Gravel

I had a religious background where I fell. In that falling I found if I drank I could cover up the whole episode. The online facts are well spoken for if anyone is a spy here and not readily hidden.

In this I became and alcoholic.

Everyone has a reason whether or not they want to admit it. It's a bunch of bull to say you was born with some DNA that made you successful to alcohol. Come on I an not that gullible.

People have a choice. And when they die they have to meet their maker. Now if that choice coincides with some man-made event then so be it. There is nothing I can do to decide.

Dee74

People do have a choice.
I hope you decide to stop drinking soon Gravel.

D

Gravel

But tell me why YOU want me to? You sound like you are programmed to me.

LDT

Whether or not it's in my DNA is irrelevant to me, personally. I chose to pick up many glasses of alcohol and drink them over a very long period of time. I became an alcoholic. And then I chose to stop. I hope you will, too, Gravel. I agree with Dee..... You can decide.

Dee74

Nah

I was programmed when I was drinking - brainwashed by a lot of peer group pressure, macho nonsense, and a fear of change.

I'm the real authentic me now.
I'm not enslaved by addiction.

I love my life and I'm doing something with it.

You can too - if you decide to.

D

IOAA2

Hi. In my many years around alcoholics and myself included we've heard much racialization by people with only opinions and little clarity, We found we needed to get honest about our drinking and accept the deal we got. The biggeee is we are alcoholics BECAUSE WE DRANK ALCOHOL for whatever reason. Acceptance is the key to many of our discomforts.

"Everyone has a reason whether or not they want to admit it. It's a bunch of bull to say you was born with some DNA that made you successful to alcohol. Come on I an not that gullible."

So it's a part of science that you can explain from your studies?


BE WELL

Gravel

Science made the nuclear bomb and surely has no good to humans.

There is no disease that humans drink. Drink was never in womens womb. My mother never drank while I was in her. To say that I was born with some alcoholic gene is mean spirited.

Alcohol is nothing more than a yeast that gives off a sting to subdue its subject so it can take over.

Have nice day

sugarbear1

Have you stopped drinking?

Doug39

I don't know if I am missing something but the title of this thread is:

I didn't start alcoholism because I wanted to, I started because it took my mind off

not sure how the OP relates to the title.

Anyway I will stick to the title.

Nobody chooses to be an alcoholic. I grew up with an alcoholic father and I hated it. I was anti alcohol when I was young.

But I have an addictive personality; be it drugs, food, gambling, sex - I am never satisified with doing things in moderation. It's all of nothing with me.

At age 25 I started to drink due to the people I hung out with, discovered the bar scene, and went all out for several years. I then got married to an alcoholic and here I sit 25 years later burned out and broken down - but 90 days sober.

I know one drink at this point would have me chuck the whole sobriety thing and that would do me in for sure.

I never planned to end up like this. Who would?

Gravel

Ah no. I am drinking yeast excrement as we speak.

Croissant

Exactly.

Whether its DNA, upbringing, a disease.....whatever. It's irrelevant when you are begging for some semblance of a life back, trying to scrape back some self respect and dignity.

karate

You can reprogram your mind ,to disallow foolishness worry , substance abuse , and unnecessary negative feelings . I have done this ,Im not going to allow negative worry ,anger ,or regret rule my life . It has been work to get to this point ,But worth it .

Gravel

What if life comes when people talk? What if alcohol helps people open up?

Is it then justified rather than the poor soul sitting in a room sober doing nothing?

Threshold

I was born with all sorts of genetic predispositions. Life is about working with what we got, maximizing on talents and overcoming weaknesses. Genetics aren't a cop out excuse to drink. Whether it's in our genes or not, we still have to overcome it and get on with life, that's the bottom line.

Gravel, if you want to stop and live sober, there is a lot of support here for that, but arguing about why you or anyone else drank isn't going to get that done. I think why you want to quit and what internal and external resources you have to get and stay sober is a more useful discussion.

I had to get over myself, my shame, fears, guilt, and self pity in order to stop and stay stopped. I had to do a real time honest reality check, and then put down the drink and form a lot of new habits, and listen to a lot of new ideas, and try them out in my life.

My dad is a natural artist, yet life took him in the direction of working 60+ yrs on the railroad to support his family. Three of his 6 kids inherited his natural born artistic talent. One of them is a chemistry professor, one of them is a doctor, and one of them is an artist. We are not bound to do what's in our genes, we can go the way they lead us, or choose to go in another direction. Depends on what we apply our minds and energies towards. I never curse my genes that I am an artist...yet had I never picked up the tools of art and applied them I wouldn't BE an artist, same with booze, if someone with a genetic predisposition never picked up booze, over and over and over again...they wouldn't become an alcoholic.

You can stop drinking.

Gravel

My point is, while I lift a beer, there really isn't this much need and insight to stopping. You have a hand and that hand can lift, throw, pinch, grasp, and many other things.

What that hand is tied to is a brain which is a central nervous system. And inside of that is a personality and some may argue a soul. It's within these walls that alcohol is a hiding spot for all here.

The message is how do you quit, I don't know. I have a case of beer in the fridge. Maybe I don't want to which could be deem me as a troll here although I beg to differ. I got a whole case in me already from last night 6% and hiting on the next case now.

WOuld I be typing this much if I was sober? NO. I love people and I love conversation. If I was sober I'd be doing solitary stuff minding my own business being bored as hell.

LadyBlue0527

Hi Gravel, I'd be curious if the posts that you come here and write while drinking make as much sense to you as when you're sober.

I saw a previous post from you that you've become very attached to this board even though you admit that you can't stop right now. I think you called us your fellow drunks.

It's one thing to come and post that you're having a hard time quitting, or even if you feel like you can't right now for that matter. It's another to come to a board debating why someone should continue to drink with people who are doing some hard work.

We care and it's concerning that you continue on and can't see the reasons that you should. If you're looking for us to talk you into it the most important person that needs to do that is there when you look in the mirror.

Sorry to seem so harsh but coming here when you're actively drinking and also trying to be funny (yeast excrement comment) about the fact that you are is just a bit disrespectful. There are a lot of people here who are fighting the good fight. We can't help you if you are unwilling to first help yourself.

karate

Try ,to find your own self ,And I don't give a damn what people say about me -
If they are talking about me ,they are leaving someone else alone .

Ever tired exercise ?

jaynie04

There is an enormous amount of kindness and support that has been given to me on these boards. I feel very grateful to have had others give me feedback when I have asked for it.

Gravel, you have been around SR long enough to understand my concern. You are broadcasting the fact that you have had a case of beer already and another one on tap. All of us are here because we are committed to recovery. Splitting hairs over semantics when someone has been drinking does not feel like recovery to me. And I don't feel that it is healthy for anyone to debate with you when you have been drinking. You always bring an interesting viewpoint to the table, I hope you sober up and stick around.

CupofJoe

Hi Gravel,

Like you, I used to find myself drawn to recovery boards when I was drinking. (I posted on a different site at that time.) I think it was because deep down inside I wanted to be sober. I never felt so awful as I did when I was drinking and looking at people who were sober, who had the "magic trick" to beat this thing. (Those were my thoughts then.) It made me feel really alienated.

There is no magic trick. I was a pretty hopeless drunk, but many of us have found sobriety by making it the main priority in our lives. It can be uncomfortable at first, but we all have the capacity to change.

I wish you the best. I know you have it in you to be sober.

Threshold

The way you quit is to no longer buy and drink booze. It's really that simple.

The part that takes work, whether a person ever drank or not, is living a life that we care to live.

Being bored is a choice too. If you are not institutionalized, you probably have the freedom of choice of a huge variety of things to do, people to interact with etc.

I don't mind if you or anyone else posts while still drinking as long as they follow the rules of the board. I wasn't sober when I got here and I've relapsed a couple times since I joined the boards. We are all works in progress. So if that counteracts boredom go for it.

It's true when we move to any new stage in life we need to learn or relearn new skills. So, maybe you need to relearn interacting with people sober. My sister just had knee surgery and she had to relearn walking.

Living sober hasn't been as hard as I thought it would be. It was pretty uncomfortable for awhile, but it grows on you.

Like drinking feels now, after a little time, sobriety can become sort of automatic.