Boleo

Good question. You know Einsteins definition of insanity:

"Doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results."

jvice09

you really think you're helping somebody out posting stuff like this? albeit its 100% true and i can't argue it, but come on buddy.

zjw

jvice09 try starting small break the cycle. if you cant focus on being sober for one day if thats too big a time frame shrink it. next time you want to have a drink skip it. Remind yourself of all the crap problems its going to cause you to have that drink while the craving persists. Go for a walk or whatever do something different get yourself occupied dont try and stare down the bottle you'll probably loose this early in the game.

I cant speak for what will work for you. I tapered off because I was afraid of withdrawels. so for a few days I cut back. and i stuck to it. after a few days of cutting back since i new my days where numbered with my old friend I figured why prolong the hell any longer and i just stopped. But i was scared i'd panic and need a drink and I did not know at what time that might happen so I kept some beer on hand about 18 to be exact just in case. it was my comfort I left them in the fridge for I dunno about a year? afraid to get rid of them was like a 2 year old not wanting to give up his favorite blanket *sigh*. I'm not sure thats the best appraoch for everyone but it worked for me I felt good knowing it was there god forbid I couldnt do it.

The first few days where aweful. I'm not gonna lie the first friggen 6 months for me where full of a lot of suck. But each day it was better. IE day 2 was better then day 1 day 30 while still crappy was still friggen ions better then day 1. oh and yeah I was a real miserable soul on day 180 too but day 180 was still light years better hten day 1 was. Day 1 must have been total hell if day 180 stunk but was still ions better and enough so that i kept going forward with sobriety.

Some folks are lucky 2 weeks in they are way happier. I was probably mr dry drunk or something. I also I guess had a lot of other issues heavy smoker I was way over weight I probably lacked nutrition its no wonder i felt like crap.

I've lost over 130lbs from that time i dont smoke and i run 40-50 miles a week now. My lifes really turned around But each day 1 by 1 i wake up and do what i have to do to improve my situation. yes i can only get so far in 1 day. But a whole lot of 1 days add up.

and yeah I have a really short friggen memory so all the great advice I might have 1 day I'd forget the following it was like starting all over having to remind myself all over again to slap that smile on and its gonna be an ok day and to hang in there etc.. I wanted to tattoo various sayings i'd tell myself on my hand so i could have it smack me in the face first thing in the morning before i fell down the downward spiral of depression despair and wanted a drink.

Its not that I'm stupid or an idiot. I'm just like anyone else. Today "dont worry be happy" might work tommorrow I might wake up and forget that and be a miserable person. Or perhaps "everything will work out" or "theres always tommorrow least you stayed sober today if anything".

I had to devote everything in me to sobriety. People would want me to this or that and I new it would distract my focus and throw me off kilter. So i'd say no and live in my own little bubble. as i got better i'd come out of my own little world once in a while.

It got better tho. 1 day at a time.

jvice09

i've absolutely destroyed my brain. i put on a really good front though (good shape, job etc) i think about alcohol on the hour. worried if i dont have it. worry whens the next time im gonna get it. worry about losing all my friends, my whole lifestyle.

jvice09

im not looking for any smart ass comments, im a young guy going through a life changing event by choice.

zjw

I used to have role call or a head count if you will each day. I had to do inventory make sure there where enough beers on hand for the evening. I'd have to crack one now and then throughout the day sometimes to take the edge off thats when i new something wasnt right. Around where i live its hard to get beer on a sunday so saturday you'd have to double up make sure you had enough to make it till monday. I'd schedule my day around my routine beer/ liquor run.

I couldnt wait till it was time to drink and that first one down I'd litterally suck it back so fast and moan as i drank it. I couldnt get that crap in my system fast enough!

Its dimented how sick i was. I had a friend who was the same way with dope long before i was that way with booze. I recall watching him smoke the first bowl of the day and i was like geeze dood calm down its just some dope. fast forward a few years that first drink was the absoulte bomb for me i was just like him ::shakes head::.

Its better to be free. The non drinker doesnt wonder around thinking about his next fix all day long. Its not an issue for him. Its only an issue for the drinker. I used to wonder how other people made it without booze etc..

I guess the reality is most people these days have there crutch, perscription drugs, anti depresseants, drugs, booze, sleep aids, maybe its just ice cream and cake. or maybe they have an exercisie addiction everyones got something I think to ease there pain. Some of us just have some crappier choices.

jvice09

your a maniac zwj, but i like you, cause your like me.

jvice09

zjw*

karate

Ill play it out -

THE MORNING DRINK IS A TICKET STRAIGHT TO HELL ,AND ITS A DEEP DARK SON -OF A -BITCH ,NOT MANY GET BACK FROM .

DONT DO IT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


DONT DO IT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Don't think im just blowing smoke BEEN THERE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

jvice09

believe me, im a season ticket holder. im trying to find something that works for me. its scary!!

zjw

One thing to try especially if the evening prior was filled with alcohol. Start your morning with a fruit smoothie like a full blender full of your favorite fruits huck in some chocolate powder the unsweetened kind theres plenty of sugar in the fruit. Go for bananas especially if you like them.

All the nutrients and carbs etc.. will get you feeling good. Bananas are full of b6 something us alcoholics do a good job at depleteing. Well we manage to deplete ourselves of a lot of garbage. Between alcohol washing out the good stuff in our systems to well replacing meals with alcohol instead so we get under nourished well its no wonder then trying combat recovery or anything else is such a struggle for us. You dont try to drive your car on a long road trip on a quarter tank of gas. You cant expect your body to beat this stuff when its undernourished and beaten down.

Sometimes if you change 1 thing you manage to change everything. I remember when i quit cigarettes if i just didnt have that first one i'd be ok. But if i woke up and had that first one? forget it it was all over for the rest of the day.

The worst for me was the climbing the walls. I had so much anxiety and anger i'd walk around with clenched fists and gritted teeth ready to explode on anyone and anything. Took a while for that to work its way out but it finally did. I can still get myself into a bad pit of depression and anger etc.. if i'm not careful. I try really hard to catch myself long before I fall these days.

jkb

Hi Jvice09-

Agree with the smoothie idea. Secondly check out the secular forums. I don't do AA but I do practice RR and am studying lots of mindfulness techniques. Works for me.

Most importantly though is to get through detox safely. Hugs-

Jess

jvice09

my problem is my alcoholic brain. it always finds a way. it hurts to be young. i dont have anything to hold me accountable. hurting my wife and kids? nope dont have any. losing my job? nah dont really care. its so stupid that the hardest thing ive ever had to do in my life, was to NOT do something.

Susan2984

I think the thing is no matter who else is or isn't in your life, the only effective way to quit is for yourself. I don't drink very much compared to most, but it was too much for me to be happy with myself. Was a couple glasses of wine EVERY night hurting my kids or my job? No not at all. But that craving for it, that dependence on it, that feeling like I had to have it was hurting myself and I am tired of hurting myself with constant bad habits. It's hard but at some point you have to reach inside and tell yourself the truth.

zjw

yeah its funny how it is. Its actually more difficult to drink then it is to not drink. drinking requires getting it working for hte money to get it going to the store to buy it opening it consuming it etc.. Not drinking is easy you dont have to do squat. Yet oddly its so stinken hard to just not drink!

I'm not sure wife and kids holding you accountable would work. I got both it didnt work. JOb didnt work. Theres folks that loose it all and still they go on drinking.

In the end I had to hold me accountable. When no ones looking who would know if i poured a drink? well I would and I dont want to disappoint myself.

Yeah the smoothie idea works for a lot of reasons. I could elaborate even more on whats in a few choice fruits that are going to make you feel good. get you hydrated and get your cells cranken. Yeah it wont get you drunk tho but dont expect it too.

zjw

Drinking is a pretty selfish habit. Quiting drinking also has to be a very selfish thing. I hate to sound so selfish but I quit drinking for #1 ME. I quit for ME ME ME first Screw everyone else. I drank for ME too and screw everyone else. But In the end I quit for me and only me. At the end of the day maybe My wife and kids will be here maybe theyw ont be maybe my job will be there maybe it wont be maybe my money will be there maybe it wont be. But I'll still have to live with myself no matter what the circumstances are until i'm cold. So yes I quit for myself.

As a result of my selfish act of quiting for ME I've managed to better everyone elses life around me. But in my case I did not do it for them. If i did it for htem and they got removed from the equation what reason would I have to not drink then? I might be back to square 1.

By it being selfish of me to quit I was able to put my sobriety ahead of everything. Oh and believe me various things I did along the way I'm sure people thought i was a real price a real selfish F*** etc.. But they didnt realize I was getting myself healthy I was getting myself sober at any cost!

Now I'm ok i'm moving forward and trying to function like an average joe etc..

jvice09

your right bud. i remember how good my smoothie felt in detox. the whole sober life stresses me out

zjw

alcohol is another form of sugar. as kids we get sugar to feel good. as we get older we get on booze to feel good. Crank in a fruit smoothie get back on that kind of sugar and its loaded in nutrition etc.. Bananas for example have b6 and tryptophan which then gets converted over to serotonin making you feel good. The carbs and sugars will help elevate your mood. and the potassium will help your blood pressure which is probably not what it could be if your drinking etc.. Get yourself back in balance and hyrdrated flush out the bad.

Good nutrition obviously isnt a magic bullet but it gives you a better fighting chance. Quit drinking go eat mcdonalds feel like garbage and try and stay quit? Or quit drinking pile in nothing but fruits and veggies and water etc.. and try and stay quit? Just help up your odds anyway you can you need all the help you can get!

My idea to quit drinking was to combat it from as many angles as possible at once. There are far to many things that can go wrong and toss you off balance and having you picking up again.

We dont fight wars by lobbing one bomb somewhere do we? we hit multiple targets and multiple angles. Its the same thing with quiting drinking go after it dont let it come after you.

jvice09

i envy you susan, you realized you were an alcoholic after you established/achieved being an adult. i dont know how to do that. its hard.

Susan2984

You're in your 20's right? I only just turned 29 if that's any consolation. Sometimes it's not about age or adulthood just finding what can push you into the right frame of mind. Easier said than done to find what that is of course.