PhaseTwo

I got sober on April 29th this year, so its been a little over two months. I'm having a tough time with Fourth of July because this is usually the point in the year when I go on a bender for the whole weekend at a local music festival. I guess I'm just wondering if it gets any easier from the two month point that I'm at. While I've noticed so many positive changes in my life ( health, money, generally better moods) it depresses me that I am only 22 years old and I've had to make this drastic change in my lifestyle. I don't know how to socialize anymore other than with my very closest friends. I basically have to re learn how to talk to girls because I used the courage from alcohol to do that since I was young. Drinking moderately is clearly not an option for me. Before I got sober I was drinking everyday for about a month and before that it was about 3 to 5 days a week for a couple years, usually getting drunk. I was having withdrawals and had to go to a medical detox at a hospital I don't know what I'm exactly trying to get at here. I guess I am just saying hello. I've been lurking on this forum for awhile, probably for about 6 months before I got sober I read this site knowing I had a problem. I've finally decided to post myself because as I said this weekend is tough for me.

Hevyn

Welcome PhaseTwo - it's great to have you join us.

You found a good place for support - we understand how rough this is in the early days. Not feeling alone should help. I used alcohol to cope with things all my life. I wish at 22 I had seen what it was doing to me - my whole life would have turned out so different. Be proud of yourself for seeing what needs to be done and taking action. It does get easier - at 2 months I was still very emotional and fragile. Everything changed, though - we go through many stages as we heal. I rarely think of drinking now - I never dreamed I'd reach that point.

We're glad you're here.

Sugah

AA? We have a lot of young people in our groups.

Peace & Love,
Sugah

PhaseTwo

I haven't gone to AA only because I am atheist and all the AA groups around my area are held at churches, so I expected them to be preaching finding a higher power. I know you're right I should probably go anyway just for the support of other people. I guess I'm also just afraid of 'exposing myself as an alcoholic' in my small town, which is stupid because everyone probably already knows. Essentially my strategy has been to isolate myself and focus on work, which I know needs to change. They also put me on naltrexone when I got out of the hospital which I still take because I don't notice any side effects from it.

Sugah

AA uses the word, God, though all that's required is a power greater than you. Many people use the group. Maybe go with an open mind and see what you think?

Peace & Love,
Sugah

BarbieKen

[QUOTE=PhaseTwo;4052297]I haven't gone to AA only because I am atheist and all the AA groups around my area are held at churches, so I expected them to be preaching finding a higher power. I know you're right I should probably go anyway just for the support of other people.
Hi
You'd be surprised how many folks share at meetings about the difficulty with the word "God". I include myself with these people. I'm 7 1/2 months sober. My home group meets at an old U.S. Post Office. My husband's meets at a church. When I was in a Women's Rehab, public meetings were held in the large activity room. I've attended meetings at public parks.
I personally consider myself a Spiritual person ( who let that part of me slip away while I got wasted). Alcoholism doesn't pick 'n choose, AA is truly a OPEN organization.....I find it to be a cross section of everyday people. I can only suggest attending some meetings. I had to 'shop around' till I found one that clicked. :-D. Bobbi

Tamerua

Hi phasetwo! Welcome!

fantail

The stuff you mention about learning social skills... all of us have to do that when we quit. I'm 29 and I feel pretty lucky that I'm quitting young enough that I don't really feel that far behind my peers. At 22, you have even more of an advantage in that sense. It's harder to be sober at your age because it's less common... but I was an early alcoholic too and while I luckily didn't cause myself too much harm in my twenties, I wasted a hell of a lot of time (and money, oh my god, so much wasted money).

It's really cool and really forward-thinking of you to get out of the game now. Congratulations on two months!!

PhaseTwo

Fantail, I can relate to the not causing myself to much harm. I think that is the biggest problem for me in keeping myself sober. Even though I was consistently drunk and blacking out on weekends frequently I still managed to graduate college and I have a good job. At the same time I know that I'm already having withdrawals at my age and it only gets worse. The constant thought of when you are next going to be able to drink is horrible and no way to live. Its amazing how when you first get sober you have this amazing conviction that you are going to never drink and be a better person but as time goes on it fades and you get bored with sobriety. I have to constantly remind myself of the feelings I had when I first got out of detox, and how I never want to return to that.

EndGameNYC

We also don't know which drink will push us into untreatable liver disease.

PhaseTwo

Yeah I had some pains in my side near my liver while I was drinking thankfully there was no serious damage. The reality that If I never stop it will happen to me hit home recently though as one of my friends moms died from drinking