What is your single biggest motivator in staying sober ?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Bristol England
Posts: 17
Originally Posted by Gottalife 
I no longer have a problem with alcohol. The problem has been removed. It does not exist for me. I have been placed in a position of neutrality, safe and protected. I lost the power of choice in drink and now I don't have to choose - that debate is closed. I cannot drink and that's all there is to it.
In the same way I cannot fly. I don't wake up each morning and make a choice not to fly. If you found me at the edge of a cliff thinking I had a choice of whether to fly or not, you might well question my sanity. Actually, I could probably fly alright, it's the landing that would be problematic!
In the same way I cannot fly. I don't wake up each morning and make a choice not to fly. If you found me at the edge of a cliff thinking I had a choice of whether to fly or not, you might well question my sanity. Actually, I could probably fly alright, it's the landing that would be problematic!
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now's the time
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 2,181
It's changed and evolved over the course of my (young) sobriety. Right now I'd say: honesty.
It strikes me that I wasn't confronting the world on its own terms, before. I wasn't living my life or experiencing my mind fully. I was avoiding reality, which I knew, but now that I have a few months of seeing the difference, I've been feeling that the way I was living was dishonest, in a certain sense. Not just in the sense that I was hiding my drinking. Also in the sense that I was always trying to find a shortcut through life. I was trying to achieve strength, courage, and lack of attachment without actually earning those qualities. I was trying to cheat, basically.
These days I feel it's really, really important to me that I become the person I want to be through honest means. I've chosen a somewhat unconventional path for my life so far, and I want to be able to look myself in the mirror and know that it's because I'm brave, not because I've drowned my fear. And when I make mistakes, I want to own them, not have the convenient scapegoat of an addiction.
It strikes me that I wasn't confronting the world on its own terms, before. I wasn't living my life or experiencing my mind fully. I was avoiding reality, which I knew, but now that I have a few months of seeing the difference, I've been feeling that the way I was living was dishonest, in a certain sense. Not just in the sense that I was hiding my drinking. Also in the sense that I was always trying to find a shortcut through life. I was trying to achieve strength, courage, and lack of attachment without actually earning those qualities. I was trying to cheat, basically.
These days I feel it's really, really important to me that I become the person I want to be through honest means. I've chosen a somewhat unconventional path for my life so far, and I want to be able to look myself in the mirror and know that it's because I'm brave, not because I've drowned my fear. And when I make mistakes, I want to own them, not have the convenient scapegoat of an addiction.
Nothing is impossible!
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: EAGAN
Posts: 792
Originally Posted by alphaomega
Friday night is messing with my head.
Need a few "Reasons to Stay the Course " boost from those in the know.
With gratitude...
Need a few "Reasons to Stay the Course " boost from those in the know.
With gratitude...
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 66
Gratitude I got a second, third, fiftieth chance.
God's grace.
Realizing I could have killed someone, nearly killed myself.
While sober life isn't easy, for me it is so much better than the life I was living under the control of alcohol.
God's grace.
Realizing I could have killed someone, nearly killed myself.
While sober life isn't easy, for me it is so much better than the life I was living under the control of alcohol.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 443
Originally Posted by Gottalife
I lost the power of choice in drink and now I don't have to choose - that debate is closed. I cannot drink and that's all there is to it....
In the same way I cannot fly. I don't wake up each morning and make a choice not to fly.
In the same way I cannot fly. I don't wake up each morning and make a choice not to fly.
Drinking is simply not a matter of choice for me. I can no more drink than I can fly. Neither is possible and therefore it not worth even entertaining the thought....
I had not heard it put exactly this way before, but somehow it strikes me as a key insight. Thanks to Gottalife for posting it.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 140
Becoming the greatest accountant, ever! 
Honestly though, I'll be just fine settling with finishing college (and this summer semester for that matter).
In all seriousness I don't think it's just one particular huge thing that keeps me sober. It's relationships, keeping a clear head, goals I'm fulfilling, and physical health are all reasons.
Honestly though, I'll be just fine settling with finishing college (and this summer semester for that matter).
In all seriousness I don't think it's just one particular huge thing that keeps me sober. It's relationships, keeping a clear head, goals I'm fulfilling, and physical health are all reasons.
Grateful to be free
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 3,680
Active addiction took so much time, effort, money and health, that it that nothing was left for any of the things I wanted in life. I don't want to be that pathetic gross loser wasting my life and feeling crappy and broke all the time because of it.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Hayward
Posts: 69
I really like this question! I think about this almost everyday and especially when I start to get down on myself.
My single biggest motivator for staying sober is...not being hungover.
Sounds simple, but it has gotten me this far in my sobriety and I'm NOT going back to where I used to be.
My single biggest motivator for staying sober is...not being hungover.
Sounds simple, but it has gotten me this far in my sobriety and I'm NOT going back to where I used to be.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: London
Posts: 1,384
Lately soberiety has been very good and easy, mainly because I have totally changed the way I look at this drug. Masses of sheep drink because they feel they have to drink to enjoy anything, my motivation is that I am free from all this brainwashing and conditioning and do not want to be like the sheep masses that drink. Sober is cool. I know I am never going back ever also makes things easier .
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,168
Knowing that my grandson will never see me drunk
Gottalife, totally agree! what you wrote sums me up too! I find it extremely liberating. No longer do I have to consider how much alcohol I will be able to consume when planning a day/night out or trip away. I feel sorry and a bit sad for old me.
Gottalife, totally agree! what you wrote sums me up too! I find it extremely liberating. No longer do I have to consider how much alcohol I will be able to consume when planning a day/night out or trip away. I feel sorry and a bit sad for old me.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 104
I think I deserve a better life than I had when I was an active alcoholic. I didn't think so then, but as I become a better (and sober) person, I'm beginning to think more and more that I deserve a chance at a good life.
Recovering ostrich
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Tampa Bay, Florida
Posts: 2,551
When I was drinking, I was waiting to die. That's the honest truth and I wasn't a daily drinker. I was a bad binger and I wouldn't think twice about taking meds with it. I would have died. And I absolutely loathed myself, spent all day in my head, beating myself up for everything or hating everyone else. It is so good to be free from all of that!
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
Being sober for my dogs, to take the best care of them. When I was drinking they got slipshod care, hit or miss, and I still feel bad about that. But now I give them my all, the best of me.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Nampa, Idaho
Posts: 15
My biggest motivator to get sober is the fact that two weeks ago I was drunk and tripped and if my fiance hadn't been in the right place at the right time I would have fallen on our 3 month old baby girl. I was beyond disgusted with myself. If I had killed her there is no doubt in my mind I would have taken my own life that night. I havent gotten drunk since then.. but I have continue to drink. I just space them out so I never get more than tipsy.. I know I need to stop.
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