WTF was I thinking
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Auckland, New Zealand (Aotearoa)
Posts: 339
WTF was I thinking
I dropped a friend of mine off at a work event yesterday and they left a can of spirits in the car because they couldn't take it in with them. It was a mix of stuff that I like, but had never tried. Well, to cut a long story short, I drank the can.
I knew that if I was going to drink the can that I would have awoken the beast within and that it would demand more. So while I was still alcohol free, I grabbed a couple of bottles of wine.
I sat there looking at the can for a long time, knowing it was a dumb move and that it would no doubt lead to the consumption of the 2 bottles of wine. Alcoholics do a lot of planning when it comes to drinking, how f*cked up is that.
Anyway, so like I said, I drank the can. Then I was kind of overcome with guilt, remorse and an overall sense of stupidity at what I'd just done and for the first time ever, my planned session began and ended with 1 drink. I've never been able to have "just one". I didn't touch the wine and plan of giving it away this morning so it's out of the house.
So call it what you want, a close call, tempting fate, utter stupidity...I don't know. I call it another brush with death and messing with fire.
Just needed to share so I'm not fixating on what happened. I have no desire to drink as a result of last night. Back on the sober trail for me.
I knew that if I was going to drink the can that I would have awoken the beast within and that it would demand more. So while I was still alcohol free, I grabbed a couple of bottles of wine.
I sat there looking at the can for a long time, knowing it was a dumb move and that it would no doubt lead to the consumption of the 2 bottles of wine. Alcoholics do a lot of planning when it comes to drinking, how f*cked up is that.
Anyway, so like I said, I drank the can. Then I was kind of overcome with guilt, remorse and an overall sense of stupidity at what I'd just done and for the first time ever, my planned session began and ended with 1 drink. I've never been able to have "just one". I didn't touch the wine and plan of giving it away this morning so it's out of the house.
So call it what you want, a close call, tempting fate, utter stupidity...I don't know. I call it another brush with death and messing with fire.
Just needed to share so I'm not fixating on what happened. I have no desire to drink as a result of last night. Back on the sober trail for me.
Kaleidoscope eyes
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: London
Posts: 5,243
Great. I would probably not have been able to exercise such will power, so I don't bother at all. I would forget about it if I were you and move on. I know what you mean about planning a binge though. If I had been a military chief, I would have won all the wars with the precision I put into planning a bender.
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
Originally Posted by MaidenNZ 
I knew that if I was going to drink the can that I would have awoken the beast within and that it would demand more. So while I was still alcohol free, I grabbed a couple of bottles of wine.
That was over 6 years ago though and I've found a different way of life - as a recovered alcoholic. The same deal's available to you.
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