AlcoStudent86

I'm a young alcoholic at the age of 27 who has cravings nearly every 2-3 days, and often worsen over the space of a week - however that I only get cravings twice a week means nothing, as there are other days when I don't get cravings, I decide to drink anyway. So my question is (a) can an alcoholic with time become a social/ moderate/ once-a-week drinker like most people*, or (b) is complete abstinence the only option for truly beating alcoholism, given the potential danger of relapse?


*While, I realise that this is probably not the norm in more Southern European/ Latin American cultures were a glass of wine is drank daily with dinner, where I come from the tradition is to drink a lot of beer one night of the week, usually on a Friday or Saturday, so I did not mean to imply that more Latin drinking norms are abnormal or anything.

Dave H

If you are someone who just likes to drink and can control it, more power to you. But if you are an alcoholic - someone is addicted to alcohol, then the answer is NO! You are 27 years old. You are YOUNG. And you at the age where you will try and find any excuse to continue drinking. But the fact is, if you have an addiction, then it will ruin your life. It will destroy your job, your family, your reputation, your health and may take your life.

Do not "Flirt" with your addiction! Get into rehab, attend meetings, surround yourself with sober people and put this behind you. Either that, or prepare for a hightmare-ish life as you grow older in your addiction.

MeSoSober

Anne M. Fletcher covers this in her book Sober for Good. She collected information from 222 "masters," former problem drinkers almost all of whom had at least five continuous years of sobriety, about their drinking habits and how they quit. She said that the vast majority of them believed that they could not drink at all, a handful was able to drink moderately, and another dozen or so have only a small amount of alcohol on rare occasions.

But she makes it quite clear that she is "not suggesting that moderate or even occasional drinking is a workable goal for most people with serious drinking problems."

I completely understand why someone would cling to hope of drinking moderately, but while it is theoretically possible, it seems pretty reckless to jeopardize your sobriety when the stakes are so high.

raku

My idea is if you think you have a problem with drinking alcohol, you do ! I would not even consider moderation in the future, after tackling and achieving sobriety...It's a gift, especially when you are so young !

caboblanco

with all do respect this is not the place to put forth the idea as moderation as an option. I know people who could moderate by be definition I wouldn't call them alcoholics

NapsteR1

No. Sorry but no, don't kid yourself. If you can't stop, don't start. The older you get the more doors you come to realise your drinking has closed for you - then that realisation fuels a need for drink as an escape - that force joins the cravings and you're on a one way street.

sugarbear1

I had a lot of control when I was in my 20's. 30's, slightly less. 40's, some of the time I did, sometimes I rationalized getting wasted.

By the age of 50, I had enough. It was only a nightly six pack, or less, sometimes more, but I had enough.

cleargoals

27 was when I started thinking about my alcohol intake more seriously, when first I noticed I did not have much control over it. But told myself it was not a problem to binge on weekends or drink "moderately" 4 days in a week (3-4 pints of beer a night, binges on weekends). After all, I could "stop" for days or even a work week. Kept this up for a few years and it gradually, yearly, got worse. 5 years I found myself in a pattern of daily drinking... and went downhill very fast within several months from a daily bottle of wine or 8 pack beer to almost double that quantity for weeks on end, only managing a day or two off. So in 6 years it progressed from "drinking problem" to "daily alcoholic" who could not abstain for more than a day. Got sober and managed 6 months, relapsed for about 17 back to the insane daily drinking.

I can definitely say in in my case, cravings were what I also used as an indicator back then and I told myself were not out of control. So I wasn't really an alcoholic right? "All" people I knew drank like me, "everyone" I discussed it with said I was normal and not an alcoholic. I felt quite in control. However, it were other things than cravings that progressed my alcoholism over the years; difficult periods, stressful times, first becoming mentally and then becoming physically addicted and the latter, especially crept up on me and I suddenly became aware... when it was already too late.

I am very glad it wasn't already too late to make the choice for sobriety. But at 27 I never thought it could and would become so serious and so hard to achieve that.

LosingmyMisery

If you dig deep down in the basement here, you will find endless threads that address this same topic. Many attempted, sadly, it didn't work out as they had hoped. In a sense, I feel it is doubtful. For myself, it is impossible.

AlcoStudent86

Thanks for the replies. However, I would like to ask about cravings, (a) are they permanent, or (b) do they eventually disappear after quitting drinking, and if so - how many days/ weeks or above does it take to be free of alcohol cravings?

MeSoSober

Your mileage will vary, but I think they are almost universally GREATLY diminished with time.

paulokes

If you want to play Russian Roulette, good luck to you. I know a handful of people who returned to moderate social drinking and lots more who died or came close trying.

When I'm honest with myself, I don't think I could return to moderate social drinking and I have no desire to today. I'm not missing out on anything, from my own experience.

I'm certain from my own experience it is possible to be a non-drinker and not miss it/ have no cravings. But if you're hankering after it in the back of your mind you may find this more painful. Realizing the hopelessness of my situation helped me. Drinking stopped being an option and I had to look for others.

P

AlcoStudent86

But do they ever go, and if so - what would be a possible time frame for getting rid of cravings for alcohol out of one's life?

LosingmyMisery

I quit and struggled through 60 days, then relapsed. Went 30 more days and relapsed again. It is when I got serious and committed to working a program I stayed sober. I never wanted to drink again and haven't had a craving since, going on nine years now. I believe the key is in gaining knowledge and support through programs and other outlets. However, I think everyone can experience things differently for different reasons.

TheEnd

Cravings will eventually disappear and you will be free from that need to drink. So when you get to this point, you have to ask yourself, is it really worth it even try?

choublak

There's no real way of knowing exactly when the cravings will go away, as it is different for everyone. It's more about learning to deal with them.

DoubleBarrel

This is your addictive voice talking in my opinion.

Mine has always tried to convince me that I have sobered up, and will be fine if I just have a few occasionally.

Guess how well that's worked out.

Jsober

Cravings become less intense over time. That is all they are, just cravings and they pass. If you make it through strong cravings without drinking you become stronger. It takes time, months or years, but they do alleviate. I have been sober for over two years and they still come from time to time but they usually pass quickly. The point is I don't act on cravings and you don't have to either.

To your other question. An alcoholic cannot moderate over the long haul. I could on several occasions but that was just fooling myself. I would always end up drinking more than I intended. Abstinence was the only answer for me. It took too many experiments to figure this out but it is the truth.

least

I tried moderating but never was successful at it. Easier for me to quit completely.

bi11fish

This pretty much sums it up for me

"We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals - usually brief - were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness.
Over any considerable period we get worse, never better." from pg 33 of the Big Book
Cravings will go away that does not mean the thought of a drink will not enter my head -I am an alcoholic after all