newman23

Was just curious on how others feel about this. Over the past few years, I've encountered people in various degrees how they communicate their problem with addiction. Some are open enough to announce it on their facebook page. They basically will write a status if they relapse and talk about meetings and groups. Of course that is not all the write about. They just seem to do so if life is getting very rough and they are struggling really bad. Some co-workers I've had too openly admitted their past problems with addiction and how they found and are in recovery. They brought up the topic but I never admitted to anything. One guy I knew in my old outpatient program said he would tell people he can't drink because he's an alcoholic when he's at social events and he is offered one.

I tend to keep all of my problems sealed in tight, and that includes my problems with alcohol. Very few people know. Sometimes I wish maybe more knew, and that may open the door up for more support when I need it. I just feel a stigma that holds me back personally. I feel I could benefit by opening up more, but feel maybe I should only do it with other alcoholics. I don't know....

Do many people know of your struggle? Including those who are not in recovery or don't have an addiction problem? Or do you keep it quiet? Do you feel it is or has worked out for you in that way?

caboblanco

why should I tell anybody?. Its my business. I think most people would hold it against you instead of supporting you. thats just my opinion. Be careful who you tell.

dotboston

I don't go around telling everyone, but am open once I know the person a bit... But if someone is going to hold it against me, they aren't good for my sobriety and I have little need for them. Professionally, things usually need to be a be a bit more discreet. I think a lot of people just don't "get it". Heck, I didn't, until I accepted the problem myself.

Facebook and all that, be careful in general. Once you post it, it's forever. Somewhere, it will be stored. Forever.

MsJax

No I am very private and selective about sharing.

Zebra1275

Yes, in an AA meeting.

Sugah

I really don't care who knows I'm in recovery. I'm selective about sharing my method of recovery -- I don't connect myself with AA on Facebook or any other social media -- but not only was my alcoholism/drug addiction not much of a secret (before 'positive' column inches in the local paper for scholarships/fellowships/publications/community involvement, I made the police log a number of times), I've also found discussing my recovery openly is a consciousness-raising opportunity. I'm a well-educated, successful, contributing member of my community. While I don't introduce myself to earth people as Sugah, the alcoholic, I have witnessed the reaction when they learn of it after having known me professionally. Some folks have a preconceived notion of alcoholics, and it's actually pretty cool watching them try and fail to fit me in that little box.

Now, I'm trucking toward eleven years sober. Did I feel the same way with six months or a year under my belt? No. But over time, my alcoholism ceased to be a liability, at least in my view of things.

Peace & Love,
Sugah

LadyBlue0527

The way I see it everyone is on a "need to know" basis unless I want them to know now.

ashleyr03

This is such a good topic. I'm in the middle of a crisis and active in my addiction I want to stop but every time I try I get deathly ill and have to use again to fill better. I hate what I'm doing its tearing me up inside and want so desperately to stop now. Now about what u were saying I have been so open about my addiction and have had a lot of support I think that's best. But since this last relapse it's on a drug I've never done before I don't know how I ended up here on heroine. I have put my family and friends through soooo much they all finally think after years that I finally am doing great and finally got this. But since this relapse I have kept it a total secret. I'm scared I will loose everything if I ask for help everyone told me they couldn't do anything for me if I relapsed again. I would even be kicked out of my home. So how do I get help I'm stuck in this deathly secret and all I want to do is stop now but doing it on my own is soo hard then I have to fake being sick when I feel like I'm dying. But if I told anyone things would be awful but I want to be done! So that's where I'm at with keeping my disease a secret or telling and if anyone can help me please reply anything!

GroundhogDay

I would never post it on Facebook or discuss it in a professional setting, but I am generally open with people that I judge able to have an open and honest conversation about real issues.

alphaomega

I never told a soul in the past. I wanted that escape hatch that I could fall into when I returned to the bottle.

But this time is different.

I want sobriety more than anything I have ever wanted in my life. And I feel like since its the way, the only way, I'm not going to perish from this disease, I wear the "I'm In Recovery" banner loud and proud now. Because I WANT to be held accountable. I WANT my friends and family to tackle me to the ground if I decide I can have just one, I WANT to watch my daughter grow up. I want to LIVE now. I don't just want to exist. And I'm no longer ashamed of who and what I am. The more sober I become, the more authentic I want to be. And right now, for me, hiding in plain sight feels too similar to my drinking days. I hid behind the alcohol. For decades.

Now that being said, I don't think FB is the place to say hi I'm Alpha and I'm an alcoholic. For me. But if I have a interaction with a fellow AA that goes towards that persuasion, I'm ok with it.

Truth be told, people don't really care. Other than your immediates. Honestly, they either don't want to be bothered with others problems or they don't want you to make them feel like they, too, might have a problem.

Be well.

FeenixxRising

I'm not ashamed, but I see no reason to wear it on my sleeve. I don't care to have sobriety be the focal point of my life and personality. I'm just like any other guy, except I don't drink.

Renarde

No one. I wish I could but I'm not there yet.

sunset01

A select few, never on facebook, not that I actually use it much. But here I feel comfortable sharing, probably because none of you actually know me.

Bender

You don't need to tell people your an "alcoholic" or are in AA....I think it makes people unconfortable in social situations especially if there is alcohol involved. I just say I don't feel like drinking or I'm on a diet. When I am at a social event like a wedding I will usually drink a coke with ice in a short glass and most people assume its got booze in it. Heck throw a lime wedge in there.....its a virgin cuba libre. The less people know about my problems the better imho.....let em worry about their own.

TopFlight

I've only gone in depth about the real reasons I quit with my family and two close friends. Other than that, I usually just say I'm on a health shtick right now.

Kathleen41

I only shared with very close friends and very close family. Maybe someday I'll go public, but not today!!

I am a working medical professional, and I am concerned about the ramifications of openly admitting a substance abuse issue, even though I'm in recovery. I've never (yet) had legal or professional consequences due to my drinking, and didn't go to inpatient treatment. So I've been able to keep it relatively quiet. There is still quite a stigma associated with substance abuse and mental illness.

Just be sure to think it through, and have the right reasons for sharing if you decide to do it.

GracieLou

Only two family members and one friend know outside AA. I have become friends with several ladies in AA and they are now my friends on Facebook too. I wanted to be able to share and encourage each other so I created a group. I made it secret so only we can see each others posts. They are all excited about it and we post our struggles and encouragement there rather than having it on the main feed for all to see.

It is a safe place for us to stay in contact and discuss AA without the world knowing.

Lindsaysg13

I'm open about it to close family members and friends, but that's it. Of course my psychiatrist and therapist as well. That's about it.

fantail

I'm becoming more open as sobriety becomes more a part of me and less something fragile that I'm not sure I can keep.

I had a relapse a month ago and at that point I told my immediate family. Used the word and everything. I was terrified but I can't even express how good it feels not to be hiding that from them anymore. Now when I talk to them I can be like "I'm feeling really good about sobriety this week!" or "ugh I went to a party and my friend got really drunk and it sucked." It's a level of honesty and just open conversation that I haven't had with them (or anyone) in years and years.

As far as I'm concerned they're the only ones who really need to know... they're my safety net and also I know they worry about me, so I feel like it's fair.

But recently someone I know was talking about a family member of theirs who has a drinking problem, and I knew that the stuff I know could help... and I found myself talking about it. Not in a "I have a problem" way... in a "I quit drinking and learned a ton about dependency so here's what you need to know about what's going on with your brother."

It felt good to help, and to not lie by pretending I didn't know anything about it.

So I guess the trend for me is towards openness, but very slowly and only where it makes sense. Bit by bit it's becoming an integrated part of my personality, I guess, instead of The One Important Thing. It feels good.

Threshold

I've told very few people. Only the people closest to me that they actually want to know and want to be there for me. Never at work. Never on FB.

Most people in my life don't need to know, care to know, or would know how to respond. I have found that announcing something like that to someone, they feel like they need to say something, then things just get weird.

With some friends, it came up eventually during the normal course of life and conversations, and then it wasn't weird.