wanttobehealthy

Wondering if there is ANY reasonable explanation for why someone would have a flask (with alcohol in it) hidden UNDER a childs car seat?

I am obviously extremely upset and alarmed by this. And I am hearing a LOT of stories/excuses/explanations. Namely that he put it there so that it would not be up front in case he was pulled over and that no way was he drinking... That he forgot it was there etc....

And I just wanted to ask others who maybe have experience with hiding/minimizing drinking if to outsiders this sounds even remotely believable?

caboblanco

Um just a shot in the dark....because they were drinking and driving

Change4good

I am sorry you experienced this. As a mom, this would trouble be greatly. And quite frankly, I would be more concerned that there was a flask in the car period, than whether or not the story about placement was true.

suki44883

Oh come on...you KNOW there is no reasonable explanation for this. There is no excuse for him to have a flask at all while around the girls. Period.

MIRecovery

I cannot speak to your specific situation but I know when I was in active alcoholicism I drank with my children in the car. I've been sober for a while this is one thing that still haunts me. I do not know if I will ever be able to forgive myself.

I lied more times than I can count about drinking and driving with my children.

You can get in home breathalyzer if there is ever any doubt your children's lives are at stake

wiscsober

believable to him: yes

to you and I: no, and why would there be any alcohol in the car in the first place?

This could go in to the Quackers forum thread...

it is extremely dangerous....personally I would forbid him driving the children "even sober."


Please don't second guess yourself in such a dire situation...

tomsteve

IMO, the only reasonable explaination would be insanity.
now, onto what you are gonna do about it.

Jsober

When in alcoholism I did some pretty crazy things. They seemed perfectly normal to me at the time. Looking back they were irresposible and stupid. I was in delusion.
I can't really speak on this explanation given as I don't know the offender. But at the least it is very poor judgment. Or the individual is in the delusion and rationalizing of an alcoholic. Either way a serious and hopefully honest talk is in order.

MIRecovery

The genie is out of the bottle you can never go backwards now. I have to agree with others he should not be permitted to ever drive the children There is no nice way to put it this. It is child abuse and if it ever comes to light that you knowingly let your husband drive them the children will be taken

EndGameNYC

When you think back, have there been any other instances that raised your suspicions about your husband's drinking?

Black Bird

They were drinking and and hid the flask. The end

bigsombrero

I'll just say it: the reason the bottle was under the kid's carseat is because he's been drinking in the car and this is the last place he thinks you (or the police) would look. If there's alcohol in the car, it's there because he is drinking it. Sad to say, it might as well be a gun - it's just as dangerous.

I'm assuming there's a drinking history/problem here because you're a veteran on this board. There are others here who will have better advice than I can give in dealing with this situation involving children/driving. Good luck.

Boleo

Active alcoholics will hide booze anywhere and everywhere.

MaxxPower

I'm sorry to hear about this.

Seeing how you've been a member here for some time I'm only assuming that his drinking is becoming much worse(progressive disease). He may have entered the hellish side of drinking...maintenance drinking.

My life spiraled outta control in only a span of 5 months after years of drinking.(nearly killed me)...i think. My alcoholic voice is still telling me it wasn't all that bad. insanity!

Anyways, on a positive note, nobody has gotten hurt...yet.

Whatever the case, something needs to be done ASAP.

Time is critical.

MaxxPower

Btw, wasn't a flask invented for maintenance drinking? convenience for hiding while drinking all day?

Its not like you can carry around a flask at a family get together/barbeque or get together with friends. You'd look like a full blown alcoholic moron.

I never carried around a Flask cause I always thought that it looked so ghetto.

Flasks are for full time drinkers..no?

dizzychainsaw

I hid my bottles in places I didn't think my "normal" boyfriend would look. He smelled the vodka on me anyway! I wasn't fooling anyone, just making myself look even crazier. I hid my bottles in my closet, in the kitchen cabinets, etc...

IOAA2

Unfortunately deeds like this, though a few are a few too many, in my memory bank are still hurtful many years later. There is part of a sentence in AAs #2 step about stopping drinking and be returned to sanity and I had the gall to fight that because I wasn't insane! We don't see the forest in the trees and dislike being called sick. BE WELL

wanttobehealthy

I have told my lawyer, the police, and DCYF. He was not caught with it when HE was driving and every single authority (not my lawyer) said that he can't be charged with anything.

He has a court order that his parenting time is that he drives the girls to school and sees them one weekend day a week and one weeknight.

I will be in contempt if I do not let him drive them to school. It is making me sick.

I don't intend to risk my custody of my kids over this by being in contempt but I am sick over why the GD idiot police won't do anything.

least

Have you confronted him about finding the flask? If not, confront him and see how he reacts. Remind him that if he's caught drinking while driving the kids he could lose all his parental rights, not to mention his kids' lives.

karate

I can only answer for my self ,but a Flask was towords the end of my excessive drinking ,I carried it to hide alcohol .

I hid alcohol everywhere ,all the time .