Dusting myself off after isolation & eating spiral
 

I have lost about 30lbs in the past year since I got sober, but over the past week I have been eating junk food like crazy. Going nuts on ice cream again, just like I was my first month sober. Eating red meat, pork, all kinds of junk. I am still eating salads and staying away from any bread or soda. But I worry that my habits are getting away from me. I felt almost sick yesterday from ice cream! I guess I am not complaining about a tummy ache, but rather that I felt a bit out of control with it. Oddly enough I was having cravings for marijuana during this time as well. On top of that, there was a pile of dirty clothes in the corner and I didn't even bother to throw them in the laundry basket. And I was smoking cigs like they were going out of style.

Talk about warning signs. Doesn't take a genius to see what's happening and I'm glad I could identify it, things can go downhill quick if you take your eyes off the road.

Yesterday I finally snapped out of it, suddenly wide awake to what is going on. This morning I took a shower at a normal hour, dressed proper and went out to meet a friend at a cafe. I had no idea how much I needed that. Just conversation with someone over coffee was nice. Called my parents for a chat, got real work done, and shook off the cobwebs.

Man, you take your eyes off the road and things can spiral real quick. Even with one year sober in the rear view mirror. I think socialization is more important to me than I care to admit. Apathy seems to follow isolation and vice-versa.

I will get out each day and socialize. I have found success with this in the past when first getting clean, meeting new and has always been positive. It worked today, it will work tomorrow. Okay I'm motivated. Wish me luck.

you don't need luck Big S, but I wish it all the same :)

D

You had the sense to recognize the warning signs and you took action. I'd say that you handled things very well. :You_Rock_

Love your insight on the connection between isolation and apathy.
You are so right Sir!! Keep up the great work!

Muy bien, Sombrero! :) Adelante!

sounds like you where working towards order in your life and found it getting out of line again. Like you I sobered up lost weight and started fixing things in my life. Lost more weight quit smoking got in shape got out of debt blah blah still gotta clean out the basement and so on.

Its cool that you recognize the need to make forward progress rather then allowing the world to cave back in on you. I too find that if i just stay headed in the right direction things tend to stay somewhat ok. But i get scared myself even to detour from the course.

Yeah, maybe I am hyper-sensitive and still am wary. It sounds kind of silly now, I didn't eat much salad for a week and now I'm freaking...ha. But seriously, the dirty clothes, the odd sleeping hours, the diet - it was out of character for me and it spooked me. I am very keen and aware when I start to get out-of-whack.

For me, I fear that even the slightest inch downhill could result in a very fast and violent fall. My alcoholism became out of control and very scary in a short period of time, so little signs like this freak me out. Perhaps I am a bit on the paranoid side, but I am that way for a reason.

Great job reining things in! :)