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Did I just make things worse ?

Old 06-15-2013, 06:45 AM
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Did I just make things worse ?

Well after 5-6 years of heavy drinking, I decided to stop after some liver pains following a binge last weekend.

For 2 days I limited myself to 1 light beer to keep the major symptoms at bay and it worked for the most part. Then I went 3 days with nothing.

I actually only felt really bad on day 3 - I felt scared (most of all), shaky, restless, nauseous, cold sweats - ya'll know the drill. But later that day a wave of calm passed over me and I felt like I was on drugs - it was wonderfully weird.

Yesterday I felt great all day, but then for some reason around 9:30 PM I was getting crazy urges. Just one to take the edge off, I kept telling myself. I paced around a while, I tried to calm down, but I couldn't. I caved. I went downstairs and had a big "sip" from my friends Old Fashioned. My brain felt better but my body didn't - the same pains I had throughout my abdomen all week came back for an hour or so.

Today is the next morning and I am so pissed at myself. I feel like a failure. Did I offset the progress I made ? Did I essentially step back 3 days ? Did that one big sip make much of a difference ?

I know this may seem petty to some. I tend to overthink things, which is why I have put off quitting for so long. I just know this kinda thing is finicky. I used to love me some opiates before I started drinking, and quickly figured out that even just one night of that stuff could put me right back to where I was at my worst.

I'm still very much committed to quitting, I just don't wanna feel like I ruined 100% of the progress I have made.
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Old 06-15-2013, 07:11 AM
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Welcome. Your making a good start being here. Medically I can't help you except to stay stopped which is simple but not easy for most. I learned and practice what I have for sobriety from going to AA which for some reason scares many. I need the contact with people who understand me. There is a lot of information here about stopping drinking as well, without personal contact which a lot like. Keep coming. BE WELL
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Old 06-15-2013, 07:17 AM
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Congrats on the effort, keep on keeping on. You can't change what you've done, you can only change what you do. Learn your lesson and move forward.
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Old 06-15-2013, 07:32 AM
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Drinking always makes things worse.

But, you can use this to your benefit. The key is that next time you're cravey, you have to remember that if you have even just a sip, you're going to be back to where you are now, feeling like you've lost your progress.

The good news is that you haven't entirely lost those three days. You learned from them. Now, you know and all of us here know that you are more than capable of going three days. And now you've learned how you DON'T get to 4 days. Which means, you have the option of trying a NEW way to get to 4 days.
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Old 06-15-2013, 07:34 AM
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No,I don't think you off set the progress you made. Any day sober is a big progress. And as long as you don't keep on drinking,your withdrawals should be a lot easier if you just stay stopped.
The problem is,three days from now(or anytime in the next week). When the urge comes back again with a vengeance,you might be prone to think aw what the hell,I just can't do this. That is the way I always thought about it anyway.
Carrol used to say those urges only last a few minutes,and she was right. But those minutes seem like an eternity. We all know the first week or two is hell. Thats why it's soo hard to quit. And it's even harder to do alone. For me AA and this board helped immensely. It is a great help to do this with other people that are trying to do the same thing. Doing it alone is tough.
The only thing we have to do is not pick up the first drink. It is that simple. But it is unbelievable how something so simple is soooo difficult.
You ARE making progress.
I wish you the best.
Fred
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Old 06-15-2013, 11:57 AM
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Originally Posted by reedzkee View Post
Did I essentially step back 3 days ? Did that one big sip make much of a difference ?
I don't think it wipes out progress. Progress is cumulative. But it is a slip and it makes a difference in that you are still in the grip of your addiction. Notice how easy it was to cave into the "voice" that said drink. It happens at three days, three weeks, three months.

If you need to take something from your "sip" take this--be vigilant in your recovery. Your alcoholism isn't taking any days off. Your sobriety can't either.
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Old 06-15-2013, 01:28 PM
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It was just a sip or a slip, just get back on track. In the end, only you can decide what your sobriety date is. If you feel good calling this a minor blip, that you are passed it and back to sobriety than day four it is. Whatever keeps you sober for several months. That is when you'll really start to roll.
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Old 06-15-2013, 02:54 PM
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There's still much progress to be made. Don't worry about the past and what may be ruined. You have to focus on the present and not drinking right now. If it is too difficult for you, get professional help during withdrawal. However, do not dwell on what you may or may not have done, because its done.
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Old 06-15-2013, 10:53 PM
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Originally Posted by reedzkee View Post
Well after 5-6 years of heavy drinking, I decided to stop after some liver pains following a binge last weekend.

For 2 days I limited myself to 1 light beer to keep the major symptoms at bay and it worked for the most part. Then I went 3 days with nothing.

I actually only felt really bad on day 3 - I felt scared (most of all), shaky, restless, nauseous, cold sweats - ya'll know the drill. But later that day a wave of calm passed over me and I felt like I was on drugs - it was wonderfully weird.

Yesterday I felt great all day, but then for some reason around 9:30 PM I was getting crazy urges. Just one to take the edge off, I kept telling myself. I paced around a while, I tried to calm down, but I couldn't. I caved. I went downstairs and had a big "sip" from my friends Old Fashioned. My brain felt better but my body didn't - the same pains I had throughout my abdomen all week came back for an hour or so.

Today is the next morning and I am so pissed at myself. I feel like a failure. Did I offset the progress I made ? Did I essentially step back 3 days ? Did that one big sip make much of a difference ?

I know this may seem petty to some. I tend to overthink things, which is why I have put off quitting for so long. I just know this kinda thing is finicky. I used to love me some opiates before I started drinking, and quickly figured out that even just one night of that stuff could put me right back to where I was at my worst.

I'm still very much committed to quitting, I just don't wanna feel like I ruined 100% of the progress I have made.
You are too new to have offset anything really substantial, but you will have to start again. The important thing is you change up your sobriety plan a little and maybe limit your exposure to alcohol for a while. That includes being with friends who have it in their house, or having it in your own home. You can do this, dont focus on your slip up, just learn from it and try again.
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