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Old 07-20-2013, 02:11 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Sobriety milestones and feelings


Hello all

This is day 30 of my sobriety and I feel good - but not great.

Are things going to get better?

Did you feel any different after 3 months, 6 months or a year of sobriety?

Have I got better times to look forward to or will I basically be maintaining my current position.

I know it's different for everyone but just wanted to hear other people's experiences.
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Old 07-20-2013, 02:36 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Congrats on 30 days Billy

It took me a while to feel good - but then again I'd been drinking for years.
I'd budget for 3 months or so - whats 12 weeks against the rest of your life?

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Old 07-20-2013, 03:12 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Give it more time. I am over two years into recovery and my life is now vastly better. Things improve over time if you are patient and work it.
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Old 07-20-2013, 06:42 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Congrats on 30 days! In month two I started to get my sense of humor back in more appreciable ways. Month three I started to settle down some - my thoughts and emotions didn't have such a hard edge to them. In my fourth month it was if a light was turned on. In my fifth month now and I'm seeing life more clearly than I ever have before, and I have the ability to take good actions and make quality decisions.

That said, everyone's path is different. I sometimes feel like I'm a slow learner but I've been working at my sobriety like it's my job. YMMV. But I can tell you that you couldn't pay me to give up my sobriety now, it is that much of a better mental state for me. Life still has its ups and downs, but I can handle both far better without alcohol.
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Old 07-20-2013, 06:55 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Thanks guys.

Reading your comments has made me determined to redouble my efforts.
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Old 07-20-2013, 10:08 AM   #6 (permalink)
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I definitely noticed a difference between the one month and two month point. Hang in there
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Old 07-20-2013, 10:33 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Be patient.

There is a lot of improvement over time. I thought I felt good at 30 days, and I did, but was surprised at how good I felt at 90 days, and again at 180. At a year sober I felt wonderful and at two years felt twice as good. So I can't wait for three years.
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Old 07-20-2013, 10:35 AM   #8 (permalink)
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It will keep getting better.

Have you read about PAWS?

This article helped me a lot in understanding what we go through after we quit drinking. (And it also has some great suggestions for things to be aware of and things you can do that will help you to feel better during the first few months). Why We Don’t Get Better Immediately: Post-acute Withdrawal Syndrome (PAWS) | What...Me Sober?
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Old 07-20-2013, 11:01 AM   #9 (permalink)
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That's brilliant. Will read in detail later tonight.

Thanks DG.
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Old 07-20-2013, 02:11 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dbillyd View Post

Are things going to get better?

Did you feel any different after 3 months, 6 months or a year of sobriety?

Have I got better times to look forward to or will I basically be maintaining my current position.
For me I always felt better each day for about 30 days then it leveled out for me. The obsession to drink never got any better above 30 days.

It took a Spiritual Awakening to get the obsession out of my mind. That was the result of action rather than time.
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Old 07-20-2013, 02:43 PM   #11 (permalink)
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I agree with Boleo. I felt better as I worked through the twelve steps of AA with a
sponsor. When I procrastinated, I started to feel worse. People told me why I was
feeling worse. Eventually, I believed them and got on with working on my recovery.
Now, at 8 years sobriety, the happy days outnumber the sad. I am grateful for life.
For me, length of sobriety is less important than fostering a fit spiritual condition.
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Old 07-20-2013, 02:56 PM   #12 (permalink)
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30 days, 60 days, 3 months, 6 months, 9 months, 1 yr, 2yrs were all significant, yet different milestones in my recovery. What these milestones will mean to you is something else. You while notice as you reach each milestone that you will feel differently as you build a firmer foundation in your recovery. You will also notice that you people will treat you differently and expect more from you as you progress along your journey. So yes you have better times ahead of yourself, just hang in there and enjoy the ride. Stop from time to time and enjoy where you are in your recovery and reflect often. By doing this you will get the most out of your recovery and recognize when you are feeling significantly different.
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Old 07-20-2013, 03:38 PM   #13 (permalink)
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I'm coming up on 7 months, Billy, after abusing alcohol for 30 years. It was getting worse, too. My changes between now and 30 days:
* Confidence the I can achieve the goal of never drinking again. (This is huge!)
* Sleep is way better
* Big, positive changes in physical appearance
* Drinking buddies stopped harassing me to join them
* Understanding the very real and detrimental physiological damage caused by alcohol. Knowledge gained by reading SR.
* Finally understanding and appreciating a sense of tranquility

Reading the many posts on SR from long term sober folks paint a clear picture that it continues to get better. I look forward to enjoying the ride. The biggest thing I need to work on is finding social settings to enjoy. Being around drunks isn't a temptation anymore but it bores me. And I feel sad for friends in the grips of alcoholism.

If it helps, from day one my goal was to "Win the Day". Giving in to urges (and they are now far more infrequent and weaker) meant losing and I hate losing.

Sorry for the longish post. Congrats on 30 days, Billy. Those were my hardest. Hope everyone has a great weekend.
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Old 07-20-2013, 10:27 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Did you feel any different after 3 months, 6 months or a year of sobriety?
Ab-sooo-lute-ly! Medical folks actually say it takes 1-2 years to fully heal. Be patient with yourself and take it one day at a time. Congratulations on 30 days!
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Old 07-21-2013, 11:59 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Great question! And congratulations on 30 days! That's brilliant!

The first month is hard because you are going through a ton of changes on so many different levels. It's a lot to take on. But fear not, it gets so much better. By the second month I was starting to sleep again (until that point I was having awful involuntary muscle spasms every night) and my cravings went away . My horrible digestive issues were finally over (thank god!) and I started thinking clearly (and stopped taking everything personally). On a whim I took a yoga class during Month 3 and that opened everything up. I attended a few AA meetings and they were super cool but they aren't my thing. Instead I use a combination of yoga and mindfulness in my recovery. I also think the Year milestone is so important because you go through so many different experiences within the span of 365 days - birthdays, holidays, parties, events, work, ups and downs. Now I am almost to my second year milestone. My life has completely turned around. It's almost unrecognizable to the old days. I'm actually now a yoga instructor (this still sort of shocks me). I've lost about 30 pounds and I'm healthier than I have ever been. My anxiety is almost gone and my marriage is so fun. It's not all roses and things come up that throw me off balance sometimes, but I've grown up enough now that I am able to face life instead of running away. And I can honestly say that I don't miss drinking now and I am completely comfortable knowing that I will never drink again.

There are so many great days up ahead! Just hang in there a little longer. You are healing on a quantum scale right now. You are becoming what you were meant to be, and if you allow it your recovery can be a source of light to more than you can even imagine. Go YOU! You're awesome!

xo
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