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Normality scares me?

Old 06-26-2013, 11:46 AM
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Normality scares me?

Day eleven for me, longest I've managed for a while. Feeling great but being 'normal' scares me. I'm not used to it after 13 years of drink. Not used to facing life sober, anyone care to share their experiences? Just constantly on edge at the moment. Thank you
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Old 06-26-2013, 12:01 PM
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Hey there Bluebird Nice to see you.

This was one of the hardest weird kinda hurdles for me to get over. I am still not entirely sure what 'normal' is for me. I felt odd for a long time sober, physically odd, and very foggy. It got better gradually and although it took months it was worth hanging on for. It is a big transition to make which is why it sometimes takes a long time to get better. I am in my second year and I have never felt better but things are still improving. Just hang in there x
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Old 06-26-2013, 12:08 PM
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Originally Posted by hypochondriac View Post
Hey there Bluebird Nice to see you.

This was one of the hardest weird kinda hurdles for me to get over. I am still not entirely sure what 'normal' is for me. I felt odd for a long time sober, physically odd, and very foggy. It got better gradually and although it took months it was worth hanging on for. It is a big transition to make which is why it sometimes takes a long time to get better. I am in my second year and I have never felt better but things are still improving. Just hang in there x
Hello and thank you. Yeah I know it will be worth it in the long run, just got to stick at it
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Old 06-26-2013, 12:28 PM
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Originally Posted by Bluebird1927 View Post
Yeah I know it will be worth it in the long run, just got to stick at it
Easy to say hard to do I know. Have you got any support other than SR too? Is there anything you think has been missing in your attempts so far? x
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Old 06-26-2013, 01:03 PM
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Originally Posted by hypochondriac View Post

Easy to say hard to do I know. Have you got any support other than SR too? Is there anything you think has been missing in your attempts so far? x
My girlfriend of ten months kind of understands but no one really can fully unless they've been there. She's a great support though. Few people who understand my situation so not totally alone which is good. Funny thing is I don't want to drink, it's the last thing I want to do, I suppose it's just trying to find my sober self again
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Old 06-26-2013, 01:17 PM
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Are you attending AA meetings Bluebird?

All the best

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Old 06-26-2013, 01:21 PM
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Originally Posted by 2granddaughters View Post
Are you attending AA meetings Bluebird?

All the best

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No mate, not for me. Using SR, a good family and good friends.
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Old 06-26-2013, 01:46 PM
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Why be normal? Sober doesn't mean you have to conform!

If you're happy and living a constructive (to yourself, and others) life, and not hurting anyone, why worry?

I realized that sobriety is a great way to come to terms with being yourself and being happy with your natural traits.
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Old 06-26-2013, 02:03 PM
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Congrats on getting to day 11! It gets better. It can feel odd, yes And downright mystifying at times. The kinks do work out. Take care of yourself. Don't be too hard on yourself. Read a lot and educate yourself.
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Old 06-26-2013, 02:21 PM
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Please take be easy on yourself. It will take time to discover the real you, your interests, goals and desires. Last night someone told me something which rang true. For now, put sobriety first. Set little goals, a small walk or hike, take notice of things you are able to accomplish now that you are not waking up with a hangover. For me, it was taking my dog to the park this morning.

We can do this
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Old 06-26-2013, 11:31 PM
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Thanks for your great comments. I woke up this morning after another night of beautiful sober sleep and never want to sniff a drink let alone taste one. Feel great. I am doing plenty of reading this time around and getting out and about enjoying sobriety instead of fighting the booze. Thank you again for your great comments
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Old 06-27-2013, 05:17 AM
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I remember the first couple months I was constantly walking around thinking "is this what sober feels like? am I normal right now, or am I still weird?"

I guess one of the surprises for me has been that normal is so... not normal! I just had no idea (or had completely forgotten, more accurately) how many different moods and states of mind one can go through without any substances or even external factors. I still find myself kind of amazed when I do something really absent-minded or impulsive and think the next day, "huh! and I was sober!"

Or, on a more positive note... and this only began happening in the last month or so... I'll be doing something I enjoy or laughing with friends or listening to music and I'll just be thinking, "I feel drunk! I'm dead sober but I could almost swear I'd been drinking!"
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Old 06-27-2013, 05:20 AM
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Originally Posted by fantail View Post
I remember the first couple months I was constantly walking around thinking "is this what sober feels like? am I normal right now, or am I still weird?"

I guess one of the surprises for me has been that normal is so... not normal! I just had no idea (or had completely forgotten, more accurately) how many different moods and states of mind one can go through without any substances or even external factors. I still find myself kind of amazed when I do something really absent-minded or impulsive and think the next day, "huh! and I was sober!"

Or, on a more positive note... and this only began happening in the last month or so... I'll be doing something I enjoy or laughing with friends or listening to music and I'll just be thinking, "I feel drunk! I'm dead sober but I could almost swear I'd been drinking!"
I get what you mean about the natural highs and the feeling of being drunk. I can honestly say that in the last week I've laughed more than I ever did the 12 years I drunk. Natural good feelings of happiness, not drug induced numbness.
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Old 06-27-2013, 11:53 AM
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Just poured my girlfriend a glass of wine and it felt normal that I would have a cup of tea. No cravings at all. Strange. Already had my buzz from a heavy weights session earlier. I'm not getting complacent at all though. I'm still one second away from a drink but also one second away from staying sober
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Old 06-27-2013, 11:59 AM
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It's been many years and I still often get that natural high feeling. I love that everything became more intense for me when I quit. Before, things seemed very dulled all the way around. Now things are crisp and clear and real.
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Old 06-27-2013, 12:30 PM
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Originally Posted by soberlicious View Post
It's been many years and I still often get that natural high feeling. I love that everything became more intense for me when I quit. Before, things seemed very dulled all the way around. Now things are crisp and clear and real.
Im staring out of my window and everything seems so fresh and clearer. I see possibilities not obstacles
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Old 06-27-2013, 01:30 PM
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Yes! I had people tell me early on that the feeling would fade...that it was a "pink cloud" of being newly sober. I have found that to be a total crock of shite. I recovered my zest for life that was lost to addiction for a very long time. That feeling never ever has to go away. Anyone who tells you that it does is sadly mistaken.

Doesn't mean there aren't super hard times. There are. But there is great satisfaction in getting through them without being dulled. It reinforces that I am strong, smart, and capable. Something I never realized when I was addicted. Something I'll never let go of again.

High on life? Why yes I am! Lol
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Old 06-27-2013, 01:45 PM
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Originally Posted by soberlicious View Post
Yes! I had people tell me early on that the feeling would fade...that it was a "pink cloud" of being newly sober. I have found that to be a total crock of shite. I recovered my zest for life that was lost to addiction for a very long time. That feeling never ever has to go away. Anyone who tells you that it does is sadly mistaken.

Doesn't mean there aren't super hard times. There are. But there is great satisfaction in getting through them without being dulled. It reinforces that I am strong, smart, and capable. Something I never realized when I was addicted. Something I'll never let go of again.

High on life? Why yes I am! Lol
me too and long may it last
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Old 06-27-2013, 03:23 PM
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Congrats on 11 days..and your attitude is awesome. I soooo hear you though on feeling "odd". I totally feel like I have no idea what I'm doing or how to live. I feel like I've been sitting in the dark and someone turned on the lights and I'm all squinty-eyed and dumbfounded and disoriented. I feel emotionally arrested, immature and awkward..ALOT...but for some reason, I'm kinda lovin' it.
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Old 06-27-2013, 09:05 PM
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Congrats on day 11! I felt the same way after getting sober, like I'd been dropped on another planet. Take heart......It really does get better.

One thing that helped me was taking it a day at a time, just dealing with what's in front of me, instead of letting my mind run wild. Be patient with yourself - things will fall into place with time.
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