Advice needed for a AA who was asked to sponsor a NA
Ryno032709
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Concord
Posts: 103
Advice needed for a AA who was asked to sponsor a NA
Hello my name is Ryno and I am an Alcoholic...
Recently, i helped a friend from high school who was an Addict (but doesnt drink) to go to his first meeting. Since then, He has remained sober on his own with the help and support of others he meets whilst attending NA and AA meetings.
Tonight, he asked me to be his Sponsor. I ofcouse accepted. But, i tried to explain to him that I can only be temporary and at some point hes going to need to get a sponsor in NA.
My reason for posting this thread is beacuse I would like some suggestions from you all on how to go about this. Although, from what I understand the AA and NA process of recovery/ sobriety is the same... With me being an alcoholic, and him a user of drugs, I am not confident On what to do. Any thoughts and suggestions you folks may have would be greatly appreciated!
Recently, i helped a friend from high school who was an Addict (but doesnt drink) to go to his first meeting. Since then, He has remained sober on his own with the help and support of others he meets whilst attending NA and AA meetings.
Tonight, he asked me to be his Sponsor. I ofcouse accepted. But, i tried to explain to him that I can only be temporary and at some point hes going to need to get a sponsor in NA.
My reason for posting this thread is beacuse I would like some suggestions from you all on how to go about this. Although, from what I understand the AA and NA process of recovery/ sobriety is the same... With me being an alcoholic, and him a user of drugs, I am not confident On what to do. Any thoughts and suggestions you folks may have would be greatly appreciated!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Melbourne Australia.
Posts: 3,748
It depends what sort of drug(s) he is on.
As a recovering alcoholic/addict I attend AA and occasionally NA.
For many years I was on benzos, but know very little about heroin, cocaine etc.
The AA, NA teachings, in part, rely on understanding of the other persons disease.
I am sure you will be able to provide some understanding and help, till a suitable NA
sponsor comes up.
As a recovering alcoholic/addict I attend AA and occasionally NA.
For many years I was on benzos, but know very little about heroin, cocaine etc.
The AA, NA teachings, in part, rely on understanding of the other persons disease.
I am sure you will be able to provide some understanding and help, till a suitable NA
sponsor comes up.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: De
Posts: 1,333
I started in NA back before there was a Basic Text. We used The Big Book and The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. Many of us attended both AA and NA. I had AA sponsor and a NA sponsor. Besides switching the work drugs for alcohol, there wasn't much of a difference.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 2,126
Hey Db1105----
I see your DOS is 1977; didn't you guys have 'the little white book' back then; I seem to remember it first came out in 1976.................eh?
(o:
NoelleR
P.S. I don't know who gave me mine, but I still gottit.........
(o:
I see your DOS is 1977; didn't you guys have 'the little white book' back then; I seem to remember it first came out in 1976.................eh?
(o:
NoelleR
P.S. I don't know who gave me mine, but I still gottit.........
(o:
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: De
Posts: 1,333
Originally Posted by NoelleR 
Hey Db1105----
I see your DOS is 1977; didn't you guys have 'the little white book' back then; I seem to remember it first came out in 1976.................eh?
(o:
NoelleR
P.S. I don't know who gave me mine, but I still gottit.........
(o:
I see your DOS is 1977; didn't you guys have 'the little white book' back then; I seem to remember it first came out in 1976.................eh?
(o:
NoelleR
P.S. I don't know who gave me mine, but I still gottit.........
(o:
All I really remember of NA was that we only had 2 meetings a week back then. We were part of the Philly area and since we were closest to one prison, we had a permanent commitment to have a wet NA meeting there. My sponsor took me there every other Friday. That was a big help. I also remember when I had the literature commitment, I had to call Jimmy K. I remember the pamphlets and the key tags, but I still don't recall the Little White Book.
I stopped NA in '80 when I started college since there were no close by meetings. I stuck with AA. I tried going back after finishing school but it just wasn't the same,so I've just stayed with AA since then.
Like most things in my life these days, I'll probably recall it in a day or two.
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 6,613
I would suggest you are best equipped to help other alcoholics. If you are anything like me the drug scene is completely beyond my experience. AA's greatest strength is its singleness of purpose.
But on the other hand there is nothing wrong with helping a friend. Also it is no bad thing to share this program with anyone who wants it and I often find myself happy to spend time with an addict discussing the steps etc. Where I would be totally useless is in a NA 12step situation. And of course I cannot suggest that a non alcoholic can be a member of AA.
Ultimately, NA needs recovered addicts in the same way that AA needs its recovered alcoholics.
But on the other hand there is nothing wrong with helping a friend. Also it is no bad thing to share this program with anyone who wants it and I often find myself happy to spend time with an addict discussing the steps etc. Where I would be totally useless is in a NA 12step situation. And of course I cannot suggest that a non alcoholic can be a member of AA.
Ultimately, NA needs recovered addicts in the same way that AA needs its recovered alcoholics.
paradox
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 665
One issue that may be more important than the AA/NA issue is your prior friendship with this person.
My brother asked a friend to be his sponsor based on friendship alone. He had not been in any meetings with his sponsor. Our friend's style of sponsorship was quite strict. This did not suit my brother. He wound up drinking for another year. There are other factors that contributed to my brother's relapse, no doubt. He is sober now, thank God.
Please consider the possibility that your friend may have asked you, as the easier option; rather than asking a fellow adict from a meeting of NA.
It may be best that you offer your help with your friend's recovery, whilst encouraging them to get a sponsor from NA to guide them through the steps.
My brother asked a friend to be his sponsor based on friendship alone. He had not been in any meetings with his sponsor. Our friend's style of sponsorship was quite strict. This did not suit my brother. He wound up drinking for another year. There are other factors that contributed to my brother's relapse, no doubt. He is sober now, thank God.
Please consider the possibility that your friend may have asked you, as the easier option; rather than asking a fellow adict from a meeting of NA.
It may be best that you offer your help with your friend's recovery, whilst encouraging them to get a sponsor from NA to guide them through the steps.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,947
Only the first step... Just one word in the first step, which is a two parter, mentions alcohol... All the rest point the way to spiritual awakening... I see absolutely no reason why you couldn't sponsor him. It's an inside job.
If he needs help on the other journey in recovery, the outside job, persons places and things... Well only the two of you can decide, but that's not sponsorship, that's friendship, mentoring, counseling all that other very important stuff.
If he needs help on the other journey in recovery, the outside job, persons places and things... Well only the two of you can decide, but that's not sponsorship, that's friendship, mentoring, counseling all that other very important stuff.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 625
There is always the question: What did your sponsor have to say about this? or, sending things up the chain of command, What did your Higher Power say about it?
As it is considered bad form to answer a question with a question, here's my take on it:
It depends. Dr. Silkworth had a few things to say that I think are germane to the discussion:
and
Like you, your NA friend is primarily a human being - afflicted with human nature. How human beings afflicted with human nature react when the primal part of their brain demands a fix is pretty much the same. The twelve step solution for both is a higher power and while human beings afflicted with human nature might debate the differences between the two diseases, I can't imagine a higher power debating their need for him/her/it.
As for you leading him to the answer to his dilemma... personally I think that many addicts are better fits with some alcoholics than they are with some addicts and vice versa. A low bottom skid row alcoholic can, in my opinion, more readily identify with an addict than he might be able to with the high bottom 16 year old kid right out of a treatment center. Good luck moving forward.
As it is considered bad form to answer a question with a question, here's my take on it:
It depends. Dr. Silkworth had a few things to say that I think are germane to the discussion:
Originally Posted by DrSilkworth
Of course, the alcoholic himself tends to think of himself as different, somebody special, with unique tendencies and reactions. Many psychiatrists, doctors, and therapists carry the same idea to extremes in their analyses and treatment of alcoholics.
Sometimes they make a complicated mystery of a condition which is found in all human beings, whether they drink whiskey or buttermilk.
To be sure, alcoholism, like every other disease, does manifest itself in some unique ways. It does have a number of baffling peculiarities which differ from those of all other diseases.
At the same time, any of the symptoms and much of the behavior of alcoholism are closely paralleled and even duplicated in other diseases.
Sometimes they make a complicated mystery of a condition which is found in all human beings, whether they drink whiskey or buttermilk.
To be sure, alcoholism, like every other disease, does manifest itself in some unique ways. It does have a number of baffling peculiarities which differ from those of all other diseases.
At the same time, any of the symptoms and much of the behavior of alcoholism are closely paralleled and even duplicated in other diseases.
Originally Posted by DrSilkworth
I think we'll help the alcoholic more if we can first recognize that he is primarily a human being - afflicted with human nature.
As for you leading him to the answer to his dilemma... personally I think that many addicts are better fits with some alcoholics than they are with some addicts and vice versa. A low bottom skid row alcoholic can, in my opinion, more readily identify with an addict than he might be able to with the high bottom 16 year old kid right out of a treatment center. Good luck moving forward.
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