GracieLou

I used to feel that I got stuff rather quickly but now, not so much. I used to be rather impulsive. I learned a little and ran with it. I don't do that now. I have to learn a lot and then mull it over. Maybe that is sobriety or maybe that is age, maybe a little of both. I am not in a rush anymore for instant results and gratification like I used to be so slowing things down does not bother me.

I also don't mind asking for help like I used to. I always wanted to figure things out on my own. I would waste hours trying to learn something because I thought that was how I learned. If I did it myself, it stuck.

Today I lay down my pride for a second and ask for help. I am willing to learn by being taught rather than struggling through using my own resources.

When I quit drinking years ago I took Zoloft and I agree with you. I did not have the anxiety yet from the drinking but the mindless robot from the Zoloft I had. It was like I could not feel anything. Not happy, not sad. I think indifferent is the closest I can come to an explain how I felt or lack there of.

Towards the end I had anxiety. I was afraid. I was white knuckling as I drove to work, throughout the day and the entire way home until I could get to my bottle. I can't tell you how many times I barely made it to work. I was scared and I cried almost the whole way there. I did not realize how bad it was until I stopped.

I know without a doubt that if I had continued another year or two I would have been a complete shut in. I think the anxiety would have taken over.

I no longer have those anxieties anymore. I am still afraid to drive to strange places but I think that is a fear of getting lost not a fear of life in general.