I'm learning to deal with this
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Join Date: May 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 224
I'm learning to deal with this
The last two months have been eye opening. I've gone sober three times.
The first time was on a lark and was never sincere..it lasted around 5 days. I learned from that experience that it had to be a sincere desire to quit.
The second time was about a week and a half later. I think it last 8 or 10 days..not sure. It ended with a week of moderate drinking and two nights on the weekend of more than moderate drinking. Prior to those two heavy episodes, I knew the moderation experiment was failing and I had set my quit day for this past Sunday. I learned that the little voice in my head would try to convince me that moderation was possible...it's hard to accept, but it's not feasible. Also during that week off the wagon, I started to realize that it wasn't the hangover, anxiety and **** filled days that i only didn't like...I actually started to feel that I didn't like drinking. I missed my sober days. Sunday was a no brainier for me.
It's been a semi tough three days, but not as bad as the 1st or 2nd attempt. The boredom of those attempts is nonexistent. A few night sweats and some slight withdrawal, the bad part is the lack of motivation at the office and the brain fog, which seems to be clearing a bit.
I want to keep this up. Sorry for any typos...iPads kinda suck.
The first time was on a lark and was never sincere..it lasted around 5 days. I learned from that experience that it had to be a sincere desire to quit.
The second time was about a week and a half later. I think it last 8 or 10 days..not sure. It ended with a week of moderate drinking and two nights on the weekend of more than moderate drinking. Prior to those two heavy episodes, I knew the moderation experiment was failing and I had set my quit day for this past Sunday. I learned that the little voice in my head would try to convince me that moderation was possible...it's hard to accept, but it's not feasible. Also during that week off the wagon, I started to realize that it wasn't the hangover, anxiety and **** filled days that i only didn't like...I actually started to feel that I didn't like drinking. I missed my sober days. Sunday was a no brainier for me.
It's been a semi tough three days, but not as bad as the 1st or 2nd attempt. The boredom of those attempts is nonexistent. A few night sweats and some slight withdrawal, the bad part is the lack of motivation at the office and the brain fog, which seems to be clearing a bit.
I want to keep this up. Sorry for any typos...iPads kinda suck.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
I agree....iPads do kinda suck, even while being simultaneously cool.
I'm glad this time feels different to you. This can be it...the last time you quit. The end of addiction. Honestly, there are no words for how good it feels to be out from under that sh*t. Life is infinitely better without booze.
I assume from your screen name that you're a crossfitter. I bet you are going to see your performance go up. If you were good before, you're going to be AH-mazing now.
I'm glad this time feels different to you. This can be it...the last time you quit. The end of addiction. Honestly, there are no words for how good it feels to be out from under that sh*t. Life is infinitely better without booze.
I assume from your screen name that you're a crossfitter. I bet you are going to see your performance go up. If you were good before, you're going to be AH-mazing now.
now's the time
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 2,181
Originally Posted by Crossfitdad 
I started to realize that it wasn't the hangover, anxiety and **** filled days that i only didn't like...I actually started to feel that I didn't like drinking. I missed my sober days.
I've been starting to feel that way also... that I actually value the presence of my sobriety, not just the absence of my drinking problem. When I have drinking dreams now, they're always about having a glass of wine and then really disliking the feeling of being not sober.
A really cool corner to turn, I think.
Sounds like a really productive month!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Wesley Chapel, Florida
Posts: 19
Once you've had a really good taste of sobriety and I mean living a life without fences and doing things that you never thought possible going back is the last thing you will most likely ever think about. I never knew I could handle the world with some substance. Today I not only handle it , I control it and I'm beyond happy. Even on my bad days.
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Join Date: May 2013
Location: US East Coast
Posts: 1,972
Very happy to hear that you are finding your true motivation and commitment. The brain fog will be with you for a while I am afraid. I find that most days I can still work through it. Just knowing what it is, and why I have it, helps me to tolerate it. My optimism and professional ambition have been slowly, but steadily coming back.
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