Wanting to sabotage.
Enjoying Recovery
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Scotland
Posts: 110
Wanting to sabotage.
Deep down I feel I'm not good enough to not drink and I'm feeling the desire to sabotage my own recovery by drinking, even though the thought of drinking makes me feel sick.
Sometimes I think that I've been drunk or asleep for about 90% of my adult life and being anything else scares me. It doesn't scare me as much as the way I acted at my worst which obviously keeps me going.
I don't feel in danger. I'm happy to be sober still. These feelings are quite strong though. Can anyone relate?
Sometimes I think that I've been drunk or asleep for about 90% of my adult life and being anything else scares me. It doesn't scare me as much as the way I acted at my worst which obviously keeps me going.
I don't feel in danger. I'm happy to be sober still. These feelings are quite strong though. Can anyone relate?
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Like I just said to someone else - I didn't feel good enough either - drinking neatly made that a self fulfilling prophecy.
The thing is you really are better than you're allowing yourself to be - everyone here is.
Fear is strong, but faith is stronger.
If you have faith in nothing else, read around - have faith in the success stories here.
check out this forum:
Stories of Recovery - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
You can do this too BF - absolutely
D
The thing is you really are better than you're allowing yourself to be - everyone here is.
Fear is strong, but faith is stronger.
If you have faith in nothing else, read around - have faith in the success stories here.
check out this forum:
Stories of Recovery - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
You can do this too BF - absolutely
D
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: London, uk
Posts: 92
As I had drank from ages 14 to 40 I never new the me who no longer drank. That was all tangled up in early childhood experiences. Once I stopped drinking I had to find who I was.
I felt I didn't deserve help.
10yrs on that has changed so much.
I don't put to much emphasis on the word 'happy'. That's something that comes and goes.
I felt I didn't deserve help.
10yrs on that has changed so much.
I don't put to much emphasis on the word 'happy'. That's something that comes and goes.
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,242
Originally Posted by BlueFrancis 
Deep down I feel I'm not good enough to not drink and I'm feeling the desire to sabotage my own recovery by drinking, even though the thought of drinking makes me feel sick.
Sometimes I think that I've been drunk or asleep for about 90% of my adult life and being anything else scares me. It doesn't scare me as much as the way I acted at my worst which obviously keeps me going.
I don't feel in danger. I'm happy to be sober still. These feelings are quite strong though. Can anyone relate?
Sometimes I think that I've been drunk or asleep for about 90% of my adult life and being anything else scares me. It doesn't scare me as much as the way I acted at my worst which obviously keeps me going.
I don't feel in danger. I'm happy to be sober still. These feelings are quite strong though. Can anyone relate?
I have these self sabotaging thoughts constantly, I constantly have to reign my mind back in, I suppose its part of why we drank, drink fuelled it, now its breaking the cycle, have you tried ny cbt or mindfulness courses?
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