"Nah, I'm an alcoholic"
Sober Alcoholic
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 3,539
Full Definition of ALCOHOLIC (as per Webster’s online dictionary) I like it. It’s elegantly simple.
1
a : of, relating to, or caused by alcohol
b : containing alcohol
2
: affected with alcoholism
Those of us who are affected by this disorder also know we cannot safely have a single drink because the condition persists post dependence. The condition is related to and caused by alcohol.
1
a : of, relating to, or caused by alcohol
b : containing alcohol
2
: affected with alcoholism
Those of us who are affected by this disorder also know we cannot safely have a single drink because the condition persists post dependence. The condition is related to and caused by alcohol.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,805
"And I know many others out there who could use a good quitting and for me to show that sobriety isn't an end game makes me feel like an ambassador to the clean life."
I really like this quote, Opercent. I like your posts. I can feel your positive, confident energy. I think a big reason why I want to quit drinking is that it may help others, especially my family and friends. I have always been known as "the wise one" in my family and in my circle of friends. I have made a lot of lifestyle changes over the summer and I already I feel people questioning me about things. I think they sense that I am feeling better and more peaceful in my everyday life and some are going, "I want some of that." I feel like quitting drinking completely (although I have cut back drastically) will be my cherry on top! Thanks for your upbeat positivism!!!
I really like this quote, Opercent. I like your posts. I can feel your positive, confident energy. I think a big reason why I want to quit drinking is that it may help others, especially my family and friends. I have always been known as "the wise one" in my family and in my circle of friends. I have made a lot of lifestyle changes over the summer and I already I feel people questioning me about things. I think they sense that I am feeling better and more peaceful in my everyday life and some are going, "I want some of that." I feel like quitting drinking completely (although I have cut back drastically) will be my cherry on top! Thanks for your upbeat positivism!!!
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Definition of alcoholism (as per Webster's Online Dictionary), as referenced above.
1
: continued excessive or compulsive use of alcoholic drinks
2
a : poisoning by alcohol
b : a chronic disorder marked by excessive and usually compulsive drinking of alcohol leading to psychological and physical dependence or addiction.
One can choose to self identify as an alcoholic long after the use of alcohol has stopped and after the dependency has ended. This requires a different understanding of the meaning of the word beyond and outside of accepted usage as defined by Webster, OED, Collins and Merriam.
1
: continued excessive or compulsive use of alcoholic drinks
2
a : poisoning by alcohol
b : a chronic disorder marked by excessive and usually compulsive drinking of alcohol leading to psychological and physical dependence or addiction.
One can choose to self identify as an alcoholic long after the use of alcohol has stopped and after the dependency has ended. This requires a different understanding of the meaning of the word beyond and outside of accepted usage as defined by Webster, OED, Collins and Merriam.
Sober Alcoholic
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 3,539
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Getting to where I want to be
Posts: 502
Originally Posted by 0percentABV 
8 months, awesome! I'm on it too, or is it 9 now? Feb 6 so whatever that adds up to.
Anyways I wear my sobriety like a badge of honor. I own it. It's mine. I did it and I'm freaking proud of it. So if someone asks me if I want a beer, and it's happened quite a few times since Feb 6, I say "nah." And if they press, which has only happened like twice, I tell them I don't drink. And if they ask why, which happened once, I tell them I'm an alcoholic. And when I said this I said it with a tone of pride. Not that I'm proud I am one but that I know I am one and I know that I can't drink and I'm not ashamed if people know. I don't go around proclaiming it or getting in other business if I feel they drink too much. I just don't feel the need to hide it when asked. I don't think it helps my sobriety to keep it under wraps. I am not ashamed that I drank for 20 years and hit a rock bottom and pulled myself out of it and became a better person because of it. HECK NO! I'm proud that I did it and if someone wants to hear me talk about it I'll be more than happy to tell them. To me it feels that being open about it galvanizes my decision to put the bottle away. It opens my windows so others can see inside and show I have nothing to hide. And I know many others out there who could use a good quitting and for me to show that sobriety isn't an end game makes me feel like an ambassador to the clean life.
Oh, and the response I got from when I told this fellow I can't drink due to my alcoholism? He said "right on, man."
(p.s. When I say I'm not ashamed I drank for 20 years I mean I'm not ashamed I was able to shelve my 20 year drinking career. I am definitely not proud I drank for 20 years.)
Anyways I wear my sobriety like a badge of honor. I own it. It's mine. I did it and I'm freaking proud of it. So if someone asks me if I want a beer, and it's happened quite a few times since Feb 6, I say "nah." And if they press, which has only happened like twice, I tell them I don't drink. And if they ask why, which happened once, I tell them I'm an alcoholic. And when I said this I said it with a tone of pride. Not that I'm proud I am one but that I know I am one and I know that I can't drink and I'm not ashamed if people know. I don't go around proclaiming it or getting in other business if I feel they drink too much. I just don't feel the need to hide it when asked. I don't think it helps my sobriety to keep it under wraps. I am not ashamed that I drank for 20 years and hit a rock bottom and pulled myself out of it and became a better person because of it. HECK NO! I'm proud that I did it and if someone wants to hear me talk about it I'll be more than happy to tell them. To me it feels that being open about it galvanizes my decision to put the bottle away. It opens my windows so others can see inside and show I have nothing to hide. And I know many others out there who could use a good quitting and for me to show that sobriety isn't an end game makes me feel like an ambassador to the clean life.
Oh, and the response I got from when I told this fellow I can't drink due to my alcoholism? He said "right on, man."
(p.s. When I say I'm not ashamed I drank for 20 years I mean I'm not ashamed I was able to shelve my 20 year drinking career. I am definitely not proud I drank for 20 years.)
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,373
"Nah, I'm an alcoholic"
With the perennial question about how to reply to drink offers, has anyone ever just said that? If so how'd that go?
With the perennial question about how to reply to drink offers, has anyone ever just said that? If so how'd that go?
'I don't drink' is simple, private, to the point and the truth - it's not dramatic or attention seeking or problematic - it just is
D
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Bethlehem, PA.
Posts: 1,781
There's a business opportunity in all of this, sell "Recovered Alcoholic" T-Shirts, bumper stickers, head bands, bracelets, the skys the limit. It might become a fad, everyone will want to be a Recovered Alcoholic, even if they don't drink. You could even start a "Recovered Alcoholic" clothing line. It's a ground floor opportunity!!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Ventura, California
Posts: 83
Originally Posted by upandup
With the perennial question about how to reply to drink offers, has anyone ever just said that? If so how'd that go?
Just hit eight months. Maybe I've become too accepting of things.
Just hit eight months. Maybe I've become too accepting of things.
I always too remember the quote, "The man who has to give an excuse as to why he can't make it to a dinner party..isn't free".
I wouldn't keep it personal due to shame, but rather than the fact that you shouldn't feel you need to explain yourself to anybody. Unless you want to share it for whatever other reasons.
Having said all that, I just say "No thanks".
Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Poconos PA
Posts: 1,544
I've actually said this to people and it didn't bother them or me one bit. it actually became a nice small conversation and so what. Most of the time though I just say no thanks, if they press I just tell them that I don't and that is the end of it/
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 228
" I have told people that I have an allergy to alcohol. From time to time someone has asked me what happens when I drink. I tell them that it just doesn’t agree with me. If they continue to press me for specifics I tell them I break out in hand cuffs."
Awul1....I blew sparking water out my nose when I read that. lol
Awul1....I blew sparking water out my nose when I read that. lol
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Central America/Florida USA
Posts: 4,064
Good question upandup - I haven't said that...yet.
But, it would be nice to be able to just open up and say it. We alcoholics are MANY, yet we are separated and hiding in the dark. If we all came together and harnessed our powers, we could help mold new laws to help those in recovery. We could hold fund-raisers, start charitable organizations, and elect officials.
Until it becomes acceptable enough to say "I'm an alcoholic" in public, we will be stuck in church basements on Wednesday nights, or staring into the blue light of computer screens until late after dark on the weekends.
I often think of the public attitude towards gays - back in the old days, they had secret clubs for socializing, communications were done in cloaked attire, anonymity ruled their society. The words "out of the closet" are very literal and it's not hard to see how that phrase came about.
I think that the film "The Anonymous People" will be a start in getting our community on the path to social acceptance. I really hope that someday, I can say the following phrase without shame: "Oh - yep, I am an alcoholic. Say, who made this guacamole? It's fantastic"...and the room won't miss a beat.
But, it would be nice to be able to just open up and say it. We alcoholics are MANY, yet we are separated and hiding in the dark. If we all came together and harnessed our powers, we could help mold new laws to help those in recovery. We could hold fund-raisers, start charitable organizations, and elect officials.
Until it becomes acceptable enough to say "I'm an alcoholic" in public, we will be stuck in church basements on Wednesday nights, or staring into the blue light of computer screens until late after dark on the weekends.
I often think of the public attitude towards gays - back in the old days, they had secret clubs for socializing, communications were done in cloaked attire, anonymity ruled their society. The words "out of the closet" are very literal and it's not hard to see how that phrase came about.
I think that the film "The Anonymous People" will be a start in getting our community on the path to social acceptance. I really hope that someday, I can say the following phrase without shame: "Oh - yep, I am an alcoholic. Say, who made this guacamole? It's fantastic"...and the room won't miss a beat.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 226
Originally Posted by BackToSquareOne
There's a business opportunity in all of this, sell "Recovered Alcoholic" T-Shirts, bumper stickers, head bands, bracelets, the skys the limit. It might become a fad, everyone will want to be a Recovered Alcoholic, even if they don't drink. You could even start a "Recovered Alcoholic" clothing line. It's a ground floor opportunity!!
Uh oh
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 226
Ding ding ding, bigsombrero! I want to push the Thanks button 10 times for your post. Someone I knew killed himself earlier this year because of the lethal duo of untreated alcoholism and shame in reaching out for help.
When I first tried to quit, my then boyfriend told his best friend I was in AA. His best friend told his wife. I remember the hawkward first time I was over at that couples' place for a get together: tight smiles, a forced cheer in offering me sodas, the strained conversation. I was ill at ease with finally facing my situation.
Now that the immediacy, panic, physical withdrawals are long past, and I've had time to come to terms with things, I am less sensitive of others' reactions. But it does present a double edged sword: D's mentioned 'cultural baggage' and 0%'s ambassador to the clean life. And congrats to you too 0% on eight months!
When I first tried to quit, my then boyfriend told his best friend I was in AA. His best friend told his wife. I remember the hawkward first time I was over at that couples' place for a get together: tight smiles, a forced cheer in offering me sodas, the strained conversation. I was ill at ease with finally facing my situation.
Now that the immediacy, panic, physical withdrawals are long past, and I've had time to come to terms with things, I am less sensitive of others' reactions. But it does present a double edged sword: D's mentioned 'cultural baggage' and 0%'s ambassador to the clean life. And congrats to you too 0% on eight months!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Central America/Florida USA
Posts: 4,064
Originally Posted by upandup
When I first tried to quit, my then boyfriend told his best friend I was in AA. His best friend told his wife. I remember the hawkward first time I was over at that couples' place for a get together: tight smiles, a forced cheer in offering me sodas, the strained conversation. I was ill at ease with finally facing my situation.
As if that wasn't enough, my friend's wife had worked really hard to make everything perfect, and that included cooking a wonderful dinner. After appetizers, the main course was introduced: a golden brown, succulent, "whiskey braised chicken". When this was announced, the room fell silent. Everyone's head slowly looked down at their plates....but I could see them all looking at me out of the corner of their eyes. I wanted to hide under the table! Aaaarrgh!
These days I chuckle to myself when I think of that moment. I feel sorry for all of us - nobody is taught how to handle these things in a social setting. Hopefully someday there will be progress on that front.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Western ny
Posts: 388
Originally Posted by BackToSquareOne
There's a business opportunity in all of this, sell "Recovered Alcoholic" T-Shirts, bumper stickers, head bands, bracelets, the skys the limit. It might become a fad, everyone will want to be a Recovered Alcoholic, even if they don't drink. You could even start a "Recovered Alcoholic" clothing line. It's a ground floor opportunity!!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: NW
Posts: 96
I always went out for beers with my soccer team after games and for the last two weeks I have said no not tonight. They would say cmon you always went out for drinks whats up, the wife cracking the whip? I finally said that I have been battling alcoholism for years and I just can't drink anymore. Everyone was understanding and I don't think they will ever push a drink on me again. I don't know how many times I left that bar drunk and drove home. I and everyone else on the road were very lucky I didn't kill someone.
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
Originally Posted by upandup
With the perennial question about how to reply to drink offers, has anyone ever just said that? If so how'd that go?
Just hit eight months. Maybe I've become too accepting of things.
Just hit eight months. Maybe I've become too accepting of things.
I almost exclusively use, "I'm a recovered alcoholic. I haven't had a drink in X years."
What someone's reaction is or what their thoughts are about me - that's something I try not to concern myself with. However, since you asked, I've never received anything BUT a wonderful reply and it's never once come back to hurt me in 6+ years.
That said, I'm an AA guy and acceptance if what IS is a biiiiiig part of the first step, and I IS an alcoholic.
Another big part of my program is being honest and entrusting the outcomes of my being honest to a power greater than me (historically, I'd always try to manipulate and control outcomes). So for me, what works is accepting that I'm alcoholic and being honest about it.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Bethlehem, PA.
Posts: 1,781
Originally Posted by upandup
Can you see how that would play out? Someone comes up to you, "Dont you mean recovering?"
Uh oh
Uh oh
That was a brilliant response, I never would have thought of it. Your right, some people prefer recovered and others recovering. Don't know if there really is a right or wrong to either. Again great response!
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