Leshar

Hi. This is the illusion that I have to keep fighting, that returning to drinking will "help" my depression. I do empathize, I too am struggling with depression, this terrible winter isn't helping. I felt ready to throw in the towel yesterday. It's good to post. But please don't give up!

I wonder why your doctor is reluctant to increase your anti depressant? Does he/she know that you are working on sobriety?

It's tough, isn't it, but I'm glad you posted rather than drink.
It's helped me, and I'm still plugging away.
No mental illness will be helped by any kind of substance abuse.
Sending you good wishes and strength.

Turninganewleaf

Thanks everyone. Brian, I've been sober about 2 and 1/2 months.

Amazingglazier

Listen Turning, I have seen the inside of a courtroom many times, if you go there and make a deal they will! They want to be rid of the file. As far as the six pack being Cheaper, not hardly! What is your sanity and health worth? They know you were in detoxes and rehabs. Can't get blood out of a stone! Forget the damn bills and concentrate on you! The hell with bankruptcy, just don't pay them and if they don't get judgements they will fall off your record in 7 years(Statute of Limitations). Hell I had a federal tax lien that fell off after 10 years. Just try to settle for something with the courts to get them out of your hair and worry about you! Stay Strong and Well!

Bostonsportsfan

I know where you're coming from. I remember when my brother asked me if I drank his beers 2 weeks after I got home from my 2nd detox in 4 months. Pissed me off he even would ask me that.

Living in Maine I understand the long, dark, and cold winter days. I don't have depression, but it can put you in a bad mood when it's the same day after day all winter.

Wastinglife

Yep. I live in Toronto and this has been the worst winter in 15 years as far as frigid cold and snow. A bad winter even by Canadian standards where we are used to snow and short days. It has meant spending a lot of time holed up in my apartment alone and endless boredom. Boredom and loneliness is one of my main triggers for drinking so this particular winter is really challenging my sobriety. Can't wait for spring!!

Dan Dare

My Mom had Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD.
I remember in the winters when I was a kid a I would always hear my Mom walk around saying it... "Uh - oh, Mom is SAD today..." or "Mom's having a SAD day..."
I probably have a minor case. My sister says she has it. That and all the other crap going on is a lousy mix.

Ugh!

Turninganewleaf

The thing is when I start drinking I not only feel better but I feel like I'm top of the world. I have been in the hospital a number of times extremely drunk & the staff tell me the next day that I seemed manic like. I require little sleep also when I am drinking especially if I start smoking cocaine. When I'm under the influence I do dangerous things. I've been arrested a few times in these states.

karate

Its been COLD and damp , unseasonably cold for the south .

We finally just decided to move forward with outside work .

I feel great today .

Amazingglazier

I too have been bored and lonely at times . I found one way to get away from it is to help others that may not be physically or financially able to do things that I know how to do. When it snows like it has for the past two days and supposedly 2 more feet of it coming sunday, I fire up my brand new 30" snowblower and do the whole damn block. We have a bunch of older folks and widows here and I love the smiles I get cleaning out that crap so they can get around. Couple weeks ago we got 8-10" and I couldn't sleep so I went out and got rid of all of it, started at midnight and got done at 6:30 am, I'm sure they think i'm nuts , but they looked happy as they could go to work or school or whatever! Made me feel good too! Stay Strong and Well!

least

I don't have a hard time staying sober during the winter, just get more depressed due to lack of strong sunlight. I'm counting the days til spring...