How's everyone feeling about the upcoming holidays...?
 

Now I'm sure there will be a fair few threads on this topic as we approach Christmas Day and New Year's Eve but as I am myself feeling rather apprehensive about being alcohol free this Christmas, I was wondering how everyone else was feeling? Christmas Day for me actually isn't that much of an issue for me. In fact I'm rather looking forward to not being black out drunk by 6pm after having started drinking G & Ts at midday! It's the rest of the holiday season which triggers me what with the constant barrage of newspaper articles on which champagne contains the least calories and pubs and bars flaunting their 'seasonal' drink offers. Of course that coupled with all the 'normies' discussing their anticipation of their upcoming boozy pursuits can make one who is only fairly new in to recovery feel rather isolated...

So how are y'all feeling about it? Hopefully, some of you will be looking forward to having a sober holiday period and good on ya! But I'm sure there may be a few others like myself who are perhaps somewhat more apprehensive..

Looking forward to them. It gets better with time however, just enjoy the food and company you have xx

I'm feeling pretty strong going into the holiday season. My anniversary is Jan 9 so that gives me an incentive to stay clean.

I'm swinging between super confidence and super doubt. I'm going to Disneyland at Christmas for a few days and when I'm tired this imagine of me relaxing with a glass of wine appears in my minds eye. Boy does this image look blissful.

But before all that I'm pretty concerned about Friday night. Man it's going to be hard as the week has progressed my negative alcohol experiences are becoming distant and the positive ones really tempting.

I'm fine with it. This was my 2nd alcohol-free Thanksgiving. Last Thanksgiving I was only about 2 weeks sober and it was pretty rough. This Thanksgiving was a great one. No alcohol and I didn't even think about it. Looking forward to my 2nd alcohol-free Christmas and New Years. This Saturday will be 400 days sober for me and I'm having a blast in my sobriety. It get's better, trust me.

One minute i feel really confident i wont drink and the next i think oh whats one glass gonna hurt. Christmas has always been a big excuse for me to step it up with drinking because it seems everyone drinks on Christmas! I will be checking in quite often this Christmas for support.

I'm feeling good about them. I live in the middle of nowhere. So if I chose (I don't) I could literally go through the holiday as if it was just another day. I have total freedom to call the shots. Pretty lucky.

I also have a high holy day that comes up during this season, so I have that spiritual focus that "breaks up" the festive aspects of Christmas/New Years that might invite over the top behavior.

It's really a blessing to have this kind of opportunity to be totally mindful, to be able to choose which aspects of the holidays are meaningful to me...I HAVE to make an effort to include them. Nothing comes to me on it's own. So it only happens if I select it and make the effort to incorporate that.

I have nothing thrust upon me. So much of my addictive behavior was a response of anger and frustration at what I felt was thrust upon me.

The way I live now in NO way feels like punishment, but it is a bit like "go sit in the corner and think about what you've done!"...I'm in the corner, but instead of being angry and resentful and thinking about revenge...I actually AM thinking about what I've done, what I am doing...

I have always found holidays are an invitation to pause and reflect on an aspect of life. Each holiday has a different theme/focus. I've loved that aspect of them.

I can't wait until it's over. Sorry to be a bummer, but I'm newly single and I dread being asked where my SO and her kids are. I'm leaning towards not going at all because I fear how I'll react to said question. It's my step sisters who has asked this in the past, and it pisses me off.

Hey NoJummy, I'm in a similar spot, think you helped me out in one if my threads before too.

I'm newly single, wife left, still depressed.. Still have feelings of guilt and regret. My family and friends live far away and I have a big empty house.

I know one thing I will NOT do over the holidays and that is drink.

I plan on having a quiet day with myself, trying to be kind to myself.

As far as people asking, I have the same issues. I can talk to my family about it though. But for other people, I tell them we split up and I don't feel like talking about it yet. The wounds are still too fresh and it's important not to rush ourselves in whatever path to recovery we choose. It's not selfish to be alone on the holidays if it will be good for you.

Be kind to yourself

I am only a few weeks of being alcohol free but has been down this road many times before of having to struggle, slip and sliding through the holiday's and dealing with those feelings of being isolated from all of parties and things but what I have found to be good for me is understanding the old slogan of "one day at a time" it works and it really help me through those rough days, however it can be easier said than done. very good topic and have a happy,healthy and safe holiday.

I had a really rough time on Thanksgiving traveling to visit family, being around a lot of alcohol, not having my home to escape to since I was staying with relatives, etc. It was kind of a surprise to me because otherwise, I've felt very solid in my recovery.

I was planning to go visit family for Christmas as well, but after Thanksgiving, I decided it was a little too much for me to cope with at this point. So, my new plan is to just stay home where I know there won't be so much stress and threats to my sobriety. I'm looking forward to a nice, mellow Christmas. I feel really good about changing my plans to make it easier to stay clean and sober.

Thanks FL. I remember our conversation, we seem to be sharing the same nightmare! Joking, I recall we have a lot in common. Actually, other than the lost relationship (which obviously still hurts), I'm in a reasonably good place. Working out like a fiend, recovery doing well, personal growth is very good, etc. How about you?
Thanks for confirming it's not wrong to blow off such a tense event. My family will be upset, but I'm better off to not go. I'm already uptight just thinking about it!

BTW, since we talked, my EXGF has been talking with me everyday! I'm in a good place to just be friends for now, but I remain hopeful.

I am not worried about drinking. However, drinking sure did used to ease my holiday anxiety. I've never liked the big productions. My family always has so much stuff happening. I've lived in a different state 500 miles away for the past 12 years, yet I have dutifully gone back and stayed with my family for every xMas. They seem to just expect that I am always going to be there, and they have plenty of tasks and duties lined up for me every time I arrive. It's crazytown - airports, trains, large crowds, noise...it's just goes by in a stressful blur. And now that I'm sober, I'm finally realizing that I'm going to have to take a break from these functions for a while. I told some of my family on Thanksgiving that I'd prefer to take my own control of the holidays and go at my own pace for a while.

So, this is the first xMas that I am staying at my own home, in my own city. Ever. And I'm 38 years old. I have a lady-friend coming to visit, so it will be a nice change! Really looking forward to a small, intimate and peaceful holiday season....

Of course, I can't escape it. My father is getting married on December 30. So I am now having to fly back to my home town anyway over the holidays, right back in to CrazyTown Productions. I have been assigned all kinds of responsibilities for this as well, including the transportation and photography duties. I know, I know. It's a one time thing. But sheesh. It's like I just can't break this cycle...my family just doesn't seem to get that these things really take a toll on me.

Ho ho ho !!!
Enjoy , don't worry.
Peace

I'm actually excited about Christmas this year. Put up a tree for the first time in ten years. Am going to make a huge dinner on Christmas Eve.

I was never ever drunk around my grandkids. (Reason I hardly saw them too.) Each Christmas Eve I'd white knuckle it through the day until they'd come over at about 4 pm so I'd be sober when I saw them to give out the gifts.

That's also the reason I never enjoyed them coming over and could only think of how long it would be before they all left and I could drink to feel better. It's why the youngest doesn't know me and shies away.

Christmas 2013 is going to be a happy one with granny actually paying attention to the kids and not feeling that having them over is a terrible chore to be gotten through.

Good to hear you are doing well NoJimmy! I'm dealing with life and the aftermath of the relationship and the aftermath of the drinking. We are still seeing each other everyday, but there is no hope of ever getting back together. Some times the talks are light hearted, and sometimes there is a lot of anger from her. But atleast we are trying to be there for each other in some way to have some type of closure.

Recovery is going well as far as AVRT and mindfullness, but am still in the early stages. I'm still dealing with my depression and with the feelings of regret, guilt and loss. But I've definitely come a long way in a short period of time.

Be Kind to Yourself my friend!

Don't care for Christmas much myself, never really have, at least not since I was a kid lol. Gonna celebrate with my family, good food, laughs, all that. But I mean like, for the meaning and stuff, I like to remember that Vikings invented Christmas. :D

This will be my 5th consecutive sober X-mas. The first couple were a little tough as some members of the family really like to tie one on during the holidays. Now, it's no problem as I just sit back, relax, sip on a soda and wake up in the morning rested and fresh while the others are suffering with their hangovers. I actually enjoy the holidays more now as I can remember them later:)

I don't have much Christmas spirit this year and not because of alcohol. Health problems in family and feeling low this winter. I miss the long
days of sunshine. Haven't been having cravings for booze thankfully but have my guard up (especially New Years is bad for that and not so much Christmas). Good luck to everyone here over the holidays, I'll continue hanging out here and reading. I can't wait til Spring :-)

First Christmas sober for me. Apprehensive a bit but I have faith I will get through it. Going to try and remember the magic of the day.

New years eve, again, first one sober. Probably just stay home with my son and watch a movie, early to bed. Probably do allot of reflection on 2013 and think at my dreams/goals for the new year.