evidence that he had made a firm decision to stop for good. But he never did what he needed to do to put that decision into permanent effect.

I try to maintain a healthy fear (not a paralyzing one) of alcohol. I don't want to get all relaxed about it because I have some time after my belt, or get lulled into thinking I'm "cured". When I read about people with years of sobriety relapsing and never coming back from it, it sends shivers down my back. Don't want that to be me.

Delfin

It is not a bad idea to get right alongside these folks and ask them what it was they did or where not doing that caused their failure, then maybe you can avoid the same mistake.

I am always interested in this and have asked a lot of folks over the years. Meetings dont seem to be a common theme. Some stopped meetings, others didn't. The ones that stopped meetings did so mostly because it was adrag, they weren't getting anything out of it.

But if you look a little deeper you might find steps and actively working with others are the common missing ingredients.

As early as page 14, Ebby warns Bill that faith without works is dead, and without works we will not survive the certain trials and low spost ahead. He tells Bill up front that life is not going to be a bed of roses and he best prepare for that through self sacrifice and service to others.

My self and anonther member of our group had similar (tragic) events happen in our lives. We had both been sober a long time. It never occured to me to drink, but my friend got loaded the day the news broke.

A couple of years later, I looked back to try and find the reason, and the only difference between us was that I was sponsoring a couple of guys and active in a home group, just in a modest way as I had a lot on my plate, and my friend was doing neither. BTW, my friend did get back from that relapse and is now pretty active.

Ebby was right on the money.

witnessing the relapsed one up close
 

Well I'm kind of working with this man in his early fifties who says that he wants to stay sober. It doesn't seem like he has been doing that though. His body looks all tore up with sores and scabs. Yes, I remember a few of those on my body back in my drinking days.

Guess that all I can do for this man at this time is to be available and share the message with him that, he need not suffer anymore. And yes, sobriety does await for the one with a true desire to stay sober.

MM