Nowell

Hello folks,

I came upon this thread b/c my ex fiancé, who was in recovery for 10 years (main DOAs - alcohol and coke) broke up with me suddenly 6 months or so ago, after what I just found out was a relapse on MDMA and other hallucinogens relapse.
I came here to find out more about what might be in store for him. Either way, I know it’s not good.
I never did any of that but I am a recovering alcoholic so I know it’s bad...
Still, knowing what I know, this **** sucks. I’m really afraid for him and I feel SO POWERLESS.

KCB. I will.

doggonecarl

Sorry for what has prompted your post. If the dam hasn't burst already with you boyfriend's relapse, it's at least leaking.

It's up to him to do what he knows he has to do. You are powerless as it pertains to his recovery. You are POWERFUL when it comes to yours. Don't lose yourself in your bf's problem.

oak

That would be hard. Take good care of yourself.

spent31

Well, I have heard (for alcoholics anyway) it only takes one month to get back to the point of abuse were you left off before getting sober. After that point it progressively gets worse until you are in more trouble than you were in the first time you decided to get help. This may not be true for everyone. However, I could definitely see it being possible. While I was in treatment I seen a guy with 3 months sobriety leave and come back a week later and was a wreck. It looked as though he aged 10 years in a week. I dunno what is in store for your ex but it is not going to be good for or the people around him. So, like doggonecarl was saying be sure not to let it affect your recovery. You will have to be selfish at this point should he try to contact you again.

Ngokpa

Any of us can relapse. And it happens all the time.

There are times when emotionally we feel overwhelmed. Or else we get bored. That's why we have to work a program to be quite clear about how crazy our behavior has been and what to expect if we go back out. Personally I'm not a traditionalist, but I've had to do a lot of work anyway. At times I've hit an emotional bottom. But instead of going out, I became willing to do something I hadn't been willing to do before.

Nowell

Thank you, everyone, so much for the honest, yet kind, words and support.
I agree with all of your advise, and, fortunately, I've remained willing too work hard in trying times too- this experience included. It's been horrible but the worst was not knowing what the hell happened. It was like he spun around in a phone booth and became a different person - or he switched faces, like in that cheesey movie, Faceoff. In all seriousness, it sucked, and the reasons he gave me were so vague. I don't really know how to feel now, other than grateful that I am sober. I will continue to do what's good for me and my sobriety. Ngokpa- what did you mean when you said that you aren't a traditionalist?