Can't wait for the alcohol to be out of my system
 

I've been through this more times than I can count. The first day is the hardest and each day after I feel better and better. And then somewhere down the line, I think I can drink - a little- again. But that little bit just opens the flood gates and before I know it I'm doing the same stuff all over again. I'm not drinking today, but I had probably almost 12 beers last night and after an awful night's sleep and waking up foggy and bloated, I just want to feel good again. I'm lucky because all I need is one day and I start to feel the benefits. But now I can almost feel the blood racing through my veins and an overwhelming sense of exhausted.
I trying not to be too hard on myself for these relapses, but then again, I wonder if I'm too easy on myself and that's why it keeps happening. I am so much better than I was 2 years ago, but am desperate to get to a point where I am just done...for good, and mean it. Today is the first day of my summer vacation,and I am determined to make it a sober summer. I can't drink anymore. I just have to end this cycle once and for all, and go back to the good stuff, which only happens when I'm not drinking.
Sorry for rambling, I just have to get it out of my head, and move on with my sober life. I have to stop relapsing, starting today.

:doggy: i know exactly how that getting stuff out of your head thing is, i have to do the same thing. Good luck to you. I don't know anything about your situation, but i am sure there are some loved ones in your life that are praying for you and your recovery

Hi forabetterlife :)

I don;t think it's a question of being too easy, or too hard, on yourself. Just focus on what you need to do now. Think about the changes you need to make, and about the support that can help you get there.

You can not only have a great summer, but a great life in the years beyond that too :)

D